Understanding what he meant, Boarstaff sat on the stone floor near the edge of darkness. "Come here, then."
For a moment, he thought Sebastian might refuse. Then he heard movement in the shadows, and Sebastian emerged just enough for Boarstaff to make out his silhouette. His movements were different, less of the mechanical precision Boarstaff had grown accustomed to, more natural but uncertain, as if he were relearning how to use his own body.
In the dim crystal light, Boarstaff could see that Sebastian was unclothed, his form a patchwork of shadows. What littleBoarstaff could make out seemed... wrong somehow, different from the Sebastian he remembered.
"You can touch me," Sebastian said, his voice closer now, "but only my hips and thighs. Nothing higher, nothing lower."
Boarstaff frowned. "Why?"
"Because I still need to finish healing."
Simple. Direct. Boarstaff nodded, then realized Sebastian might not be able to see the gesture in the darkness. "I understand."
Sebastian eased closer, and Boarstaff gently guided him onto his lap. Sebastian was lighter than he remembered, and Boarstaff became acutely aware of his body's response to their proximity. They'd had sex before, but this felt different, more vulnerable. He tried to focus on Sebastian's need rather than his own desire.
Before Sebastian could reach for his neck, Boarstaff whispered: "Can I kiss you?"
Sebastian hesitated, then: "Yes. But don't touch me anywhere else."
Boarstaff reached up slowly, finding Sebastian's jaw in the darkness. He leaned forward, bringing their lips together in a kiss that started gentle but quickly deepened with unexpected hunger. Sebastian's body trembled slightly against him, and Boarstaff forced himself to keep his hands only where permitted, resting lightly on Sebastian's hips.
He desperately wanted to explore, to understand what Sebastian had done to himself in the darkness, but he respected the boundaries. Under his fingers, he felt unfamiliar textures, ridges and hollows where there should be smooth skin, strange patterns of wounds in various stages of healing.
When they broke apart, Sebastian moved to Boarstaff's neck without a word. The first touch of his lips sent tingles across Boarstaff's skin. Then came the sharp pain of fangs piercingskin, quickly giving way to an intense sensation that blurred the line between pleasure and pain.
Boarstaff couldn't help the soft moan that escaped him. His hands tightened slightly on Sebastian's hips, feeling the unfamiliar landscape of his body. Whatever Sebastian had done to himself, it had been extensive. Violent.
"I'm sorry," Boarstaff whispered, embarrassed by his reaction.
Sebastian continued feeding, taking what he needed with gentle care.
The pull of blood leaving Boarstaff’s body was impossible to ignore, a strange intimacy unlike anything he'd experienced before their first time. He focused on his breathing, on the weight of Sebastian in his lap, on the boundaries he'd promised to respect.
When Sebastian finally pulled away, he stayed close, his face still hidden in shadow. "Never apologize for wanting me," he said, his voice stronger than before. "I'll be back in your bed soon enough... if you'll welcome me again."
Boarstaff reached up, careful to touch only Sebastian's face, cradling his jaw. "You're always welcome in my arms."
The words hung between them, a promise, an anchor for whatever transformation Sebastian was undergoing.
"I'm sorry you had to endure this alone." Boarstaff gestured vaguely at what he could sense but not fully see of Sebastian's changed body.
"I needed to do it alone this time." The emphasis on "this time" wasn't lost on Boarstaff. Unlike his first transformation, surrounded by orc shamans and healers, the second had been Sebastian's choice, Sebastian's doing.
Boarstaff wanted to ask what had happened in the darkness, but the boundaries Sebastian had set were clear. Instead, he asked, "Will you be alright?"
Sebastian shifted slightly, still careful to keep most of his body in shadow. "Eventually. The Tree's magic is helping, but..." A pause. "I'm still discovering what I've become."
Silence stretched between them. Boarstaff could sense Sebastian's reluctance to discuss his transformation further. Respecting this, he shifted to the other concern weighing on his mind.
"Do you know what's coming? When they attack?"
"The vampires have many strategies. I know they'll come, but how and when... I can't predict." Sebastian's hand found Boarstaff's in the darkness, fingers intertwining with unexpected strength. "But I'll join you when I can. When I'm ready."
The promise hung between them, weighted with everything unsaid. Boarstaff felt the rough texture of Sebastian's palm against his own, so different from before.
"And until then?"
"Until then, I need darkness. And time." Sebastian's grip tightened briefly. "I've never been allowed to heal on my own terms before."
