I nod, wiping my face. “Sorry, I fell apart on you.”
“That’s totally fine. Don’t worry. Though, me and Danger are gonna have some strong fucking words.”
“Don’t even worry. If he wants Effa, she can have him. Let’s be honest. This was never going to work anyway.”
He screws up his face like he hates that idea. “Want me to get you a cab?”
Ryan wraps his arm around my shoulders after I nod, and then he walks with me to the front of the hotel.
“Can you let my mum know I’ll meet her at the airport and to bring my stuff?”
He leans in to kiss my cheek. “Yes. Shit, I’m so sorry, Lunar.”
“Me too. I loved hanging with you guys. Honestly, it’s been the best time of my life.”
“We loved having you around. Don’t lose contact, okay?” He knows my words are final as he waves his hand to the passing cab. “I’m gonna miss you.”
I clear my throat to stop myself from bursting into tears again. “I’ll miss you, too, Ryan, and I hope you find that happiness you deserve.”
The cab pulls up, and I open the back door.
Turning, I kiss Ryan’s cheek. “Thank you. Thanks for everything.”
His eyes are somber as I slide into the back of the cab. He closes the door for me, and I glance up at him one last time, my palm pressed to the window as the car pulls away.
Away from Recoil.
Away from Danger.
For the very last time.
And the pain sears into me like nothing I have ever felt before.
Chapter Twenty-Five
DANGER
“Out!” I yell, pushing Effa toward the door.
Effa grabs her shoes with a sigh. “Geez, dude, someone woke up cranky and hungover this morning.”
“Yeah, well, you just slept through my girl walking in on you asleep in bed with me so…” I trail off.
Effa screws up her face. “Oooh… that’s not good.”
“No, Effa. That isnotgood. Now get out!”
“Okay, but wait till I leave before you Hulk smash everything,” she teases.
I don’t find her jokes amusing right now. “Get.Out!”
“Fine!” She yanks open the hotel room door and walks out.
I stomp back to the bedroom, my anger boiling over. Without a second thought, I grab the nearest thing—a lamp—and hurl it across the room with an almighty bellow. The cord snaps as it’s torn from the wall, taking chunks of the plasterboard with it. The lampshade shatters, breaking into tiny glass fragments against the opposite wall. Breathing heavily through my nostrils, I sound like a raging bull, my chest heaving from the tension.
That didn’t make me feel any better, but it did relieve some tension.
I pace the floor, wondering how I could have fucked up this huge. Walking over to my shirt on the couch, I pull it on and go in search of Nate.
