Love me, I insisted in my head.
“I’m the lucky one,” I countered. She raised a questioning eyebrow and I swallowed down all the words I could give her. How perfect she was, how beautiful, how kind, how gentle. How she was my everything. How I’d never leave her and wouldneverlet her go.
How I wanted to climb through this window and show her how much I loved her by how hard I thrust into her body for hours on end. My perfect Ava. Even her flaws were loveable if not frustrating considering the very things she feared were the very things I were.
I leaned on the car, pushing my head through the window so that I was smiling just a few inches from her face. Her eyes widened and I saw her gaze dart to my lips.Mmm, I liked that.
She didn’t know how much I loved her little reactions. She didn't know a lot.
Love me, Ava.
“It’s true. Who else would have invited me on a cross-country camping trip?” I asked, being flippant. She rolled her eyes and gave a small huffed laugh. It made my smile grow wider, watching her reaction up close, memorizing it.
“Doesn’t sound like a fair trade. You’re perfect and I’m a mess.”
“A beautiful mess,” I said, gazing up at her. She choked on the water she was sipping and I smirked. “Now sleep,” I insisted, pushing away from the car. She nodded, her eyes watering as she coughed.
Our five year break had been the right choice, however difficult it had been. I could see her interest now. She looked at me like a man—not a brother, not a friend. When I flirted she reacted perfectly and I noticed it all—the hardened peaks of her breasts, her dilating eyes, her parting lips, the way her thighs rubbed together in invitation forme.
Her body craved mine and she was fully aware of it.Thiswas the way my mate was supposed to act. It was a relief after all those years she'd considered me a platonic void of brotherly friendship.
5
9 years ago
My dad was getting marriedagain.
I leapt, diving into the river smoothly. A sigh of relief expelled from me as I closed my eyes and glided. This would be the last time in these waters. Tomorrow we left. Away from Spain, away from Europe, away from the waters I’d swam my entire life to end up surrounded by saltwater and strangers.
For hours I stayed underwater, never once needing air.
After I pulled myself out, I looked at the surface of the river. My hand rubbed at my chest, just above my heart. Last year it had begun to ache. The sensation made me cranky and mean.
It was also the reason why I hadn’t complained when my dad said he was getting married again. That we were moving nearly fourthousandmiles to someplace called Norfolk, Virginia.
We were creatures with flaws—always driven towards a connection, so much so that it ached.
Dad had already had a mate, my mom. She was gone now and there was no such thing as a new one. You only imprinted once. That didn’t stop his craving for connection. He had to live with the constant disturbance in his chest.
I felt bad for him. I felt bad for the women he married too since it was a doomed relationship from the start.
It was all shit. I’d rather live my life with the stupid ache in my chest than the cleaving pain of losing something so great. Of losing the one thing that could bring a nokken peace.
I walked home barefoot and naked, leaving a river dyed red in blood behind me. The mutilated shreds of every fish I could find, bobbing lifelessly on the surface, my teeth and claw marks indented into every one. I'd desecrated my beloved river.
I didn’t plan to know what peace tasted like.
* * *
“We’re here,”my dad said, the edge of excitement simmering under his smooth voice. My eyes slowly cracked open. It felt like it should be night but the sun was blaring down brutally. I stretched in the rental car’s seat. My dad’s new fiance had a last-minute emergency. Apparently, the FBI occasionally called her in, desperate enough to use a ghost medium for any help they could get. Which left us grabbing a rental instead of having her pick us up.
I blinked at the house in front of me in confusion.
“This isn’t a hotel,” I said, looking at the ivy-covered stone mansion sprawling in front of me. We were parked on a cobblestone driveway that looked more like a courtyard. My eyes slid to the perfectly manicured gardens and the stone fountains gushing water.
“Didn’t I tell you?” My dad asked, looking at me in confusion. “We’re moving in right away.” He stepped out of the car.
“Fuck me,” I grumbled before stepping out too. Guess a moment to readjust to the states before being jammed into a new family was too much to ask. The house had sharp roofs and multiple chimneys. It looked old and gothic. It fit with my new step mom’s thing, I supposed.
