Lewis shook his head. “So theatrical! You have no idea what it is like having someone who is so entirely dependent on you. I have shaped my entire life around her, and I have to manage the crushing weight of upsetting her any time I wish to deviate from our set schedule.”
Bridget inhaled sharply. Dozens of emotions flitted across her face, too quickly for Lewis to identify them.
“So you see,” Lewis continued, grabbing his jacket from the floor. “I am not a good man. I am not akindman. And if I indulge you too much, romantic girl that you are, you will become too attached to me.”And me to you.
Bridget scowled. “I can assure you that there is no danger of that happening in the foreseeable future!”
“Good.”
He did not bother to put on his jacket, instead throwing it over his arm. Lewis stormed away, refusing to look at Bridget for a moment longer. She unsettled him in a way that she had not before. Bridget spoke as if she understood him, and she could not possibly know who he really was.
“I will leave your bedroom!” Bridget said after him. “You do not have to pretend to work.”
But Lewis did not even want to spend the night in his own bed, for it would doubtlessly remind him of the union with Bridget and worse, her request.
“Idohave work,” he said.
Lewis left the bedchamber, closing the door behind him, so any servants still awake would not see his wife in such an immodest state. He trudged to his study, his chest tight and his thoughts a tempest.
Bridget’s request had been so very simple. So sweet.
And even if it was for the best that he not let her be so affectionate with him, Lewis found thatregretsettled uncomfortably in his stomach. He sat behind his desk in the dark and sighed. What was he going to do with her?
CHAPTER 34
“Isuppose I have only myself to blame,” Bridget said. “I have made it quite apparent to Lewis that I did not care to marry him. How can I expect him to believe that I have truly changed my mind?”
“So, youdowant this marriage now?” Dorothy asked.
The sisters walked alongside one another through the gardens, which were in full bloom and lovely. Gerard was with them, although he remained several feet ahead of them, speaking with the head gardener. Bridget could not hear their conversation from this distance, but occasionally, Gerard would gesture with his arms, emphasizing some point.
That was for the best. Asking her sister for advice about marriage was embarrassing enough; she hardly wanted her brother-in-law’s opinion on why Lewis had rejected her affections. The matter was…personal and impacted Bridget more than she wanted to admit.
“I would not say that Iwantthis marriage,” Bridget said. “I mean, not with absolute certainty. It is just that I care more about it than I anticipated that I would.”
“I see. Why do you think that is?”
Bridget sighed. “I suppose it is because of his grandmother. I care about her and want to see that she is happy.”
“You wanted your husband to remain in bed with you because of his grandmother,” Dorothy said. “Bridget, I do not understand your point.”
Bridget sighed. “I suppose I began to perceive Lewis differently after realizing how much he cares for his grandmother. It is harder to dislike the marriage now that I have seen he is a good man.”
Dorothy hummed. “Perhaps you ought to ask my husband for his thoughts. Having a man’s perspective might be helpful.”
Heat flooded Bridget’s face. “I am not going to discuss my—my affection for my husband with another man.”
“You do not need to share all the sordid details with him,” Dorothy said, sounding amused.
Bridget had not exactly shared all the details with her sister either.
The gardener bowed to Gerard and then walked hastily away, seemingly off to accomplish whatever task Gerard had given him. Bridget bit the inside of her cheek, as they reached Dorothy’s husband. Maybe a man’s perspectivewouldbe helpful.
“Are you enjoying your walk, my sweet?” Gerard took Dorothy’s hand in his and placed a gentle kiss on her knuckles. “Are you certain you do not need to rest?”
“Entirely certain,” she said, dropping a hand to her stomach. “You need not worry so much.”
“The baby will arrive any day,” he said, placing his hand over Dorothy’s. “Most women would already be abed.”
