He didn’t look back, which made my stomach gripe with uneasiness.
You can’t have it both ways, Ally.
I only realised when I arrived at my villa that I never told him not to come. I’d have to send him away face to face.Wonderful.
I toed off my sneakers, leaving them in the entry, and crossed to the minibar where I poured two fat fingers of Metaxa, a Greek brandy. I lowered myself onto the sofa, half reclining, and sipped.
What the hell was I doing –besidesplaying with fire?
Claude would have my head if she discovered I was spending time with Tommy – let aloneenjoyingit. As if those countless tearful nights she’d stayed up with me, helping me recover from the Tommy-shaped void, had never happened.
My phone rang, startling me, and I jumped up to dig it out of my backpack. Claude.
Had I somehow summoned her too? If so, that was twice in one day. Maybe I’d acquired a new superpower. Too bad it wasn’t teleportation – I could zap myself out of there.
‘Hi, Claude,’ I said, making my way back to the sofa.
‘Hi. Bad time?’
‘Why do you ask?’
‘I don’t know. You sound… odd.’
‘Just been a long day,’ I replied. ‘What’s up?’
‘Umm… look, it’s probably nothing and you’re going to think I’m mad but…’
‘Claude,’ I groaned. ‘Just out with it, please.’
‘All right,’ she said, clearly stung.
I was being a right shit, and it wasn’t Claude’s fault I’d painted myself into a romantic corner. ‘Sorry.’
‘That’s okay. I just wondered if you’ve seen the photographs Niki’s uploaded to the shared drive?’
‘Er, no… Why?’ I asked, fumbling for my laptop. As I logged on, an uneasy feeling washed over me.
Claude laughed a false, shrill laugh that sharpened my apprehension. ‘Like I said, it’s probably nothing, but there’s a bloke in some of the photos… He’s never in focus but… well, he sort of reminds me ofTommy.’
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
‘Um, can you hold on a sec?’
I set down the phone and navigated to the folder we’d shared with Niki. I quickly scrolled through dozens of photos and stopped when I got to one of me and Tommy on the boat. He wasn’t in focus, like Claude had said, but if you knew Tommy – and she did – it was clearly him.
The photos from Naxos hadn’t been uploaded yet – we’d only been back an hour – but even if Minh stayed true to his word, doing his best to disguise Tommy’s identity, Claude would figure it out soon enough. I was a fool to think I could hide something this momentous from her.
I needed to tell her the truth. Only… I wasn’t ready – too many unknowns, my emotions all over the place… And without question, Claude would tell me to come home. I couldn’t chance it. Not yet.
‘Al? You there?’ Claude’s disembodied voice shouted from my phone. I picked it up.
‘Sorry. I’m guessing you mean the bloke on the boat?’ I asked, playing dumb.
‘Well, obvs,’ she said with a laugh. ‘But don’t you think he’s a dead ringer for Tommy?’
‘I suppose a little – if you squint. But he doesn’t in real life – same hair colour but that’s about it.’ It was my first baldfaced lie.
Well, not my first lieever. Not even my first lie to Claude, but really, you can’t blame me for telling her that the pixie cut she got after her divorce suited her. It would have been cruel to kick her when she was down. Besides, hair eventually grows back. Self-esteem has to be painstakingly rebuilt over time, so it was a kindly lie.
