Scott winces and puts his hand on my shoulder in a comforting manner. “If it’s any consolation, she’s definitely not happy.”
“Thanks for trying. Thanks for going to all that trouble and trying to have her call me.”
He winces again. “I’m sorry it didn’t work. I tried, I really did. She wouldn’t budge. Alex is a fucking feisty little thing.”
I let out a half-laugh. “Yeah, I know.”
“You gonna be okay?”
“No… not even a little bit, but what can I do? I have no choice, do I? Gotta pull up my panties and get on with life now, I suppose.”
My phone dings, and my chest squeezes in the hope that it’s Alex and she’s changed her mind. I grab it and look down at a message from Charlotte. I sigh and put my cell back in my pocket.
“Matt, I believe everything happens for a reason. I’m not sure why Alex has turned you down, but getting a message from Charlotte right now… I’d take that as a sign.” Scott slaps my shoulder and turns, walking away.
I raise my brow and tilt my head. I guess the saying‘when one door closes, another opens’is true. But I’m not sure, given my history with internet dating, whether I should pursue anything with Charlotte. Sure, I’ve been talking to her, but I’ve also had this thing with Alex blow up in my face. I need to calm the fuck down and take each day as it comes for a little while. Honestly, thinking about throwing Charlotte into the mix so soon after Alex is more than daunting.
All I can think about is Alex.
But she doesn’t want me.
She’s made that painfully clear.
So maybe I need to do what she’s apparently doing and move the hell on.
Fuck my life!
Chapter Twenty-Eight
MATT
It’s been a week, a solid week, without Alex in my life.
I haven’t tried to call or message her. I have looked a few times to see if she’s checked the text messages I’ve sent previously, but she hasn’t. And even though I did finally admit to myself the feelings I’m pretty sure I have for her, it’s too late now, and she’s out of my life. I know we weren’t a couple, but this sure-as-shit feels like a breakup. I know we were only together that one time, but emotionally, I think we were more like a couple for longer than I realized.
I miss her so much.
And being Tuesday today, it’s hitting me hard that I’m going to be spending another night without her. Tuesdays were our day, it was our thing, and now I can’t even watch a Taco Bell ad without wanting to throw the remote at the television.
I’ve been asking Nate how she’s doing, but he won’t tell me much. He hates being stuck in the middle. But what he has told me is she’s basically working hard and keeping to herself. Alex isn’t hanging around him as much, and he thinks it’s because he reminds her of me, and it’s shit that I’ve hurt their friendship too.
My actions aren’t only affecting me—they’re affecting my friends, my family, and the people I love.
I wish there were something I could do to make Alex feel better, but the only thing I think might work is time and distance. And I’m giving her that. As much as I hate it, I’m giving her the space she needs from me, though it’s killing me a little more every day.
It’s getting close to six thirty, and I know that’s the time Alex would be arriving home and when we’d usually be starting our Taco Tuesday.
Unable to do anything remotely close to ourMalexroutine, I pull out a bag of M&Ms and nibble on them, aimlessly watching my cell, wondering if tonight might be the night she’ll give in and call. Just the thought of ourshipcelebrity name has my chest squeezing.
When my phone suddenly beeps, I glance down, full of hope, then sigh when I notice it’s Charlotte.
Sinking further into the sofa, I click open to read her message.
Charlotte:Hey, hope your night’s going okay. I’ve been thinking of you today. I know you’re sad about the fight with your friend, but I’m here if you need to talk.
I sigh. Charlotte’s been good the last week. I figured I wasn’t going to make the same mistake with her that I made with Madeline and not tell Charlotte about Alex. However, I haven’t told Charlotte the full extent about Alex. I told her that we were best friends, we’d had a falling out, and that I’d been having a hard time without her. Charlotte is being supportive about it all, which is nice. It’s been good to have someone to talk to, especially someone with an unbiased opinion.
Me:Thank you. That’s nice of you. It’s great to have a friendly ear…
