I was disappointedwhen Grace declined my invitation to come back to the house with us. “You guys need to be with family tonight,” she said.
But you’re part of that,I wanted to argue. To tell her that she belonged with me. That I was more than ready to tell the entire world—especially my daughter—how I felt about her.
Grace, apparently, was not on the same page. And I was starting to wonder if she ever would be.
I got permission to skip practice the next day and kept Josie home from school. I figured we more than deserved it. We spent the day just the two of us, huddled up on the couch with snacks and movies.
It was hard to drop her off at school the following morning. I ended up walking her all the way to her class. Josie rolled her eyes at me, but she didn’t complain.
“Josie,” Grace said as soon as she saw us. She put an arm around my daughter’s shoulder, giving her a quick squeeze. “I’m so glad to see you,” she murmured softly, just for her.
“Me too,” Josie whispered back, casting a sheepish smile to the floor.
“I need your help this morning,” Gracie said. “Gerald hasn’t been fed yet.”
Josie’s face lit up. “Okay!” She started to run to the back of the classroom before catching herself. She turned back to me, curled her arms around my middle in a quick hug, then ran off again with a “bye, Dad!” over her shoulder.
“Gerald?” I asked.
“The class turtle,” she explained, watching Josie pulling a step stool up to a glass tank behind the desks. “She seems to be back to herself.” I could hear the relief in her voice.
“Yeah. I think things are going to be a little easier for her.” I rubbed my hand over the back of my neck. “Remember when you said the school could recommend a therapist?”
Grace finally turned to face me and my stomach tightened when our eyes met. She looked a little more pale than usual, purplish shadows visible under her eyes, like maybe she hadn’t been sleeping much either.
And she was still the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
“Of course,” she said softly, eyes scanning my face.
“I think we’re ready for that,” I said. I still wasn’t entirely comfortable with the idea of trusting her emotional health to a stranger, but my daughter needed more help than I knew how to give. A familiar pang of guilt radiated in my chest. I probably should have set her up with someone weeks ago.
“I’ll get you the numbers by this afternoon,” Grace said. Then she squeezed my arm in an encouraging sort of way. I stilled, the feeling of her hand on my bare skin both comforting and painful at the same time. Painful, because I wanted more. I was always going to want more from her.
But Grace’s eyes filled with regret, and my stomach dropped right down to my knees. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
I watched her face, wondering if she was going to bring up our fight in her kitchen. “For what?” I finally urged.
Her voice shook when she answered. “I should have been here that day.”
Wait…what? She was sorry for taking a personal day? “Grace, that wasn’t your fault.”
She shook her head, curls bouncing on her shoulders. “It was. If I had been here?—”
“You’re allow to take a day off, Gracie. Hell, Josie and I took one yesterday. It’s not your fault something happened when you weren’t even here.”
She didn’t look at all appeased. “I feel awful about it,” she went on. “Josie was having such a hard time that she ran away. And I was sitting in a restaurant drinking with my girlfriends and bitching about my love li—” She caught herself before finishing, pressing her lips into a tight line, but I was pretty sure I knew what she’d been about to say.
She went out with her girlfriends to bitch about her love life. Meaning me. And the argument we’d had a few days ago.
There was so much I wanted to say to her. I wanted to apologize for being distracted when Chloe was here. I wanted to tell her that I was done pretending we weren’t real—that I should have insisted on being open about our relationship from the very beginning. And after my conversation with Andrew, more than anything, I wanted to ask her about what had happened all those years ago.
“Have dinner with me Friday night,” I said suddenly. “I think we have a lot to talk about.”
She bit her lip and I struggled to keep my gaze on her eyes. Staring at her lips would just make me want to kiss them, and even I knew that wasn’t a good idea in the middle of her classroom while parents and aides darted in and out with their kids.
“I can’t.” She looked genuinely regretful. “I agreed to go to some charity thing with Andy.” She raised hopeful eyes to my face. “Tomorrow?”
I bit back a curse. “I have a game tomorrow.”
