“I’m going to be away until Monday, but if you need anything, just text me or call. Okay?”
“Okay.” Now I learn that he’s going to be away, my heart sinks again. I’m annoyed that I’m so fragile right now and could do with his company. I take a deep breath. I’ve managed without him for twenty years, a few more days can’t hurt. But that was before. Now I feel as though I might drown without him.
“I’m going to miss you,” I mumble.
He kisses me gently. “I’m going to miss you too, baby. I’m finding it harder to be apart from you.”
Baby.
The term of endearment slips out so naturally, pulling the edges of my wounded heart back together and helping to banish the fears.
“You called me baby,” I whisper.
“Hmmm, because you are. We’re going to be great together, baby. I promise.”
He kisses me again, sealing the pledge onto my lips and soul. After several more long kisses he finally leaves, and then only because a customer enters who needs my attention. A few minutes later I feel my phone buzz in my pocket, and when I get a chance to look at it I see what he’s sent.
Miss you baby
It fills my heart with a warmth that carries me through the rest of my day.
I’m pleased when it’s closing time and I can go home. While I am now filled with hope instead of fear, my emotions are tauter than a tightrope and I’m exhausted.
When I reach home, I find Clara on my doorstep. I’d forgotten she was coming round tonight. I open my door and she follows me in.
“Wow, what happened to you?” she asks, looking at me intently, her face darkening. “Did he hurt you again? Because if he did, I swear I will kill him.”
“I think I’m in love,” I say and burst into tears. I know it’s a reaction to exhaustion and the roller coaster of emotions, but now I’ve opened the floodgates I can’t stop. She guides me into the living room and sits me on the couch. She doesn’t say anything, just pressing her knee against me in silent support and handing me tissues. Eventually the tears subside, and I dry my eyes and stop snivelling.
“Tell me everything,” she prompts and I talk. I tell her about the date, including his mom’s involvement, how elated I feltafterward and then how I was waiting for the bubble to burst. About how caring Reece is, and finally that he called me baby.
“Ah,” she says sagely.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“How did it feel when he said it?”
“It felt like I was special.”
“That’s because you are special, Holden, and I’m glad he sees that and I don’t have to go round and knock some sense into the guy.”
I snort. “You’d do that?”
She shrugs and gives me a grin that’s all teeth, and I almost believe she would. I smile back at her. She’s a good friend.
“So you’ve got it bad, eh?” she asks, and I sigh deeply in answer. She just chuckles. “You know what you need, don’t you?”
“What?”
“A gallon of ice cream and a movie. Stay right there.” She launches herself off the couch and into the kitchen. I hear her opening the freezer, all the while humming “Love is in the Air.” I laugh to myself as I know what movie she’s going to choose. Sure enough she hands me a tub of my favorite ice cream—mint choc chip—and puts onStrictly Ballroom. It’s the perfect film and I’m already starting to feel more settled.
By the time we’ve finished the film and half the ice cream my emotions are on an even keel again. I hug her tight when she leaves and thank her.
I climb into bed and send a text to Reece.
Going to sleep now, but thinking of you.
Me too baby, sleep tight.
