“I’m sad,” Finnvid said softly. “And a bit worried.”
“I don’t like that.” Theos was surprised by how true that statement was. He didn’t like—hehated—the thought of Finnvid being unhappy. He wanted to protect him from it, somehow, but he didn’t think there was a way. Well, not for most of it. He couldn’t do anything about the sadness, but maybe he could help with the worry. “I’ll take care of you. In Windthorn. You can stay with me, and I can pay for your food, just like before. We’ll find you something to do. Something worthwhile, something you like.” What else? What else would someone like Finnvid be worrying about? “I’ll try to . . . I’m not sure. I’ll talk to people. I’ll help them understand that the Elkati— I won’t lie. I won’t say the Elkati aren’t murdering cowards. But I’ll make sure people understand that the trouble started in Windthorn. I’ll make sure that if they’re looking for revenge, they look close to home; that’s where therealbetrayal happened.”
“We could get back to Windthorn and find the warlord completely in charge. He may have already killed the Sacrati there, and taken over the city.”
“Then I’ll find somewhere else safe for you until I can get things sorted out.”
Finnvid snorted. “If I wanted to stand with you when you were fightingmypeople, do you think I wouldn’t want to be with you while you fought your own?”
“I’d like it better if you were somewhere safe.”
“And I’d like it better if you came with me to that safe place, and left all this mess behind. But you’re not going to do that. I know it. So . . . I’ll stay with you, and we’ll be unsafe together.”
Finnvid’s loyalty was touching, but it was Theos’s own reaction to it that was truly overwhelming. Theos had experienced comradeship all his life, with the Torians in general and then the Sacrati in particular. He knew what it was like to care about the group more than he cared about himself. But this? For him to care just as much about one single person as he did for all of the Sacrati combined? And for that person to care about him in return?
Theos tugged at the leather bracer on his right wrist. Two buckles undone, and then he ran his fingers over the bracelets. Where was it? That one, with the rounded, smooth surface. He stretched it so the gap between the ends widened, and then he slipped it off his wrist and reached out to find Finnvid’s hand. He wrapped the cool metal around warm flesh and squeezed the ends shut tight.
“For me?” Finnvid whispered.
Theos just nodded. He wasn’t sure he could trust his voice, and he wouldn’t be able to find the right words anyway.
“I wish I could see it.”
“I’m still not sure that you can’t, with your night vision. But if you can’t see it now, you can see it tomorrow.” Tomorrow, and the day after, and many days after that.
They slept, then, both of them exhausted, and woke early the next morning to begin walking again. Several times through the day, Theos caught Finnvid looking at the bracelet, or running the fingers of his other hand over the smooth metal, and each time he saw that, he felt . . . he didn’t know what to call it. Proud, somehow, and tender, and strangely hopeful. It was hard to understand, and certainly would have been hard to explain, but he didn’t think he reallyhadto explain it. Because the only person who needed to know how he felt was Finnvid, and every time he touched the bracelet, he turned and smiled at Theos, and Theos smiled back at him. And that was enough.
Chapter Thirty
They encountered no more Elkati. When they reached the Windthorn border, Finnvid paused before following Theos across. He was leaving his home, and he didn’t see how he could ever return. Not only because they wouldn’t want him, he reminded himself, but because he didn’t wantthem. Not on their terms. So he rubbed his bracelet for luck, kept his gaze on Theos, who had turned around and was waiting patiently, and moved forward.
“It feels like forever,” he said quietly.
Theos took his hand. “Nothing’s forever. Especially right now.”
Finnvid tugged his hand free. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
“Better? I don’t know. It’s just . . . true. It’s supposed to make you feel truer.”
They had a fire when they camped that night, for the first time since their trip had started, and Finnvid found himself almost mesmerized by the dancing flames and the warmth. He leaned back into Theos and let himself be enveloped by it all. Another moment he wanted to claim and keep and never leave. But as Theos said, nothing was forever.
They walked on and on, until one night when they made camp Theos said they shouldn’t have a fire. “We’re close to the valley, now. I don’t want to call attention to us until I know what’s going on.”
“And how will you discover what’s going on?”
“Tomorrow morning I’ll walk down to the sentries’ post and see if they try to kill me. If they do, it’s a bad sign. If they don’t, it’s just . . . undecided.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“You shouldn’t.”
“Will it make them more likely to attack? If I’m there? Would it be bad for you?”
“I don’t think so,” Theos said.
“Then I’ll be there.”
Theos looked like he was thinking about arguing, but then shrugged. “Hopefully it will all be fine.”
