I can barely believe what I’m about to do, the taste of freedom is just one step away from this prison I’ve put myself in. There are two paths in front of me: one takes me away from the unnecessary pressure and stress of staying with my father, but I lose him completely, the other allows me to keep my father but I spend the rest of my life trying to achieve the unachievable.
Deciding to jump right in before I lose my nerve, I clear my throat. “I want to tell you this personally instead of letting you find out through emails with HR. I’m leaving the company. I’ve given my thirty days, but I have some personal time logged, so my office will be cleared out be the end of the week.”
The only indication he heard me is the muscle tick next to his eye, his gaze is boring into me. For the untrained eye, no one else would know he is about to flip his lid, but I see it.
He studies me for a full minute, our eyes locked in a battle of wills. I won’t back down this time. Harris went too far and I won’t be a part of this. I hold his stare to let him know I’m serious.
“If you leave, you’re cut off, and don’t expect to find another job in this city.” His face is indifferent aside from the red flush in his cheeks.
The threat hurts, especially coming from the man that’s supposed to love me unconditionally. But I swallow the ache that’s bubbling up from my chest and try to keep my composure.
I smile at him. “You don’t have to worry about me, dad. I won’t tell anyone you encouraged an employee to burn down someone’s barn with the horses in it attempting to scare them into selling their land to you.”
His eyes narrow ever so slightly, clearly not expecting to hear me stand up for myself. If I learned anything from him, it’s how to be shrewd and uncaring. To use a term I heard from Hallie, ‘what’s good for the goose is good for the gander’.
“Don’t start something you can’t finish, Elly.” His normally smooth voice has an edge. “If you choose this road, you’re on your own. When things implode on you, and they will, Elly.” He huffs out a breath. “You’ll get nothing from me.”
The little girl in me wants to retreat, abort, go to a safe place where she can pretend it doesn’t hurt. A real father, a good father, would tell me I always know where to find him if I need him.
I remind myself I don’t need him. A deep breath helps me straighten my spine and square my shoulders, even though I can hear my heartbeat and rushing blood behind my eardrums. “I am finishing it, dad. I don’t like what you do, so I’m throwing in the towel. We can end this peacefully, or I can remind you I’ve had my fingers on the pulse of this company for years.”
His glare is his only response.
“I know things, dad. Things I know many people won’t agree with. It’s up to you.” Even with my hands in my pockets, my fingers are trembling, and I take another deepbreath to steady my voice.
“If you walk out of here, don’t ever come back.” The disdain in his voice is breaking my heart and tears sting the backs of my eyes.
I make a last-minute decision to get some stuff off my chest before I walk out of here for the last time. “The only thing I ever wanted from you was a kind word. Approval. Recognition.”
He jerks his head back like a jolt of lightning just hit him, a look of irritation mixed with disgust on his face. “What does that have to do with business? You get all of those things by being employed by me.”
“No Dad, those things should have been offered by a father to a daughter, and I should have fought harder for that when I was young, but I didn’t. I settled for any crumbs you would give me. Unfortunately, the only way to get anything from you is by working with you.”
He only turns his head and looks out the window. “This is what happens when women get involved in business, they try to devalue everything with feelings.” His usual jab at my lack of a penis equating to lack of sense.
Realizing it doesn’t matter what I say, I will always be less in his eyes, I take a deep breath. “Yes, well, me and my feelings will be out of your hair in a few days.” I take my hands out of my pockets and let them hang at my sides. “I love you, dad.”
He doesn’t say a word as I turn and walk out of his office for the last time.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
GRAY
THE WRENCHslips off the bolt of the garbage disposal, sending my knuckles across the hard plastic housing.Fuck!Ignoring the blood on the backs of my fingers, I re-seat the wrench and start pushing the locked-up bolt again, regardless of the water that keeps dripping on my hand to make a good grip impossible.
When my knuckles fly across the plastic edge again, I throw the wrench against the back wall under the sink and pull my hand away. I knew I should have brought my fucking gloves, but I forgot to grab them after I fed the horses.
My head has been so fucked up lately that even the simplest or redundant of chores is littered with mistakes. I can’t even get a bolt off a god-damned garbage disposal. I pull my body out of the cabinet under the sink and sit on the floor to see how much skin I’ve taken off my knuckles.
“Come here.” Marley’s soft voice surprises me and I look up to see her setting the first aid kit and my gloves on the counter.
“I’m fine.” I growl and let my hand fall to my lap, ignoring the stinging pain that’s radiating over my hand.
Her blue eyes slide in my direction, and she lifts a brow. “Come. Here.”
Marley may be passive and sweet, but she is just as stubborn as Kinley. She told me once that having overbearing, stubborn brothers trained her well. Knowing she’s not going to let it go, I stand next to the counter and hold my hand out.
“What are you doing in here?” I ask, the gruff of my voice rivals my dad.
