He sits in the stool across from me.
“Thank you,” I say.
“You’re welcome.”
I take a bite of the sandwich. It’s sliced vegetables and cheese with some salted meat. “This is delicious.”
“I perfected it after long training days when I was younger.”
“It was kind of the emperor to take you in. It must have been interesting living in the castle after being somewhere else your whole life,” I say.
“It was.”
What was Brevan the orphan like? How might his life have been different if he’d remained with his family, whoever they were. “Did you know right away that you wanted to join the Night Legion?”
“Shortly after I arrived. I thought it the best way for a boy with no family to make a place for himself. And to serve the emperor after all he did for me.”
“Are you happy with your choice?” I ask.
He finishes a bite of his sandwich. “Most days. But the more I experience, the more I realize that nobody truly gets a choice.”
I take a bite of my sandwich and chew slowly while I contemplate his words. I used to think we all made our own choices. That my mother chose to abandon our home and join the rebellion. But she left a town that had nothing left and needed to feed her children. What other options did she have?
When I look back on my own life, I see the path I’ve taken. So often I chose the route I thought I had to. There were few times I took the route I wanted.
“Maybe nobody gets to choose. There’s an illusion of options when we’re young, but I don’t think it even existed then.”
“I learned that younger than most by watching Caiden. If a prince doesn’t get that luxury, what chance do any of us have?” he says.
“What happened between you and Caiden?”
He chews, then puts down his sandwich. “After our gifting ceremonies, he was angry at me for the power I had. My magic was so destructive and dangerous. He thought his father had favored me and asked the gods to give me more.”
“He was jealous? I’ve seen his magic.” I rub my throat, then drop my hand. “It’s plenty strong.”
“It is,” he agrees.
“But yours was more powerful.” The flash of light plays in my mind. “And I haven’t seen it at its full strength, have I?”
“No, you haven’t,” he says.
“So the emperor bound your magic to make his son feel better?” That sounds insane, even for Caiden.
“I think he bound it because he was afraid of it. If I ever turned against him, or lost control, it would be catastrophic,” he says.
“You wouldn’t, though.” I don’t know why I’m so certain. This is the same man who has a reputation for destroying whole villages and killing without remorse. But the Brevan I’ve come to know doesn’t resemble the one I was warned about. How is it possible he could be such a monster?
“I might. I used it without considering any consequences twice since meeting you,” he says.
“And how often did you use it before me?” I ask, afraid of the answer.
“Since being bound?”
I nod.
“Never.”
My hands tremble and I move them to my lap so he can’t see. We’re walking a dangerous line here and I think we both know that. I need to change the subject.
