prologue
Rule #1 - no hooking up with anyone else.
Rule #2 - don’t get attached.
Rule #3 - no one can know about us.
Rule #4 - You will end up with me. Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow, but one day soon, you will be mine again.
-Dean
hannah
“My hat!”My high pitched shriek echoes around the cab of my parents’ F-350. My dad stands outside, dodging every item I can grab that’s laying on the backseat and floor throwing it out the back door as I search between the seats for my lucky hat. “Fuck! Where is it?”
“Hannah!” my mom scolds from the front, the turquoise rings on her fingers clicking against the console where her hand is currently wedged. “Language.”
“It’s my lucky hat, Mama!” Tears start to spill down my cheeks and I sit back against the soft leather, letting them fall. “It may seem stupid to you, but things like that matter on nights like this!” I throw my hand out towards the rodeo arena across the parking lot. The bleachers are filling up with families holding popcorn and plates of food. More trucks and trailers pull into the contestant lot, carrying some of the best riders from across the country—I’ve worked my ass off to even be considered among them. My parents have driven me around the country for the past few years as I slowly made a name for myself in the barrel racing community.
A large hand lands on my knee, squeezing gently. I look over at my dad, his soft, blue eyes staring kindly back at me. “Hannah, it’s not stupid. If it matters to you, then it matters to us.” He gives me a smile then claps his hands together. “We’ve got time. Your mom and I will run back to the hotel and look while you get Queen warmed up.” Relief washes over me and I swing my head back and forth between the two of them.
“Really?”
“Absolutely, honey,” my mom says, coming to stand next to my dad. He tucks her against him and kisses the top of her head. I’ve never seen a more in love couple; they give me hope that one day I’ll find myself a cowboy just like Mama did.
“Thank you.” I sigh and shuffle out of the backseat. The two of them pull me into a big hug and I rest my cheek against my dad’s shirt, breathing in the familiar comfort they both offer.
“But just so you know,” he says, leaning in close so just me and my mom hear, “at nineteen, you’re already a better barrel racer than any of these women. And a better rider than any cowboy here.” He winks, which makes me roll my eyes. My mom laughs, tugging at his arm.
“Ok cowboy, let’s go.” Pulling him away, she throws a wink over her shoulder.
“Hurry back!” I yell as I lift myself up on Queen, who has been eyeing the commotion from her spot tied to the trailer. They drive off in a cloud of dust accompanied by a chorus of “I love yous.” I watch the truck blend into traffic before turning Queen towards the indoor arena, clicking my tongue to get her walking.
An hour ticks by, and I’ve run a trail around the arena, trying to keep my mind off my quickly approaching ride.They should have been back by now.I glance at my watch—not even a minute has passed since I checked it the last time. I slide down from my saddle and walk Queen over to the side before tying herto the fence, then lay my head against her side and take deep breaths, trying to calm the anxiety racing through me.
“Riders!” A loud voice booms through the space. Everyone pauses and looks towards the man straddling the top of the peeling metal fence surrounding us. “Barrel racing is up in thirty minutes. Please stay close and listen for your name.” He nods before jumping down and disappearing down a hallway. Patting Queen, I slip under one of the railings and walk down another hall towards the restrooms, my boots landing loudly against the cement floor.
“We can’t leave yet!” a whiny voice echoes in the small bathroom. A curvy brunette is pouting at her friend, one hip leaned against the sink. Her skinny legs disappear into a pair of cheap white boots that I guarantee were bought for the summer and will be sold online come fall. “Please stay,” she practically begs, “just until we see him ride.”
“Who?” Her friend gives her a side eye that has me biting my tongue as I slip into a stall.
“Dean.” The brunette sighs and I can practically see the hearts in her eyes from behind my closed stall door.
“Oh my God, Ashley!” her friends scolds. “You don’t even know him!”
“Don’t have to know him to know how good he’d be in bed. Just watch him ride and you’ll see for yourself. I heard he likes to share.” She basically sings the last part as they leave the bathroom.
“Buckle bunnies,” I whisper to myself, shaking my head.
A few minutes later, and I’ve cleared my head as I make my way back to Queen. While I walk through the soft dirt, I peek out at the stands. I’ve never heard an outdoor arena be this loud. The crowd is on fire tonight, and every howl and whistle adds to the adrenaline that has replaced my earlier anxiety.
My phone buzzes with a text from my mom:
Package secured, headed back to the arena now. Remember to breathe, baby. You got this!
The picture attached shows my mom and dad holding my hat between them, grinning big at the camera. They couldn’t have any more kids after they had me, so it’s always been the three of us. Growing up in Oakley, Utah, riding is what we did on a daily basis. My earliest memories are on the back of some horse, riding between my parents. Tucking my phone in my back pocket, I rub Queen’s neck and look around at the other riders beginning to slow their horses and get in place.
Grabbing the saddle I swing a leg over Queens back, her bright white mane a stark contrast to her tan coat. We have been riding together for years, and we’ve just hit our stride in the rodeo circuit. Tonight is our chance to place in the top three. Only fractions of a second separates the three women in the lead, and I plan to fly by them all. Queen stomps the ground impatiently as we wait in the line up inside the practice arena. Dust floats around me and I inhale deeply, the smell of popcorn and arena food overpowered by the heavy scent of freshly raked dirt. I watch as Mallory George flies up the chute.Damn, she’s fast.Tilting my wrist, I check the time,again. They should be back by now, my turn is coming up soon. I know they would kick themselves if they missed this ride.
