“I had to,” he says, sounding almost as distressed. “Please. Please tell me where you are, and I’ll explain everything.”
“And you’ll bring Indigo with you to finish us off?”
I expect him to deny it, but all he says is, “I can control him. You don’t have to worry.”
Worry? I glance at Jasper. He doesn’t have much time left. Vee’s watching us both with deep concern, and I regret not getting her involved sooner. Like four years ago, apparently. Iwas so caught up in grief and Ezekiel’s lies that we were going to change the world that I didn’t notice when my blind date turned into an Olympic event. Vee would have smelled a rat from the beginning.
“I’ll come to you,” I say. “Meet me at the lab. With Mother.”
That he doesn’t ask for more information or feign shock says exactly how much he really knows. All he says is, “Yes. Yes, thank you. Please come. I’ll see you there soon.”
My hands shake as I hang up.
“What do you mean, ‘with Mother’?” Vee asks.
I bury my face in my hands. How is this my life? I thought it was bad before when I was somehow both an epic failure and a guardian for one of the most powerful secrets in the world. This is a zillion times worse.
Jasper staggers up his chair, though he has to hold on to the back for support.
“Let’s go,” he says.
I shake my head. “No. You stay here with Vee.”
They both protest, but they’re not going to change my mind.
“Jasper, you’re dying. Again.”
“What do you mean ‘again’?” Vee asks, voice echoing off the freezer walls with frustration. “What’s with all the cryptic covert bullshit? Will one of you please tell me what’s going on?”
“Jasper can,” I say, but he stumbles forward, grabbing at my wrist.
“You can’t go see him. What if it’s a trap?”
“Oh, it’s a hundred percent a trap,” I say, giving him a rueful smile. “But what’s he going to do? Kill me for the twelve-hundredth night in a row?”
Vee makes a truly aggravated noise. If I survive, I’ll be apologizing to her for a long time.
But Jasper only holds on tighter. “If Ezekiel is responsible for the loop, that means he also knows how to stop it. He could killyou and then...” He trails off, but the fear in his eyes is clear, and I don’t need to hear the words to know where he was going. This could be it. Ezekiel could trap me, stop the loop, kill me one last time, and that would be the end. No more dates. No more arguments. No more Jasper.
I kiss him. I try to put every feeling, every promise, every apology into it. We wasted so much time, most of it without ever knowing what was happening. I chose bickering over being with him. If this is all we have, I want this last moment to be everything we could have been.
“Don’t forget about me,” I say, resting my cheek against his. He holds me close. His breathing is raspy on my neck. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” he says desperately. “Whatever happens, I’ll be waiting for you. Come find me.”
I will. Whether it’s at Wench or the big diner in the sky, we are owed some time to ourselves.
Vee walks me back upstairs and to the door.
“I can go with you,” she says. “Your mom would be pissed that you’re going alone.”
I shake her hand, letting a little frost build up between us. She gasps as she stares down.
“I’m not as defenseless as I used to be,” I say, giving her what I hope is a confident smile, even though I feel anything but. “And this is how it works, right? The hero and the villain, facing off one last time.” I was never much of a hero, but I know how the game is played.
She hugs me, her embrace tighter than Jasper’s.
“Farah would have been so proud.”
