But what exactly was he apologising for? Dredging up one of the happiest memories of my life?
‘Oia,’ I replied – the name of the town on the tip of Santorini’s caldera where we and hundreds of others had watched, awestruck, as the sun sank into the Aegean, drenching us all in golden light.
I’d sat on a step right in front of Tommy, ensconced between his strong thighs, my hands resting on his knees and his chin on my head. I’d felt safe and madly in love. Perhaps the happiest I’d ever been in my entire life. The chatter of a dozen languages buzzed about us excitedly. ‘Aria on Air’ played on a portable speaker and someone was strumming a guitar. At one point, the guitarist caught on and played along to the music.
‘I love you, Ally.’ Tommy’s deep, resonant voice in my ear had given me chills and I’d spun around and looked up at him.
He wasbathedin pinkish, golden light – as if it was emanating from within – and my breath had caught in my throat, tears prickling my eyes. In that moment, he was the most beautiful being I’d ever encountered and my love for him threatened to spill out of me, cascade down the steep incline, and wash away everyone between me and the sea.
I cleared my throat and took another sip of my cocktail. Tears threatened – that’s how intense the memory was – and I blinked them away.
‘It’s a beautiful island, Santorini,’ I said, finding my voice.
‘Yes.’
We were quiet for some time and I wondered if, like me, Tommy was torturing himself with the bittersweet memories of happier times.
‘So,’ I said when I regained my composure. ‘You had something important to tell me.’
He cleared his throat, as though he wasn’t sure where to start. ‘I do,’ he said finally. ‘And it’s not…easy.’
I swallowed hard, my eyes locked on his as he wrestled with his thoughts.
This is it.The moment Tommy confessed he’d missed me all these years, that letting me go was the biggest mistake of his life.
‘It’s about Aeth?—’
‘Good evening, beautiful,’ said Julian, appearing out of nowhere. He came in for a cheek kiss and Tommy bristled.
Jealousy? Hah – doubtful!He wasn’t baring his soul – this was about the island.
‘Hello, Tom.’ Julian reached out and they shook hands, Tommy returning Julian’s warm smile with a terse facsimile.
I looked between them, a niggling thought twisting in my gut. Had Tommy known that Julian was my ex-husbandbeforeJulian introduced us?
I hadn’t hidden my marriage to Julian from Tommy (of course not), but he and I weren’t in contact much during that time and when we were, we didn’t discuss Julian.
No, I concluded. Being stuck between a rock and a hard place – or a rocky marriage and a hard one – was pure coincidence. A nightmare that only bad luck could have conjured.
Both watched me expectantly and, for a moment, I was torn. Stay with hubby number one to find out what was behind the Secret Squirrel stuff or off to dinner with number three to return a £1000 bangle?
That long soak in a hot bath was looking better and better.
Excuse me, husbands, but I have a prior engagement with some bath salts and a fabulous little sex toy called the Oblisserator.
‘Jules, I’m just about finished,’ I said instead, holding up my nearly drunk cocktail. ‘Shall I meet you at the restaurant in a few minutes?’
I could tell Julian knew he was being dismissed, which he would hate, but after a brief narrow-eyed stare, he broke into a magnanimous smile.
‘Oh course, darling. And I hope you’re hungry. Dimitra’s planned a wonderful chef’s dinner for the two of us.’
That part was obviously for Tommy’s benefit. He might as well have screamed,You’re not invited, Tom!And last night, he’d called Tommy atop bloke.
What the fuck is going on with these two?
With a curt nod at Tommy, Julian left, and I watched as he greeted a couple who were sipping drinks and enjoying the sunset. No doubt‘friends’ of his who’d happily accepted a free holiday in exchange for some promo shots.
‘Do you think he knows?’ Tommy asked, his voice low.
