“Premarital sex isn’t approved of in theAnglican church either, you know.”
“And you have the nerve to call yourself arighteous man?”
“Shut up.I’ll see you in fifteen.”
Mark ended the call and frowned at his phone.Will was just kidding, and it wasn’t like Mark actually thought ofhimself as being without sin.But he shouldn’t joke about hisweaknesses, shouldn’t allow himself to think of them as anythingother than transgressions not only against God, but also againstthe congregation he served.He was a sinner, encouraging others toavoid sin.
He thought of what he’d told the boy: Godsees everything, and He is understanding and forgiving.It was acomforting thing to tell a kid trying to navigate the tricky worldof family, friends, and uncooperative urges.But was it somethingMark should be counting on in his own life?
“I need a drink,” he said out loud, andheaded out the door.
“She wants another kid.”Will groaned afterthe punch line to his long tale of domestic discord.He waved asauce-covered chicken wing in the air.“Like that’s what we need!Another mouth to feed.More daycare bills!”He took a bite and gaveit only the most cursory of chews before swallowing.“We have aboy.We have a girl.One of each means we’re done.Everything is inbalance right now.Everything but the damn check book.”
Mark had lost some of his friends when hecame out, and faded away from most of the rest when he declared hisintention to become a priest.Will was about the only one who’dstuck around, and now Mark had to remember to treat him like afriend, not a member of his congregation.No sermons here.He hadadvice involving prayer, conversation and counseling, but hecrammed some fries into his mouth instead.He’d taken his collaroff literally and figuratively.
“How’re your parents doing?”Will asked, andhis voice was quieter with the changed subject.“Your dad soundedokay on the phone, but I saw them on the news last night.Your momlooked…”
“Yeah.I know.”Mark could still see hershattered expression.She was almost as upset now as she’d beenthree years earlier.“It’s hard.I don’t know if it would have beenthat much easier if he’d served the full sentence, but this?”Heshrugged and tried to look at it philosophically.“In a way, maybethe anger is good.Before, she was just numb and helpless.She’dlost her baby and there was nothing she could do about that.Butnow she’s talking about writing petitions and getting laws changedand all kinds of nonsense that’s never going to happen and wouldn’tdo any good if it did, but at least she’s active, you know?”
“And you?How are you doing with it?”
How was he doing?He shook his head andraised his beer glass, eyeing the amber contents appreciativelybefore downing the few inches that remained.Will nodded like he’dheard and understood the answer, and he raised his hand to call thewaitress over for another round.
“I shouldn’t,” Mark said.“I need todrive.”
“You live five blocks from here.”
“I have to stop in and check on myparents.”
“They live three blocks from here.It’s asmall town, man, and your family likes central living.Takeadvantage of the fact.”
“What’s it going to look like if people seemy car left overnight in a bar parking lot?”
“It’s going to look like the parish priesthas the sense to be careful about drinking and driving.Or, giventhe piece of crap you’re still pretending is a functioning vehicle,it might look like the parish priest is hoping someone will takemercy on him and steal his car so he can cash in the insurance andget a new one.”
So they had another beer, and then another,and Mark wasn’t drunk but he was pleasantly lubricated when hefinally decided he’d put off his parental visit long enough.He waswalking behind his friend, heading for the front door, when Willstopped so suddenly that Mark ran right into his broadshoulders.
Will turned to face him.“Let’s go out theback,” he said.
“What?Why?”Mark peered over his friend’sshoulder, searching for an explanation.His whole body froze whenhe saw it.“Son of a bitch.”
Will shook his head.“Yeah.I know.Let’sjust get out of here.”
“They’re having a party,” Mark said.Heshifted to the side, staring at the scene in front of him.Three orfour long tables had been shoved together like the bar did whensports teams came in after their games, but on this night, no onewas celebrating a great pitch or brutal body check.This night, theguest of honor was a blond kid with cold green eyes, sitting at thehead of the table with his hand wrapped around a mug of beer.Hewas smiling at the woman next to him as if she were the mostbeautiful and charming thing he’d ever seen.The rest of theextended table was lined with laughing, celebrating drinkerswelcoming home their prodigal son.The man who had killed Mark’sbaby brother was being treated like a hero.
“Let’s get out of here,” Will repeated, andthis time, Mark let himself be led away.
He made it out into the parking lot andbriefly wondered whether the beer and burger he’d just eaten weregoing to reappear, but he managed to hold himself together.“Aparty,” he said softly.
“It’s bullshit,” Will said.“The son of abitch should still be in jail.He should be rotting in there.”
Mark had worked in prisons, and he stillspent a lot of time at the Anglican-sponsored halfway house intown.He believed in rehabilitation, and he absolutely believed inforgiveness.But when he thought of those green eyes, the waythey’d stared out from the prisoner’s dock in the courtroom, coldand emotionless, showing no remorse, no regret for having taken ahuman life?“Yeah.He should be rotting in there.”But he wasn’t.He was here, back in town.And the town just wasn’t that big.“Ineed to get over to my parents’ place,” he said.He couldn’t do athing about the killer and his party, but at least he could be withhis family.
He stopped suddenly and fumbled for hisphone.He was giving up too easily, thinking of himself aspowerless.Lucas Cain was a menace.Three years ago, he’d killedJimmy, and now, on his first night out after serving his laughablyshort sentence, he was back in a bar, drinking and carousing justas he’d been before.He’d learned nothing, and that meant he wasstill dangerous.Mark needed to do what he could to lower the risk.And if Cain ended up back in prison where he belonged, that wouldcertainly make things a lot easier for Mark and the people heloved.
“Just a second,” he said to Will.“I need todo my civic duty.”
ChapterThree
