I grip the polished wooden banister until my hand aches. A resistance? Ian hasn’t mentioned anything about it.
“The Rose girl? I don’t trust her. Ian, she could be the most talented mage in the world, and it wouldn’t change the fact that she’s the daughter of one of our foremost enemies—and soon to be mated to another of them.”
I clench my jaw to keep a whimper from escaping.
“She won’t be mated if I have anything to say about it,” Ian growls.
“Ian,” Cadigan begins, censure in his voice. “She’s barely more than a child. Your obsession with her?—”
I already know what he’s going to say; he’ll tell Ian what he told him after the Feast of Lunaria. That his feelings for me areunseemly.
I don’t stay to hear Ian’s response. I bolt, racing up the stairs to the top floor of the library and the little reading nook beneath the stained-glass windows. In the deepening twilight, the scene caught in the glass is ominous.
The first tears fall as I throw myself into one of the two armchairs in the quiet, empty corner of the library. Marcus kneels in front of me and takes one of my hands, but I look away from him.
I know the sway Cadigan holds over Ian. Ian has turned away from me after talking to his mentor before. It had hurt then. Now it would be devastating.
Saints, he’ll never believe me when I tell him about the poisonous, bitter slur or shining silver septagram I caught in Cadigan’s thoughts.
“There you are,” Ian breathes, and I look up sharply.
Marcus steps aside and then Ian is before me, my hands in both of his.
“Your affinity. You heard?”
I nod, not trusting my voice.
“How much?”
“Enough,” I murmur.
He sighs, dropping down into a crouch in front of me. “Juniper, my sweet love. A better man would give you up.”
He can’t even look me in the eye, and I feel my heart sinking in my chest.
“I took advantage,” he says quietly. “I was in a position of authority over you. Saints, I was yourprofessor. My actions weren’t—aren’t—the actions of a good alpha. To take advantage of my position?—”
“All alphas are in a position of authority over me, Ian. All of them.”
“Juniper, you have to understand…”
When he stepped back from the inevitable bond between us in the spring for the sake of propriety, for the sake of what’s seemly, he let me down gently, his voice soft, but tormented just as it is now.
“Please, no,” I murmur, my lower lip trembling as tears slip down my cheeks. “Not again, Ian. I won’t survive it.”
His face goes slack, his ice-blue eyes wide, and he pulls me from the chair, down into his arms, holding me so close that we both shake with my ragged sobs. “Oh, my darling. No. Saints, no. I hate that I’ve done things to make you doubt me. I said a better man would give you up, but I’mnota better man. I wish I could be, if only for you. I wish I could give you the world and be the alpha you deserve.”
“You’re the alpha I chose,” I whisper against his skin. “The alpha I want. My choices have been made for me my whole life, but then I met you. And I made my own choice. Ichoseyou, and I’ll keep choosing you. I don’t want the world. I just want you to choose me.”
He sets me back on my heels and looks up, a sheen of unshed tears in his eyes. He trembles, my imperious alpha, as he kisses my forehead, each of my cheeks and the very tip of my nose. “Always, Juniper. I willalwayschoose you.”
My heart pounds in my chest and thumps in my ears at his soft-spoken promise.
“But we have to be careful,” he says, looking around the deserted corner of the library before brushing a sweet kiss across my lips. “That’s what I needed you to understand. If someone sees us…”
If someone sees us, we could be forced apart. Saints, if my father found out… If Rad tells him or the headmaster… Our love is so precarious. It could be stolen from us so easily. I slip from his arms and stand, smoothing down the front of my uniform. “We can talk more in your office. I’ll meet you there for our standing research appointment in a few minutes,” I murmur. “Let me just splash some water on my face.”
He hesitates, but finally nods and then heads toward the stairs, stopping to look back at me as I gather my things. My heart squeezes painfully in my chest at the hope and love shining from his handsome face as he takes me in.
