Come. Don’t be a coward,she urged herself, and gingerly lifted her leg in the way he said. Before she could move further, however, Callum seized her around the waist and lifted her easily up out of the saddle and down onto solid ground. She staggered a little, horrified at the sharp burst of soreness through her hips and lower back.
“Ouch,” she managed.
Callum smiled at that. “Aye, ridin’ is a painful business, especially if ye are nae used to it. Come, look at the pool. There are silver fish in it, and we can eat the blackberries that grow just over by the trees. Are ye hungry?”
“Not yet,” she admitted. “Callum, look at me.”
He paused, already halfway across the clearing. He glanced back at her, lifting his eyebrows.
“Why did you bring me here? Why did you give me Faun?”
The words seemed to echo between them. It struck her, quite suddenly, that the clearing was very quiet. She forced herself to stay quiet, however, staring at him and waiting patiently for a response.
At last, he sighed, shaking his head.
“I suppose it’s an apology. And if ye can face yer fears and ride a horse, I ought to face mine, too.”
“Fears? What fears?”
He shifted, chewing his lower lip. “For the past few years, I have felt… I feel unsettled whenever I am outside the keep walls. It didnae start suddenly. I hardly noticed it at first, but…I didnae feel like going out after…everything that happened. I only wanted to be in me tower. I ken that it’s safe there, and when I am out in the open, with all that sky above me, I cannae help but worry. I feel as though an attack could come from any direction. All this open space is… it’s oppressive, somehow. I ken that for some folks open space means freedom and possibility, but I feel the opposite. There,” he added heavily. “Embarrassin’, eh?”
“Embarrassing? Not in the slightest,” she exclaimed. “I… I am glad you told me. And clearly, your fear does not control you, because you came out to the festival to save me that night. You arehere.”
“True,” he acknowledged, dropping down into a crouch beside the water. He eyed the rippling pool with a soft expression and reached out to touch the surface.
There was a low, flattish stone nearby, and Melody perched on that. She sensed that Callum had not finished speaking, and wanted to be ready to hear what he had to say. She watched him reach out and pluck a few long strands of grass. Absently, he began to braid them together.
This is progress, she thought, her heart tightening.He trusts me. Or he is beginning to do so.
“I ought to warn ye,” he said abruptly. “The councilors want ye to join a council meetin’ soon. Tonight, in fact. They wish to discuss the weddin’ plans, and I imagine they want to get an idea of yer political acumen.”
Melody hadn’t quite been expecting this. She flinched, swallowing hard.
“Oh. I… well, of course I’ll join, if you wish it.”
He nodded. “That is good of ye. I should tell her that Thomas Johnson will be there. He’s a councilor, too, although he has not been very active on the council since the loss of his daughter. Nobody has the heart to remove him.”
“What? Your father-in-law?”
“Aye, that’s him. I daenae ken what sort of behavior to expect from him. I ken that he does nae approve of the marriage, although I daenae claim that it’s ye specifically that he disapproves of. He’d be angry to see me marry anybody again. He has nae left off grievin’ his daughter, and thinks that I should be the same.”
Melody paused to consider what to say next.
“It must be difficult for you,” she ventured at last. “You lost your wife, who I imagine was the love of your life. Even if ye say ye werenae in love, I’m sure ye just didnae want to hurt me feelings, and she was the love of yer life?—”
“She was nae.”
Well. Melody certainly had not expected him to insist. She glanced at him, struggling to find the words to respond. Callum glanced up from where he was concentrating on braiding the grass.
“Elsie and I had always friends,” he continued, suddenly, not meeting her eye. “She was much like Kat, in fact. Clever, outspoken, determined. I admired her a good deal. When I became Laird and realized I had to marry, marryin’ her seemed a fine choice. Her father was wealthy, owned a good deal of land. He was well-respected among the other clans, and Elsie herself was a talented healer, loved throughout the clan. She was popular. We werenae in love with each other, but we certainly did love each other, if ye understand what I mean. Everything went well. Until…” He swallowed hard, eyes fluttering shut. “Until it all crumbled. Elsie lost her light. Ye would never have believed that a woman like her could give in to melancholy, but she did. She rotted from the inside out, and I did nae notice until it was too late. She took her own life, and I could nae save her.” ElsieElsieElsie
“It isn’t your fault, Callum.”
“Then whose fault should it be? I was her husband, and I could nae save her. I ken that Thomas blames me. I daresay he is right.”
Melody bit her lip, glancing away. “I have a feeling that you won’t answer me, but… but can I ask you what happened to make Elsie lose her light?”
He rose stiffly to his feet.
