What the fuck just happend?
Mind whirling, I head the opposite way to the front of the house. Shoving my hands into my pocket, I pull out my pack of cigarettes.
Placing the butt between my lips, I light it up and inhale deeply. My eyes roll back and I moan as the smoke fills my lungs.
It’s an unhealthy habit, one I only do when I’m stressed or overwhelmed. Unfortunately, that's been a lot these days.
Leaning against the side of the house, nuzzled away in the dark, I enjoy the quiet of late January air. It doesn’t last long before the reality of what just happened settles in.
The facts are, they are my alphas. Not just any alphas, my scent matches.
I can continue to fight it, but I know there's no use.
They want me and they’re not going to let anything stop them.
The biggest reason why I was fighting this bond in the first place wasn’t only because of their age, because these men are well beyond their years, or the fact they are my students because there are rules put into place because of situations like this.
It was because they came off as dominant cocky young alphas. The kind that wanted a submissive omega to play with, to please them.
And that’s not me.
Jamie just proved me wrong. Because he had no issue getting on his knees and letting me fuck his face until I shattered above him.
He submitted to me. And fuck me if that wasn’t one of the hottest moments of my life.
Is there a chance that maybe this could work out if the others are willing to submit to me sexually like Jamie?
Are the other two switches, or are they firmly tops?
Fuck. These are things I should really be talking to them about.
Why does the idea of sitting down with these twenty-one year olds to talk about sex feel weird? I’m a thirty-five year old man, I’ve been having sex for over fifteen years. I’m nowhere near some blushing virgin.
But Jamie was the first alpha I’ve been with… willingly.
And what made it better was seeing an alpha on his knees, being used and loving every moment of it.
I’m starting to think these guys are not like the average alphas.
This was just one incident. I’m not going to let it make my decision about them. We’ll see if this is just a way to rope me into being theirs, or if they actually mean it.
As I stomp out my cigarette and head back inside, I’ve decided that while I’m not going to jump into this relationship with them, I will stop running and let things progress naturally.
If I do this with a clear head, I’ll be able to see the signs if things are going to go bad and get out of the situation without putting myself in a vulnerable position.
If I run, I’ll probably be single forever because I know I would never be able to be with another person after finding my scent matches. The idea of being single and alone forever fills me with dread.
I’m tired of running, tired of going through life alone.
When I get inside, instead of going back to the party, I head towards the stairs, ready to just call it a night. The past week has been pure hell and I haven’t been able to get any sleep.
Maybe now that I don’t have to worry as much, I can actually get a good night's sleep.
“Leaving the party so soon?” The sound of Ralph’s voice from behind me makes my spine stiffen and my heart race, not in a good way.
Ignoring him, I force myself to keep going, heading up the steps.
Unfortunately, Ralph doesn’t take the hint, following after me.
