Anger. Fury. She was mine, the two of us here alone…
No, not yours! Not yours at all.
But maybe she could have been…
He could barely see through the black haze that had come over his vision. What were they doing alone together in the stable? Did the man have his hands on her? Was he kissing her? Were they…lovers?
You have no right to care! She is not yours. Will never be yours!
Then God! Why did he want to kill the man she was in the stable with? Why did he want to drag her away from him and cover her with his body, claim her in the most primal way, keep her with him for always? He realized he had been holding his breath, and let it out with a growl.
He moved away from the window and left the cottage. He was standing in front of the door when Willa emerged from the stable, the man following behind her, leading his horse by the reins. She stopped short when she saw Drust there, across the yard. The other man put his hand on her arm and leaned to whisper in her delicate, perfect ear.
“Is that your warrior, Pet?He is looking at me with murder in his eyes.That’s a good sign, is it no’?”He frowned, considering.“Should I retrieve my sword, do ye think?”
Willa shook her head. “He’s notmywarrior.”At least not yet.“And he isn’t healed enough to fight, so leave your sword be and don’t provoke him.”
“Och, lass, we shall see. Perhaps I shall call his bluff. But if he tries to kill me, I leave it to ye to come to my rescue.”
Willa turned to smile up at Will, playfully cuffing him in the arm. “Damn you!”
He rubbed his arm, pretending she had actually hurt him. “Willa lass, I see what I see. The man has already claimed ye in his heart. He just doesna ken it yet. And Maura said…”
“I know what Maura said. Thank you Will, for looking in on me.” She squeezed his hand affectionately. “And give your lovely wife a hug from me, won’t you?”
“Aye, of course.She will be happy to see ye again… when this is all over.Ye must visit.”
Willa’s bright smile faltered. When it’s all over… She had somehow been able to pretend to herself that things weren’t so bad, that hope was just around the corner. Maura had helped so much; her natural charm and optimism drowning out the worst of it. And then she had the distraction of caring for Drust. But the truth was that her family’s home,her only home, was taken, her parents were both dead, and a man she had actually considered marrying was responsible. She knew James would eventually take back the castle and lands, she had to believe that he would, but it would not be easy. There was so much unrest and upheaval, who could they possibly turn to for help if the Mac Coinnachs would not? She shuddered, and a lone tear slid slowly down her cheek.
Will saw it and wrapped her in his arms. “Och, lass! Dinna cry. Everything will be well again, ye’ll see. Why even now James meets with lairds from nearby clans to see what can be done. And for now, ye are safe and well, and that is all that matters, aye?”
Willa nodded and reluctantly stepped back out of his warm embrace. “Yes… yes. I’m fine, truly, I just… I’m fine. You should go now. It will be dark soon enough.”
He regarded her uncertainly, as if he wasn’t sure he should leave, but Willa knew how badly Will would want to get home to his wife, and that pull would be much stronger than any worry he might have for her. “Aye”, he agreed. There will be a bright moon to travel by tonight, but I have a ways to go. But please, take care, Pet.”
He leaned down to kiss her cheek, and suddenly she felt so very much alone.
She stood and waved to him as Will rode off into the woods, silently wishing him a safe journey. The light was fading fast as the sun sunk farther behind the hills and still she stood there numbly, not sure what to do next.
She felt rather than heard someone behind her. The fine hairs on the back of her neck stood up on end. She turned slowly around to see Drust standing there, arms crossed, jaw set. He looked… angry. Why on earth would he be angry?
Drust had pretended indifference, but he was having a harder and harder time keeping up the ruse. He grew increasingly restless. Who was this man to the lass? They knew each other, that much was obvious, but they seemed…friendly. And she obviously held affection for him. It was in the very way she looked at him.
Suddenly he wanted nothing more but for Willa to look athimthat way, as if he meant something to her, as if she cared for him. But that was all he could have from her. After all, he had taken a vow to be naught but a warrior… one of the elite. No women, no family of his own to get in the way of his duty. That vow had never chafed him so much as it did now. And not until now would he ever have thought of breaking it.
He returned to stand by the window, wanting to watch the man leave, to see him gone from here so that he could keep pretending to himself that he had such a sweet life as this. Will was leading his horse, and Willa was tucking a sack into his saddle bag with a smile. She had obviously packed him some food for his journey. They walked together to where the trail snaked off into the woods before pausing to say their farewells. She took his hand. He embraced her with his whole body, rocking her gently, comforting her. Because she would miss him?
Drust’s grip tightened on the sill of the window, his knuckles turning white. He heard a low growl rise up from his throat, the sound of a wild animal. He was compelled by his anger to open the door and walk out into the yard, though what he meant to do, he couldn’t say. Just make the ugly scene stop somehow. But at last the man had mounted his horse and was riding away, though he looked back once and locked with Drust’s gaze, raising one eyebrow as if in challenge. Drust narrowed his eyes.
Willa stood with her back to him still, occasionally lifting a hand to wipe at her face. Was she crying? He moved closer, but she did not turn until he stood directly behind her. When she turned, he saw that she had indeed been crying; a large round tear rolled down her cheek, and without thinking, he reached out and caught it on his fingertip. Unexpected tenderness threatened to overwhelm his rage.
“What is wrong, lass? Did he hurt ye?”
God, he wanted her to say yes, so that he could go after the man and hurt him; punish him for touching her and for holding her affection. She washisangel. She had savedhim.
She shook her head and tilted her chin up, visibly trying to pull herself together. Drust found that he almost didn’t want her to. He wanted to be the one to comfort her, he wanted her to sob in his arms, if it meant that he had an excuse to hold her. She had lethimhold her…
She took a step back, looking embarrassed that he had caught her crying. “I’m… I’ll be fine. It’s just that a lot has happened lately. I guess it just caught up with me, that’s all.”
