“I just haven’t met the right woman yet.” That might have been part of the truth, but the other half of it was that Gemma hadn’t gotten over how badly she had been hurt. Anytime a woman got too close to her and showed signs of wanting to take things further than casual dating, she bailed. Her best friend was right. It didn’t matter how beautiful or kind the woman was, she just couldn’t let them entirely in.
“We’ll keep working on that. For now, you have me, and I love the crap out of you.” Hayley quickly placed her cup in the kitchen sink and kissed Gemma on the cheek. “I have to run to my first appointment, but we’re going out soon, so be ready. Have a good night at work and catch all the bad guys!”
After Hayley had closed the front door behind her, Gemma curled up on her worn beige couch. Pulling her knees into her chest under the soft terracotta blanket, her thoughts began to run in circles. Emergency sirens in the distance provided a soundtrack to match her chaotic mind. The truth was, she longed for that missing piece in her life—a woman she could fall deeply, wildly in love with. Someone to steal away on impromptu summer weekends by the beach, to hibernate with in a mountain cabin when the snow falls, and to spend quiet Sunday mornings beside reading pages that have nothing to dowith work. Someone who could not only tolerate her long days away, but who would celebrate her career. Someone she would get down on one knee for. Raise at least two children with. If her wife wanted more, she’d be open to driving a minivan full of kids to soccer practice one day. As an only child, Gemma had always yearned for a built-in best friend. She would give that to her kids.
At twenty-eight years old, Gemma’s life had become stagnant. Had she allowed her career to replace love? Could she be content withNYPD Intelligenceand Derek, continuing to live every day the same as the last?
With a shock, Gemma realized that her lust for life had slipped away in the past few years without her notice. She used to wake up feeling limitless, intent on experiencing every thrill that life had to offer. She wanted that spark back. She wanted tolive. She wasn’t sure what exactly that would look like yet, but she was determined to find out. After a long nap, of course. She had a murder to solve tonight.
TWO
CAITLIN WAS ON SET INLos Angeles, filming her new blockbuster movie at Warner Bros. Studios. The action movie,Ticket to Rio,also promised elements of romance and comedy. It would be the sequel to her previously successful film,Ticket to Tokyo.
Caitlin and her co-star, Brad King, had become the talk of Hollywood last year following the first release. As one might guess, their respective characters had fallen in love with each other while on an ill-fated adventure to save the world. It had soon become clear, however, that the whispers of an on-set romance had not just been rumors.
During their months of filming in Japan, the actors had developed an authentic relationship. After spending countless hours at work together and rehearsing lines late into the night, their friendship had begun to grow. Plus, at six foot two with a prominent eight-pack of abs, dark hair, and blue eyes, Brad wasn’t so bad to look at, either.
The highly anticipated sequel began filming in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, in October. After taking a break for the holidays and Caitlin’s twenty-ninth birthday, they were now back on set in California and nearing completion.
It was mid-March, and spring in LA was Caitlin’s favorite time of the year. The sun was shining, yet the temperature remained at a perfect seventy degrees. They had been stuck indoors working on a sound stage all week, but Caitlin had taken every opportunity to sneak out the side door for a moment in the fresh air that smelled of the new season, carrying the scents of blooming jasmine and citrus trees.
“That last scene was awesome, Cait,” Brad said as he perched his foot on the edge of a gray stone structure, leaning forward on his knee with his bicep bulging from his white tank top. “You looked hot when you jumped sideways to shoot that guy behind me.”
“Thanks, you were great too.” Caitlin swept her short auburn locks over her shoulder.
“I’ll let you ladies finish your lunch, see you in a bit.” Brad winked at Caitlin before he strutted away across the small patch of green grass.
“Oo, it’s gettin’ hot in here.” The woman seated next to Caitlin, eating her lunch on the iconic F.R.I.E.N.D.S. fountain, began to sing as she fanned herself.
Caitlin laughed. “Do you always have to speak in song lyrics?”
“Obviously, you already know the answer to that.” Maddie took a bite of her Uncle Paulie’s Italian cold cut sandwich. “It’s my love language.”
“Words of affirmation and Nelly lyrics are not the same.”
Maddie waved her hand at Caitlin, dismissing her. “Don’t try to change the subject. Brad definitely wants to get back together with you. Why aren’t you dating him again?” Her best friend had been utterly baffled when she broke up with Brad in the first place.
