"Yeah," I admitted. "I didn't wanna spend all day worryin' none, and she woke up before I got the chance to ask. So this is me askin', babe. The last thing I want is for my belligerence to crush you out of this thing we're doing."
"J.D., I'm fine," he promised. "I also know Jake's scared of you, but he's scared of me in a whole different way." Then he made a noise and rocked his head from side to side, admitting it wasn't that simple. "And yeah, I have some insecurity issues, ok?"
"But you're good?" I asked.
"Look, I don't give a shit about her fucking him. My fear is that she'll like him more. And Jake? He's more like me than Ty was."
"Might just mean she has a type," I pointed out.
"Might," he agreed. "Shit, I wouldn't mind at all if that was true. I just..." He paused, turning to rest his forearms on the bedrail of my truck. "Fuck."
"What?" I asked, a little fear slamming right into my gut and making my dick forget all about the hotness a second ago.
"I don't know what she sees in me," he finally said. "That's the truth of it, J.D. I mean, with you, it makes more sense. I can tell myself you don't really have many options for men in the PBR. And Iknowthat's not why you're with me, but that one little thing makes me feel a bit more secure."
"Yeah, I can see that," I assured him.
"But Cody?" he went on. "She could have any guy here. Hell, half of them would drop and beg for a second of her attention."
"She ain't realized that yet," I pointed out.
"Maybe not," Tanner agreed, "but it's still true. And yet, she picked me. It started because she thought I was gay, which doesn't help much."
"And now she's in love with you, babe."
He nodded. "And that's the part that makes me anxious, you know? Not like nervous, just..." He grunted, proving those weren't the words he wanted. "Insecure? I fucking hate acting like that's some crutch, but it's the truth. She could do better-"
"Nope," I said. "First off, ain't no other man gonna be cool with a threesome the same way you are." And I winked. "There's your stupid shallow reason to hold onto. But second, there ain't no other man in the whole PBR who's pretty like you, crazy like you, and so fucking sweet like you. And somehow you make all those come together to be real nice, Tanner."
"Yeah?" he asked, looking over.
"Mhm," I agreed, shifting around so I was a bit closer. "And you are hot as hell. Fuck, you're as built as Jake. Different type, but just as nice. And you got a real good dick." I ran my eyes over him and caught his hip. "You also treat her with the kind of respect she sure as shit ain't used to. The kind that doesn't have strings and doesn't judge her based on your wants or likes." As I kept talking, he turned, putting his back against my truck so we were face to face.
So I leaned in. "So don't be jealous of Jake, ok?"
"Working on it," he said, hooking a finger in the front pocket of my jeans to tug me closer. "I'm not upset about him, though. I just wanted to make sure his head is in the right place. Even when I am jealous, I'm still ok with her getting this chance, because the woman we have now is a lot more proud and self-assured than the one back in St. Louis. I like knowing we gaveher room to find herself, and I really do believe you're right. Letting her choose means she will always choose us."
"Yeah," I breathed, moving in a little.
I was gonna kiss him. Hell, I was thinkin' real hard about grinding on him a bit before we went in. This whole talking it out thing was definitely working for me, but just as Tanner lifted his face, making it clear he wouldn't tell me no, someone laughed behind us - and the cruel type.
"Aww, the faggots gonna give us a show."
That was Austin's voice. I spun. Tanner braced up, shifting to my side. Together, we watched as Austin and Derek sauntered closer, but there was one big fucking problem: the tire iron Austin was casually slapping against his palm.
"I don't like that word none," I told him. "It's the kinda thing dumb-ass rednecks say because they can't come up with anything better. Maybe try fudge packer? Dick sucker? C'mon, put a little effort in, you piece of shit."
"Don't wanna think about the sick shit you do withhim," Derek shot back.
Austin simply slapped the tire iron against his palm again. "Didn't figure you for a queer, J.D. But since you are? Well, I'll tell you the same thing I told Cody. Go home. The PBR is for real men, and real men only. And if you won't go, I'll make sure you hurt enough you can't rideeveragain."
I shifted, moving in front of Tanner slightly. "Yeah?" I asked, letting my voice turn cold. "Funny how Cody's still here, innit? Seems to me like your threats are bullshit, Austin."
"We'll see if you think that after I hit you where it hurts most." Then he and Derek surged in.
I simply got the fuck out of Tanner's way. I hadn't moved before him because I needed to protect him. Nah, I was giving my man a reason to worry. I was letting him think I was gonnado something real fuckin' dumb, because I knew that'd wind his ass up.
And now I was turning him loose - and hoping my broken fucking body could keep up.
