“It does not matter. She needs to be?—”
“If you saytrained!” his grandmother cried. “Lewis, people cannot be forced to change. They will do so only if they want to, and I wonder if you have considered what this young lady wants.”
Lewis inwardly flinched, as if he had been struck. He had not really given much thought to what Bridget might want. Aside from pleasure, of course, but any woman would want that.
“It is just a marriage of convenience,” he said.
Like many members of thetonhad. So why did the realization that he had given so little thought to Bridget’s wants disturb him so greatly?
“She upset you,” Lewis said.
That was safer territory than wondering why he cared about what his wife of convenience wanted.
“Because I did not anticipate her,” his grandmother said. “If I knew that she was coming, I might do better.”
“You never do well with changes,” he said.
“But I could try,” she insisted. “I have given considerable thought as to how our meeting—our first real, cordial meeting—might be accomplished.”
Lewis crossed his arms. “Have you?”
“You need not sound so frustrated by me.”
“I am not frustrated with you,” Lewis said.
“Youare.”
Lewis shook his head. “I am worried, and I have every reason to be.”
His grandmother looked pained. “I know that I am not the easiest person to take care of.”
Lewis winced, for he had thought that same sentiment many times. Did his grandmother know that he had? She did not sound especially accusatory, just a little sad. Resigned.
“I wish that I was well,” she continued. “I do. I regret that I am a burden on you.”
“You are not a burden on me.”
“Even if you say otherwise, I know that I am.”
Lewis ran his head through his hair and sighed deeply. “Please,” he said gently. “You are my family, and I love you. I am pleased to care for you.”
He wished that was entirely true, but it was not. If he was fortunate, his grandmother would not hear the lie in his words.
“The young lady is also my family, and I want to meet her,” his grandmother said. “I am willing to work hard and let her become a part of my life. I care about you, and she is a part of your life. Ishouldknow her.”
Lewis stared at his grandmother for a long moment. Her eyes were determined, something which he seldom saw in her expression, and she looked—in that moment—like she might be invincible. “I believe that you want to try,” Lewis said, softening his voice. “But what if she upsets you again? It is safer to delay this meeting.”
“I suspect you wish to delay itforever.”
“Not forever,” Lewis said. “Just until you are both prepared.”
“And if I leave that decision to you, I will never again see the young Duchess,” his grandmother complained. “I will not demand an answer from you at once, but soon, I will want one. If I am to be more prepared for her arrival, I need to know when she is coming.”
Lewis said nothing, but he suspected that his grandmother was right. He would have found reason after reason to deny the two women the opportunity to meet once more.
“She will come with you,” she continued. “During your usual time. That way, I will already be anticipating visitors. And it will be difficult. I am certain that—that I will be stricken with some sudden fear by her arrival, but I will do my best to remain calm. I can take laudanum beforehand, even.”
“You detest laudanum,” Lewis said quietly.
