The other alpha holds me tightly, whispering soothing nonsense in my ear, stroking my back, brushing the tears away from my cheeks.
I scramble out of his arms, suddenly feeling too exposed.
Naked and foolish.
Saints, these men have seen me at my most vulnerable, when I’ve been helpless under the haze of my heat.
And in their own ways, they’ve all lied to me.
I tug on a tee shirt and dig through my drawers for a clean pair of panties, but I stumble trying to pull them on.
Ian’s at my side in an instant, steadying me, but I pull away. I can’t bear to be touched, to be seen like I am now: a mess.
A wreck.
Naive, foolish omega that I am.
I finally turn back to him once I’ve pulled leggings on to see him tugging on his slacks.
Saints, what do you even say to the alpha who denied and resisted you until you needed him most? When something beautiful passed between you, tangled together in the mess of your nest at the peak of your heat?
“I’m sorry,” he says, shoving his hands in his pockets.
And all I can think to say is, “Me too.”
* * *
Luca doesn’t wantto leave me, but I beg for time alone and he finally relents, leaving me in my cottage with my honor guard and a pain too great to comprehend.
Marcus gives me my space and I lay on my back in my nest, the smell of pack and sex so strong it makes me want to weep. I curl into the duvet, breathing in Luca’s scent, nuzzle into the pillow that carries Ian bergamot and cedar. They’re comforts, but the greater comfort is that Simon had no scent to leave behind, at least nothing strong enough that it isn’t lost in scents and sex and slick.
No wonder I would catch all too familiar traces of sea-salt and summer sunshine in his dorm room. No wonder Simon called me something only Cassian ever called me.
Cassian.
I don’t know whether it hurts more or less to know that my young love is Simon’s alpha, that somehow both Cassian and I found our way to him. That we’ve kissed the same lips.
Cassian and I may have nothing in common but a past and a lover, but I don’t fault him for choosing someone else any longer. Because the moment I met him, I chose Simon Monroe too.
No, my heart doesn’t break for Cassian. It barely considers him.
It breaks because, once again, someone I love lied to me.
Is there any coming back from this?
Saints, Simon said I was the only woman—for himandhis alpha.
I could blame Simon for letting me fall, could lay all of this at his feet, but in truth, I’m the one that loved him still, looked past every single time he pulled away.
Every time it was too complicated to love me and his alpha.
* * *
I skipFriday’s classes and hide in my nest like the coward I am, not brave enough to face the problems I’ve made for myself.
When I do return to classes on Monday, I start the day on the wrong foot, oversleeping my alarm after tossing and turning half the night. I’m just about to dash out the door when I hear the thunk of something landing on my doorstep. Marcus lets out a warning growl, but by the time he gets to the peephole, there’s no one there.
And by the time he opens the door, all that lingers is the scent of anise and orange. A long, wide box sits on my doorstep, tied up with a silk ribbon.
