“By killing me?” I snapped. “You’re insane.”
Think of all the pain it would have prevented.She smiled.Is this really worth it to you? How much do you want this? Be honest.
I was quiet.
Some people are willing to die for the people and things they love. And some people aren’t. There’s no shame in being the latter.
Below, Gavin swung down another few feet. I looked up—up into the hovering tiers of spectators above, their wide blotchy faces impossible to make out in the silvery glow. But somewhere, my people were there. Watching, cheering me on, hoping I’d win. Not just this Ordeal, but this competition—the crown, the throne, everything. Because they believed in me—they believed in my dream of an impossible world, my dream of a world just a little more radiant than our own.
Dowser, who’d fought addiction for me.
Lullaby, who survived weeks in a dungeon for me.
Thibo, who wasgonebecause of me.
Oleander, who offered her hated legacy to me.
Sunder—oh, Sunder, who I’d caused so much pain and given nothing in return—who loved me, even if he hated these Ordeals.
I choked on a sob.
Nothing worth having is ever given, Severine said.
Below, Gavin’s foot touched stone.
It must be taken, she hissed.
“No.” I turned my back on the mirror, turned my back on Severine. “It must beearned.”
I took three giant steps back. I turned on my heel, and started to run. I leapt.
Mirror glass shattered into dristic stars. Noise exploded around me, and for a moment I was weightless. Buoyant. I could sail through this night and never meet another day. But then I fell, plummeting like Meridian through a riot of sound and color and ecstatic fear.
I landed on the dais with an impact that shredded my senses. For a dizzy moment I felt nothing. Then pain blazed along my bones. A roar forced my eyes open.
Relic.
I dragged myself along the ridge of stone, stretching useless fingers toward an austere blade. It did not leap to my hand. I curled fingers around its blade and dredged it from its hollow, slicing my hand open.
If the crowds cheered, the ringing in my ears drowned it out. Slowly—excruciatingly—I climbed to my feet. My left leg howled, and nearly gave out. A shard of bone pierced the skin. I reeled—staggered—balanced. I lifted the Relic. Blood slipped from my palm and painted runnels along the blade. The light turned the metal molten.
I must have collapsed. The next thing I knew, someone was prying the sharp blade out of my hand, and strong hands were lifting me up and arms were wrapped around me and people were shouting too loudly.
Then blackness rushed in and I knew—I had earned that too.
Iwas dragged unceremoniously awake by loud arguing.
“Youdid this,” said a voice like wolves. “If you hadn’t cheated in the first Ordeal she never would have gone so far—”
“Cheated?!”A bell of outrage sang out. “I never cheated, not even when—”
“That’s not the point!” someone else bellowed. “We can all agree it’s gone too far—”
I opened my eyes, or tried to. They were tight and crusted, and the low red light felt like knives. I struggled to sit up, but pain flared the length of my body. I gasped and fisted my hands in the blankets, my body rebelling against consciousness.
“She’s awake.” A girl’s figure swam into view.Vida. Cool hands on my shoulders guided me back onto the mattress. She pressed a warm mug into my free hand. “Drink this.”
I obeyed. The bitter liquid burned a path down my throat before blooming hot in my chest. My pain faded away, replaced with a numb throb. A pain potion, then.
