I am left alone in the scrub room. The silence is deafening.
I look at my hands. They are clean. They are sterile.
And they are about to destroy the only person I have ever loved.
Chapter 14
The Betrayal
Maxwell
Twenty minutes later, I am in OR 1.
I am operating on a mitral valve. My hands are moving. I am giving orders."Suction. Clamp. Suture."
But I am not in the room.
My mind is racing, looking for a loophole, a strategy, a way out. I think about Alistair. Can he stop the licensing board? No. The scandal would be too messy. He would cut Jax loose to save the family name.
I think about fighting Sterling. But the photos exist. The relationship exists.
There is no way out. The trap is perfect.
Jax walks into the OR.
He is scrubbing in late to assist. He pushes through the door, mask on, eyes bright above the blue fabric. He sees me and winks.
"Sorry I'm late, Chief," he says, his voice cheerful. "Traffic in the hallway. Ortho guys were arguing abouta fracture."
He steps up to the table. He stands opposite me.
"How’s the valve looking?" he asks, reaching for a retractor.
I look at him. I see the trust in his eyes. I see the memory of him making me coffee in the middle of the night. I see the man who saved me from my own loneliness.
He is a liability.
The thought crashes into me. Not because he is messy, or loud, or chaotic. But because he is vulnerable. And as long as he is with me, he is a target.
I have to sever the limb to save the patient.
"Dr. O'Connell," I say. My voice is ice. It is the voice of the Chief. "You are late."
Jax pauses. He hears the tone. "Yeah, like I said, the Ortho guys?—"
"I do not care about the Ortho department," I snap. "I care about the schedule. Your tardiness is unacceptable."
The room goes quiet. The scrub nurse looks up, surprised. Jax blinks.
"Max?" he whispers.
"Dr. York," I correct him. "And your retraction is sloppy. Tighten the exposure."
"I... okay." Jax adjusts his grip. He looks confused, like a dog that’s been kicked by its owner. "Better?"
"No," I say. "Incompetent."
I look up at the gallery. Sterling isn't there, but his spies are everywhere. The scrub nurse. The anesthesiologist. I have to make it real.
