“What do you want, then?” I asked, though I already knew, for he had said it many times.
Me.
He wanted me.
Even though that made no sense. Maybe now that he was speaking freely, he would finally be honest.
And maybe, with the return of his memories, hewould finally come to his senses and realize that I was absolutely nothing to him. Less than nothing.
His eyes flicked up, meeting my gaze, capturing me entirely.
“I am beginning to learn that I want many things.”
“Like?” I squeaked. I cleared my throat awkwardly.
“Like…” He trailed off, his eyes dropping back down to his darkened fingers. He ran his thumb along his blunt fingernails almost absentmindedly. “A home, for one.”
This surprised me. My eyebrows shot to my hairline. “A home? I didn’t take you for the sentimental type.”
“Everyone here in this town, you all…belong.” He swallowed, his throat bobbing. “I want to know how that feels.”
I shoveled another scoop of eggs into my mouth to spare myself a few seconds from responding.
This enigmatic, mysterious, unfathomably powerfulgodjust wanted to feel like he belonged.
I suddenly felt prickling at the backs of my eyes, tightening in my throat.
I knew exactly how he felt, and that thought had me torn between wanting to burst into tears and throw my arms around Shade’s shoulders.
He continued, sparing me from speaking. “Like you. You fit here like a blade of grass in a meadow—like you were grown here just like everyone else.”
I froze. My eyes jumped to his face of their own accord. He was watching me, his expression open and earnest. He wasn’t lying to me.
I forced out a dismissive snort. He couldn’t tell just how close to the edge of crumbling I truly was. “It just seems that way because I’m the one serving everyone alcohol.”
He shook his head. A lock of hair dropped over his scarred eye, briefly hiding it from my view before he tucked it back into place. “You don’t see yourself the way everyone else does, Ginger. These folk revolve around you naturally. You all drift together, move together, take care of each other. It’s a family. And you’re at the heart of it.”
Warmth flooded my cheeks. Shade was just a stranger. An outsider. He didn’t know what he was talking about.
But… he wasn’t an outsider. Not exactly. Not anymore.
He had clung to the edges of society, but he had remained in Moonvale for weeks. He had gotten himself declared Mister Moonvale. And though he didn’t seem to interact with many folk, he clearly paid attention.
Maybe he wasn’t too far off.
I was used to being the backup friend. An acquaintance. The second choice. And most of the time, I was fine with that.
But other times, it ate at me.
A secret, selfish part of me wanted to be important—wanted to be the center of attention, for once. The object of someone’s focus.
Maybe that’s why Shade was able to slowly slip shadowy tendrils further and further under my skin…
“I’m right, aren’t I?” Shade asked with a small, pleased smile.
“No,” I said quickly. Defensively. I wasn’t sure why my hackles were raised, but I couldn’t force them back down.
He nodded once, not calling me out on the lie. “Okay. I hope that one day you will see.”
