“We don’t have phones to tell time,” Brandon said.
“We guess. Never split up from your partner,” Caspian continued. “No more climbing. If there’s a slope or wall, come back. If someone gets hurt, come back. That includes Ava’s condition. If she gets worse at all I’m turning us around and yelling for you both.”
The last statement made everyone tense. He’d just made clear Brandon and Mothman were in one group, me and him in the other. Brandon’s eyes flashed to Mothman. Mothman’s wings started to come out, peeking from the open strips of his jacket before jerking back inside. He shook his head and thrust his hand in his jacket, pulling out his journal.
Mothman’s head jerked like he saw something behind us and goosebumps popped on my arms. But then he shook his head and wrote in his journal.
“I’m the fastest and I can fly. I should go with Ava,”was written in his journal. Caspian’s lips peeled back from his teeth and a strange, animalistic sound rumbled in his chest.
Mothman slid closer, tentatively reaching out towards my arm. Caspian held me tighter, crushing me to him, the trilling deep rumble purring up from his gut and making his chest vibrate.
“Don't fight!” I said quickly.
“Give me a minute,” Caspian snapped out, dragging me down one of the tunnels until we had a small amount of privacy. He gripped my face in my hands.
“Are you upset with me?” I asked. “About Mothman?” He looked alarmed by my question.
“I could never be upset with you,” he said, his face pinched in confusion by the concept.
“But the cabin and then I keep clinging to him. He feels safe and with everything that’s happened...” Caspian looked at me intently, listening to every word. When he said nothing I sagged.
“I’m sorry. I’ll stop.”
“No, Ava, don’t be sorry,” his lips found mine, gentle and soft—sweet, tender kisses peppering me as he talked. “I want you to feel safe. I want you tobesafe and I trust him to keep you safe,” he admitted.
“Still… I’m your mate?” I asked tentatively, recalling the words he’d said at the river.
“Yes,” he said with a smile, his fingers brushing over the bite mark on my neck tenderly. It made me squirm a little when he did, feeling a quiet demand grown in my center.
“That means something big, doesn’t it? I’ll stop clinging to him,” I said and Caspian frowned, and looked away. Okay, not quite the reaction I understood.
“I would never take away your autonomy,” he said slowly. His eyes settled heavily on me and his thumb brushed my bottom lip. He was trying to tell me something but he wasn’t being clear.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re mine, Ava. My mate and that’s never changing.”
“And I love you,” I said and he gave me dreamy eyes, smiling warmly.
“Yes. I love you and you love me,” he agreed languidly, kissing near my hairline, brushing a few strands of my hair back.
“So…” I said. He sighed. It seemed like he was struggling to say what he wanted to.
“I can’t control howmuchI need you,” he loomed over me. His hands shot out to box me against the cave wall. I heard his talons scratching at the wall ever so slightly. My eyes widened as a fervent expression flashed wildly on his face.
“You’re my everything, Ava, but I don’t want to own you. I don’t want to...” he looked panicked for a moment, his eyes flashing with fear.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. He bent down, dropping his head on my shoulder while sighing.
“I’m scared sometimes,” he said. His lips pressed against my ear like he was telling me a secret. His hands came off the wall and wrapped around me, pressing me hard against him.
“Of what?” I asked quietly. He was acting strange and it was making me worried about what he had to say. “I’m sorry you felt you had to hide things from me. I don’t want that anymore. I’m not going to keep pretending ghosts aren’t real or that you’re human.” He took a deep breath.
“I’m afraid of myself, Ava. I’m so fucking terrified of what I might do to you,” he bit out, his grip on me almost crushing. My face pressed tightly against his body and his temperature grew hotter.
“You’re afraid of hurting me?” I asked. I think I knew what this was about. “What you did, you had to do. Killing those men doesn’t make you a mon—...” I almost said monster. Caspian pulled back and looked down at me. His eyes remained flat as he smiled. It was chilling, especially with all those many teeth. He leaned forward, pressing his mouth to the shell of my ear again. I could feel his teeth against me.
“Ava, you know Caspian the man but I’m no man. I’m a nokken and our stories aren’t romances, they’re tragedies. But maybe we have a fucking chance if you keep clinging to safety.”
