“Well, I’m not going, so it’s only Junie’s first time.”
“Now Junebug,” Bitsy says gravely. “The first time can be hard, even if you know what to expect when it comes to—”
“Miss Jordan,” Leigh sighs. “Can we get through one class session without you bringing up alpha anatomy?”
“But Leigh,” Bitsy says sweetly. “Bringing itupis what I’m best at.”
Ellie groans and Alyssa rolls her eyes, but shocking us all, Leigh merely shoots her an exasperated look.
“Something I hope your father never finds out about. Now, you will all be expected to be on your best behavior at the ball. For many of you, there may be advantageous matches to be made or suitors to impress. If nothing else, it is a chance to demonstrate your poise and bearing and be a credit to your upbringing.
To be a credit to the Rose name would mean being someone I never want to be, someone with no regard for the lives of others, especially omegas. No, I don’t hope to do any credit to my upbringing.
I’ve spent too long unlearning all those wretched lessons.
But I will have to pretend to be that omega, that perfect porcelain doll daughter, if only for the night. I’ll have to simper and bare my neck, duck my head so I don’t meet the eyes of the alphas my father has deemed my betters. I’ve been pretending for years. It’s a delicate act, but one I’ve mastered. I hide my fear until I need to show it to appease an alpha with too short of a temper, cover my disgust until I can excuse myself and retch in the ladies’ room.
“For some of you,” she says, her eyes landing on me, “your attendance at Fairhaven is subject to your behavior here, and you have been behaving in a way your families would not consider fitting for omegas of your status. This is your chance to rededicate yourself to the paths your families have laid out for you.”
The path of flinching and meekness, the path of sorrow and loneliness. The path of chastity. I have long since strayed and I have no intention of returning to the path my father set out for me.
But for one night, I can pretend.
Because it won’t just be my father who will be watching.
And I must do what I can to keep Trinity Wells alive.
* * *
“I would liketo apply for an assistantship for my sophomore year,” I say firmly.
“Junes, can’t we talk about this?” Cassian looks up at me through those soulful, smoke and whiskey eyes that so ensnared me when I was younger.
“I would prefer we stick to academic topics,” I bite out, taking my seat and folding my hands in my lap. I can’t yet bear to hear about how much Cassian loves the beta who won my heart, how they found the perfect mates in each other, when I had foolishly thought I had found the same in both of them. “I believe each of the professors I’ve had this term would gladly take me on as a research or teaching assistant next autumn and I would like to explore my opportunities, with your help, of course.”
“Simon feels terrible, and I do too. You have to understand—”
I clear my throat sharply. “About the assistantship?”
Cassian sighs heavily, but finally nods, letting the subject drop. “You’ll only be a sophomore. Most Fairhaven students don’t take assistantships until their junior or senior years. It’s not impossible, but it’s rare for sophomores to receive those positions. You’ll be competing with more experienced students, students who have had at least a year more training in magic than you have.”
“I believe I have proven that I’m willing to work hard, that I’m a capable mage with an appetite for learning.”
Cassian sighs. “I’ll look into it and see if any of your professors would consider your application, but I can’t promise anything.”
“I appreciate you looking into it. My preference would be a research or teaching assistantship. While I’ve learned a lot from Doctor Huong and appreciate her teachings greatly, I don’t wish to pursue the healing arts.”
I once wished to follow in my older siblings’ footsteps, to be deemed worthy enough for a job at Rose Pharmaceuticals, but I’ve long since realized that my family has no real interest in the healing arts.
If they did, my brother wouldn’t be worrying about the controversy a container of dead omegas could bring down on the company.
And I won’t learn anything more about what befell them if I don’t talk to Simon.
CHAPTER33
“As we celebrate the coming of spring, we also celebrate the waxing of the moon and the only true constant in the universe: change. You wouldn’t know it,” Headmaster Langford says, addressing the Lunar Ball attendees, “but spring has sprung here on Deer Island. Please, disregard the snow that blankets our campus on this first full moon of spring. For those of you who have not been with us long or perhaps have not been with us for quite some time, I assure you that snow on the Feast of Lunaria is practically a tradition.”
A few of the gathered alumni laugh politely and I peer around the ballroom. It’s resplendent, utterly transformed, an illusion of the full moon cast on the whole of the ceiling. The expansive room would be dark beneath the illusion of the night sky if not for the hundreds of warm, magical lights that float about the heads of the attendees. Students, alumni, and their packs fill the lavish space, everyone dressed in their finest, but I’m the only omega, mated or not, to be collared.
