His absence dug under my skin in a way I didn’t expect it to. It needled between my muscles, through my bones, into my marrow. It ate at me in a way I couldn’t shake.
Why hadn’t he said goodbye?
I couldn’t even write him a letter to find out, as I didn’t know where he went. I supposed I could send a letter to his previous town in Sunhaven, but I had no way to know if he would be back there any time soon or if he was simply continuing his journey across the realm.
The dark cloud I had begun to escape settled back over my head, making everything seem just a bit greyer.
CHAPTER 32
Redd
My brain had become a bubbling cauldron.
I couldn’t drag my mind away from worrying. Constant worrying. I dwelled on thoughts about my family, thoughts about this town, thoughts about a temperamental vampire.
Thoughts about a searing kiss that had ended too abruptly. Way too abruptly.
I kept analyzing my Ma’s last letter over and over in my mind. It was so… wrong. Something about it was off. After tormenting myself for a few days, I couldn’t take it anymore.
I wasn’t proud of the way I had left home, and that small wound had festered over the weeks, growing and growing until it was an ache I could no longer ignore. Something needed to be done.
I let Mayor Tommins know that I had to leave, and that I didn’t know when I’d be back. What I didn’t tell him was that I also didn’t knowifI’d be coming back.
I gathered my meager belongings and set out on my journey, leaving the key to my rental cottage tucked under a stone by the front door. If someone looked, they would eventually find it. I had paid enough silvers to the cottage owner that I had afew weeks to spare before they came seeking more payment or confirmed my absence.
I convinced myself that Fiella would be relieved to have me gone. Her strange rejection had left my mind reeling and my ego bruised. I didn’t know what I did wrong. Everything had been going so well, we had been getting along soperfectly, and her body fit in my hands like it was made to be there.
I didn’t know what had gone wrong.
All I knew was that I needed to get out of here. To get some space, and some clarity, and to finally set my mind at ease about what was going on back home in Sunhaven.
I felt a stab of regret that I hadn’t told Fiella that I was leaving, but the desire not to bother her any more than I already had outweighed it.
The stables in Moonvale were pathetic. There was only one mule fit for the journey, and fit was an understatement. The stablemaster had explained that they would refill when tourists arrived with more critters, but for now, this was my only option beside traveling on foot.
I sighed as I handed over my silvers. This was going to be a long, miserable trip.
It had been weeks since I had been in the arid atmosphere of Sunhaven, and I had almost forgotten the way the air itself enveloped me in a warm cocoon. Moonvale had surprisingly become familiar, and I was beginning to acclimate to the cold.
I was covered in a thin layer of sweat and uncomfortably warm. I loosened the laces of my tunic at my throat so I could let the air kiss my skin.
It seemed like nothing had changed in the weeks since I had left. The streets were as lively as ever, the sparse, stringy trees were as yellow as they had always been, the lizards scurrying across the path were zig zagging beneath my feet in the same patterns they always had.
My family’s shop looked the exact same as well. It was still standing, the shingles on the roof still bright orange and hideous. I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding for what felt like weeks, the tension in my chest easing a fraction. I hadn’t realized the fear that I had been holding onto was impacting me so deeply.
I had never been away from my family for longer than a few days, and the fact that they were able to carry on without me gave me mixed feelings. I was proud of them, but I was sad for myself. Maybe I wasn’t so essential after all.
I strolled into the shop as though I had never left. It was the middle of the day, and I knew that some project would be in the works.
“Ma! Pa! It’s me, Redd!” I called out as I entered, assuming one of my parents would be lingering in the vicinity as they usually did. The voice that answered me wasn’t my parents, though–it was my younger brother Ollie.
“Redd? What in the Hell’s Realm are you doing here!” he called out as he barreled around the corner and threw his body into my arms. I caught him with a grunt of effort and hugged him back. I had missed the casual affection of my family.
“I told you guys I wouldn’t be gone forever,” I grumbled into his fluffy head of hair. “I had to come back and visit. How are things? Where are Ma and Pa?”
Ollie extracted himself from my arms and looked into my face, examining me with an intensity I wasn’t used to seeing in my lighthearted and free-spirited younger brother. He was barely considered an adult, and he often still acted like a little.
“They’re back at home,” he stated cautiously. He gnawed at his lower lip, his fangs almost pricking the skin. My hackles rose.
