I slam the mental door in my mother’s face, trying to cut off her words before they can take root in my mind. I sit there with my hands trembling in my lap, my eyes trained on the fading bruises around my shaking wrists. I look at Garrick, avoiding Creed’s stare.
“I—I want to get better.” I swallow past the thick lump in my throat. “I think… I need to go.”
Collins rubs my back in comforting circles, but I can feel the heartache and fear radiating off of her and Creed.
“Alright,” Garrick hedges, then looks to Pippa. “Is he allowed any form of communication with those on the outside?”
She straightens and turns to him. “The facility doesn’t allow the use of cellphones, b-but we do have a program where he can receive weekly letters from loved ones for encouragement,” she quickly supplies, and immediately Collins perks up.
“What?” I ask, but then it hits me at the same moment that the sweetest, most excited smile breaks out across her face.
“Letters and Polaroids.” She giggles, but it gets lost in the rasp of her voice. “NowthatI can do.”
My heart thumps wildly in my chest with excitement at the thought of getting my very own letters from Collins. Suddenly, the idea of therapy doesn’t seem so bad.
The road to recovery is going to suck, not gonna lie, but now that I have something to look forward to until I can actually go home? Maybe it won’t be so bad after all.
Chapter 19
Creed
“WHATEVER YOU ASK OF ME, I’LL DO IT.”
“Oh, my God,” Riley laughs as he pulls a compact Polaroid camera from a bright blue gift bag. “Is this for me, Snow?”
She holds up her own and gives it a wiggle. “Wellduh, silly.” I watch the two of them from the back seat of Dad’s car as they lean into one another. She’s showing him how to load the film and replace the empty cartridges.
When he made the decision to go, it was the first time I’d struggled to agree with him on something. I didn’t want to let him go. But it’s what he wants, and I’ll be damned if I don’t support him through it. Collins and I had stepped out of the room long enough for the doc to look him over one last time and that’s where she and I hatched the plan to get him a camera, too. We still had a few hours before he was to be released, so I slipped out to the store. I sent Collins dozens of pictures of all the options before she settled on the one she wanted to gift to him.
I wanted to get him a big camera just like hers, but it made sense to get the smaller one while his hands are still unsteady.
The doc said it could be temporary nerve damage with how tightly his hands were restrained that’s causing the trembling, and the lack of grip strength comes from the gunshot wound.
My boy is so fucking worried that if by some horrible chance he can’t drum again, we’ll just chuck him and leave him. It only makes me hate his asshole mother that much more. That bitch is entirely at fault for taking such a perfect, sweet human and corrupting his mind to believe that anyone besides her could ever abandon him.
My love for Riley had begun to shift before all this shit went down, but my feelings haven’t changed in that time. There’s really no denying that I’m head over heels for both Collins and Riley. Deeply, madly, irrevocably obsessed with them, if you will.
The moment Collins gets the camera ready, she holds it out to face us, and we all chuckle before leaning in and smiling. The flash goes off, the camera whirs, and the picture slowly ejects. I pull it from the top and set it in my lap while it develops.
“Here,” I mutter, trying to avoid my dad’s glances in the rear view mirror as I pick up the bright green bag from between my feet and hand it to Riley. It’s not like my father is judging me, but he’ll absolutely embarrass me by saying something ridiculously cheesy if I even dare to make eye contact. “This one’s from me.”
I keep having these mini flashbacks of watching the grainy recordings Asher had taken of Collins opening her gifts from us before we unintentionally left her completely on her own, setting off the sequence of events that had thrown her already rocky childhood into complete turmoil.
Riley’s sweet, deep brown eyes meet mine. He looks a little confused before he just smiles and tears into the tissue paper that Collins had stuffed into the top of the bag.
He and Collins both bark out a laugh when they see the candy-themed stationary set, complete with wax seals that look like M&M’s.
I pull my own all-black set from my bag and hold it up to them. I’m smiling like a lovesick fool when I lean into Riley and whisper in his ear, “Now I can write the two of you all the dirty love notes I want.” I nuzzle his neck and chuckle into his skin when his breath hitches and goosebumps bloom across his freckled shoulder. “Tell you everything I can’t wait to try with you as soon as you get home and are ready.”
I place a small kiss just below his ear. “All three of us.”Kiss.“The two of you.”Kiss.“And the two of us.”
Dad clears his throat, and when I pull back, I love how Riley is as red as a tomato while Collins is practically panting, her pupils completely blown out with lust.
“Jesus fuck, we’re here,” Dad snaps and all but bolts from the car like his ass is on fire.
“God I can’t wait for that,” Collins whispers, and I chuckle, but it quickly fades when my eyes turn toward the stale-colored building before us.
I have half a mind to shove him back into Dad’s car and take him home as I open the door and move to let him out.
