EIGHTEEN
GEMMA FELTLIKE SHE HADbeen caught in a tornado, swept up into the funnel, and flung in every direction. One minute, she and Caitlin had been at each other’s throats, old anger boiling over to scald each other. The next, Gemma had softened into putty, flooded with memories of how fiercely she had loved Caitlin.
A phantom of Caitlin’s lingering touch had heat rising to her skin. A shiver tore through her body as she relived the last hour in her trailer. The knowledge that she still turned Caitlin on made Gemma smile with self-satisfaction. And then there was the fact that Caitlin had been watching her. Well, watchingNYPDIntelligence, but to seeher. It wasn’t enough to absolve Cailtin of the rest of her sins, but it was endearing. Personally, Gemma had avoided every single one of Caitlin’s films. The accidental reveal that Caitlin hadn’t done the same ricocheted joy through her like a pinball.
Throughout all these years, Caitlin had still been Gemma’s cheerleader, rooting for her behind the scenes. But that didn’t explain why Caitlin had suddenly kissed her, or any of the things that followed. Had it just been a moment of weakness? Or maybe just a release of pent-up emotion? She couldn’t allowherself to believe that Caitlin actually wanted her back—she wouldn’t survive another heartbreak like that.
Gemma had never felt more disoriented in her life. On shaky legs, she slowly made her way toward the private set. Her heart felt heavy and unsure, but she forced her mind to look ahead, rather than back. Gemma needed to focus on making this scene perfect. Her job quite literally depended on it.
How hard could it be? They would only be pretending to have sex, the meticulous camera work would make it look convincing enough on screen. But she didn’t love the idea of sharing the intimacy between her and Caitlin with the rest of the world. It felt too real, too precious. But she couldn’t back out now.
Caitlin took her place on top of the thin white sheets, looking up and quickly spotting Gemma from across the room. Her face crinkled into a familiar smile, the one that made her cheeks rise until they kissed the corners of her blue eyes. She had always loved that particular smile, even before they had started dating. It comforted Gemma, releasing whatever anxiety she held within her. Since the first day of school, Caitlin had always protected her—from cruel cheerleaders, opportunistic boys, and even her own self on occasion. In that moment, she knew that Caitlin would take care of her once again.
Gemma stood on her mark in the doorway, poised to enter the bedroom where Caitlin was now reclining in the sheets. Gemma held her gaze and took a deep breath. The cameras began to roll, and the head of wardrobe removed their robes.
“Action!”
It’s just you and me, Caitlin’s subtle nod told Gemma.
With another small inhale and slow exhale, Gemma locked into the scene. She forced the production crew and their gear to dissolve into the background until only the two of them remained.
Steadier now, Gemma glided across the bedroom floor, watching as Caitlin’s eyes traced the lines of her body like a map. Her face lit up in a hungry grin, the same glint in her eyes now as before in the trailer. She felt her tension begin to melt, warmed with the relief of Caitlin’s undeniable attraction to her.
With a deliberate slowness, Gemma crawled across the bedspread on her hands and knees until her breasts were hovering a hairsbreadth above Caitlin. Their lips met in a blaze of desire as her skin connected with Caitlin’s for the second time that day. Gemma’s thigh slid up the bed and pressed between Caitlin’s legs. The line between fiction and reality began to blur until Gemma could no longer tell the difference.
The slight shift of a camera in her periphery snapped Gemma out of the moment, causing the world around them to rush back in all at once. Unsettled, her movements began to still. Was Caitlin still acting? Was she?
Caitlin caught the change in Gemma’s energy. She cupped her cheek gently, pulling Gemma’s attention back to her. Caitlin tenderly tucked a loose strand of hair behind Gemma’s ear. That’s when Gemma saw it, the twinkle in Caitlin’s crystal blue eyes. She had seen that spark before, and seeing it again now transported Gemma back into a different time. It was the same look that Caitlin had given her after their unexpected first kiss, right before their much-more-deliberate second kiss. Back then, Gemma had thought that it might even be a look of love.
On screen, moviegoers around the world would see Kate and Sarah making love for the first time. But underneath, the yearning and hunger belonged only to Gemma and Caitlin.
Gemma turned her face to kiss the inside of Caitlin’s palm, the delicate gesture lighting a flame that quickly spread like wildfire through their veins becoming a blaze of passion. Their kissing became frantic and eager, as if they were trying to make up for each year they had lost to loneliness. On instinct,Gemma’s hand drifted between Caitlin’s thighs before remembering the cameras. She bit back a curse, frustrated.
Sensing her annoyance, Caitlin flipped Gemma onto her back on the other side of the bed in a smooth roll, gearing up for the scene’s…climax. With a coy grin, Caitlin eased the sheet over their bodies, tucking it halfway, then slid down the bed between Gemma’s legs with a slow, expert grace.
Here, the audience would watch as Kate goes down on Sarah, made believable by Gemma’s soft moaning and grinding. Beneath the sheets, however, there was a professional protocol for such scenes. Caitlin kept her hands—and most frustratingly, her mouth—to herself as Gemma acted on her own, rolling her hips in a slow rhythm. Scripted or not, Gemma’s body ached for release, and she wanted Caitlin to give it to her. Again.
After a few more hip movements and a well-rehearsed orgasm from Gemma, Mrs. Ryan yelled, “Cut!”
Caitlin made her way out from under the sheet and laid her head on the pillow facing Gemma. “Are you okay?”
Gemma found Caitlin’s hand tucked under the pillow, lacing their fingers together. “Yes,” she whispered.
“That’s a wrap!” The director shouted, and a flurry of activity resumed around them, ending their private moment.
Gemma sighed and sat up, pulling her robe around her. The scene had gone perfectly, she already knew. Caitlin had been… wow. She had always known that Caitlin was a talented actress, but Kate’s love for Sarah had almost seemed real, even to Gemma.
Gemma, on the other hand, felt achingly raw. She had told Caitlin she was okay, but she wasn’t—not really. In a daze, she barely registered that Mrs. Ryan was approaching until she spoke.
“Now that’s what I wanted to see,” Mrs. Ryan exclaimed as she made her way toward them. “I don’t know what the hellyou two did on that lunch break, but thank you. That was... I can’t even put it into words. For a second, I honestly thought you two might be in love.” The director laughed at her own joke as her assistant handed her a script for the next scene.
Like a well-oiled machine, the crew scattered, already moving on to their next tasks.
AFTER THE WHIRLWIND OF SARAHand Kate’s sex scene, preceded by the real thing between her and Caitlin, Gemma could have cried with relief when Friday finally came. The week was over, and they had the weekend off, so she was hoping for time to process whatever the hell was going on.
She hadn’t gotten a chance to speak privately with Caitlin, but maybe that was for the best. Gemma couldn’t find the right words yet, needing to sort through the tangle of emotions before they spoke. Still, over the last few days, their on-screen chemistry had grown, and so had their… friendship?
Gemma didn’t know what to call it. But their dynamic felt comfortable in small, steady ways—reading lines together at lunch, trading easy stories about family, debating whether it was harder to work on a network television set or a movie one, and discovering that they still liked their old favorite ice cream flavors. Those shared moments had made the rest of it all feel slightly more endurable.