After Caitlin and Brad had been together for only seven months, she had called it quits. They had a shared attraction foreach other, and flirting was never in short supply. Their on-screen chemistry was undeniable, ultimately making them better coworkers than a couple. Caitlin hadn’t felt that spark. She hadn’t been in love with Brad, at least not in the way she had wanted. She had wanted to feel an obsession—a deep need to be together—and an ache whenever they were apart. But when she realized that she felt just as lonely in bed beside Brad as she did on the nights that he was away, Caitlin knew that her heart wasn’t in it.
“We’ve been over this.” Caitlin slouched. “I care about Brad. We’re good friends, but the relationship was all work, parties, and sex. That isn’t the future I want.”
“Screw the future.” Maddie threw her pile of napkins into the air. Actresses were so dramatic. “He’s cute, and he wants you. What more do you need?”
Caitlin was suddenly swept back in time as she thought about the one person that she compared all other relationshipsto. Her fixation on the past wasn’t healthy, her therapist continued to remind her, but Caitlin couldn’t help it. She knew that she had once experienced love in its truest form, and with that same level of certainty, she knew that she had not felt that adoration ever since. The inexplicable type of love that had made Caitlin add a small splash of oat vanilla creamer to her coffee every morning for years, even though she preferred to drink it black. After feelingthat, every other relationship had fallen short.
Caitlin had found herself drifting back in time more often recently. In her spare moments on set, her mind would wander back to the golden-brown eyes that had found her own on the first day of her sophomore year at Westmore High School. Those warm, defiant eyes had belonged to a girl with thick, straight, black hair swept and secured tightly in a ponytail, falling down her neck. She had smooth, tanned skin and a smile that melted Caitlin’s insides like an ice cube in the desert on a hot day. By the end of that school year, the lean, athletic figure of that girl would be flooding Caitlin’s teenage mind at the most inopportune moments. It had distracted her from many slow afternoon classes, turning her school notes into more doodles and song lyrics than the facts she should have been learning. She would smile softly, holding on to those innocent memories of her first love—the ones she’d long ago promised herself to never forget.
The pain of losing that love had dulled as time passed, along with the guilt that had tormented Caitlin after the breakup. That girl,hergirl, had now become a woman, a stranger on the other side of the country. But Caitlin still held space in her heart for who they had been together during their teenage years—daring, bold, and pure. She had cut off contact after the split, needing air to let the wounds heal, but Caitlin had not been able to stop herself from watching every singleNYPD Intelligenceepisode as they aired. The show had been her weakness, a visceral reminder of what she had lost. These days, however, it no longer felt like torture to watch the detective squad solve New York’s fictional crimes.
“I don’t want erratic nights of drinking and one-night stands anymore, Mads. I want someone I can share my life with.”
“Pfft. We’ve been best friends since you moved here nine years ago, so I know for a fact that you have definitely not taken advantage of being hot, rich, and famous. You could be out there getting anyone you want. You have your whole life to settle down, but you’re only young once.”
Clichéd or not, Maddie was right. Caitlin had moved to LA and thrown herself into her career. And Maddie would know. She had been the first person Caitlin met after arriving in California when she landed a role starring in a new romanticcomedy calledPlan C, prompting her to make the move across the country from where she had grown up in Pennsylvania.
After Caitlin signed with her agent, Sandy, immediately following her securing a part in her first movie, Sandy suggested that she meet with another client who was looking for a roommate. And since Caitlin had nowhere to live, she met Maddie for a drink, and the second they started talking, they realized how much they had in common. They were two bright-eyed actresses trying to find their way in Hollywood, connecting them on a level that not many could understand. More than that, however, they had discovered their shared joy for partying, binge-watching crime TV shows, and sleeping in on their days off. They were both fiercely loyal to the people they loved. Most importantly, they were both hopeless romantics, daydreaming of their future wives even while they reveled in the fun of Hollywood.
Maddie was a year and a half younger than her, and even though that wasn’t much of an age gap, Caitlin had quickly assumed the role of the protective older sister. Though Maddie was blonder, bubblier, and slightly shorter than Caitlin, the two became one unit. Nine times out of ten, you wouldn’t see one woman without the other. And when Caitlin’s career took off afterPlan C’senormous success, Maddie’s career hadn’t been far behind. Caitlin had gotten her best friend a role in every movie that she starred in, includingTicket to RioandTicket to Tokyo. Maddie played the same leading villain in both, returning for revenge in the film that they were currently shooting.
