She would rather not have children than give children an unhappy home life.
“You don’t have to decide anything any time soon,” Mark said, waving a hand as he leaned back in his chair. “You’re both young and you deserve to take some time to settle into this situation before you make life-changing decisions.”
Kira nodded. “Oh, I agree.”
Susan laughed lightly. “That’s good. Our Joshua has always been the sort to make snap decisions and stick to them. I remember one time when he was about five—”
“I don’t think it’s necessary to talk about my childhood,” Joshua cut in sharply. He pushed his chair back and piled his cutlery onto his plate, even though he hadn’t even eaten half of it. “Thanks for dinner. We have to go now.”
And just like that, he was back to the same man she’d known for years. Kira remained seated, watching him warily. She had thought he was different before, and ended up with her heart shattered. This was just like then. She thought that things were going well, that he wasn’t such a harsh person. Then, without warning, he just… did that.
“Kira,” Joshua said without looking at her.
She deliberately scooped up some mashed potatoes. “I’m not finished eating.”
Joshua’s nostrils flared. He seemed on the verge of saying something—maybe yelling at her—but then he merely carried his plate into the kitchen. Silence fell over them. Susan and Mark gave each other significant looks as though they were having a silent conversation. It was rather rude of them to exclude Kira when she was sitting right there. Her spine was rigid as she ate, no longer tasting the food.
With her gaze trained on her plate, she kept scolding herself. Didn’t she learn this lesson before? They’d never been friends. She had flown under his radar and was happy to do so. Other than Gwen, she didn’t have any friends. Chelsey didn’t really count, since she was responsible for her younger sister. But one night, Kira had done something very, very stupid. She had put on her favorite swimsuit and went to a beach bonfire.
At the time, she had thought it was a chance to reinvent herself. She had been explicitly invited by one of the popular girls, and she had stupidly believed her. Looking back, it could have gone a lot worse than Kira showing up and everyone else pinching their noses and running away as though she were that smelly.
She had sat on the sand, crying softly, when she heard footsteps. Joshua had approached. He didn’t ask what happened, what she was doing there, anything like that. She had stayed where she was, willing to endure whatever torment he had in mind. Instead, he’d put on some music, built the fire up, and sat on the other side of it, facing the ocean. They had been there for over an hour, not saying a word.
After that, she would often return to that beach whenever she was feeling particularly overwhelmed and remember sitting in the firelight, listening to music, and watching Joshua Woods watch the ocean. Then, he started showing up at the same time. First, they existed in the same place in silence. Kira started to cautiously initiate a conversation.
She thought they were bonding. She shared with him things she’d never told anyone. Then one night, under the full moon, talking had moved to a kiss. A kiss that swept them away and… well. No need to go over that again.
“Ah, look at that. The pitcher’s empty,” Mark said as he filled his glass. “I’ll just jump into the kitchen to refill this.”
“Thank you, dear,” Susan said.
They shared a brief kiss before Mark headed into the kitchen. Susan’s expression grew serious as she shifted her chair a little closer to Kira. “Are you alright?”
Kira nodded quickly. Maybe she should have taken the excuse to leave earlier. Then she wouldn’t be avoiding hermother-in-law’s eyes. Funny how she could be so angry before and feel like she was about to start crying now.
Susan hesitated. “Look, I’m not one of those mothers who thinks her son can do no wrong. If there’s anything you need to discuss, please don’t hesitate to come to me. And you can visit any time you like.”
“Thank you. But actually, I just remembered I have an early morning tomorrow and—” Kira started to push back, but Susan reached over and put a hand on her arm.
“Honey, please don’t. I’m not going to start turning this into a discussion about marriage. I’m not going to tell you to give him a chance or be easy on him. The fact is, the Council is a bunch of a-holes for demanding this of both of you. But regardless of the circumstances, neither you nor Joshua has any excuse to take it out on each other.” Susan’s voice was soft yet somehow rang with a note of steel.
Kira hesitated, not sure what to say in response to that. Was it more of a warning or an olive branch?
I thought he was my mate once. He made it clear he wasn’t.How would that go down? Probably like a lead balloon. Regardless of how kind and welcoming Susan was, Joshua was her son. She wasn’t going to pick Kira’s side in anything.
“I mean it,” Susan said softly. “Don’t stay with him just because of council expectations. Things have changed a lot around here, but they’ll still throw their weight around until people start telling them no.”
But what would the consequences against me be? How am I supposed to be the one to say no? The pack—
She cut that thought short. Maybe this shouldn’t be about what the pack thought. Perhaps this was really just about herand Joshua. Did she want to leave him? Yes. But not in a way that would embarrass him or lessen his influence on the pack. He couldn’t keep making things better if nobody respected him.
“Thank you.” Kira carefully extracted herself from Susan’s grip. “It’ll be fine. This is all still very new, and I’m sure Joshua is just feeling… overwhelmed. I shouldn’t have talked about having kids. He’s made it clear he doesn’t want children.”
Susan’s eyes widened. “He did?”
Apparently, that was something that he hadn’t shared with his mother.Or maybe it’s just me. He doesn’t want me to have his children.“He didn’t have a choice in this either. So we just have a lot we need to take care of.”
Why was she defending him? And also, what if that was more true than she realized? He did threaten that he’d marry Chelsey instead if she left, or was that a warning?
