Finnvid was silent for a while. He half turned and made sure there was melted snow in the little pot over the lamp, then checked the butter in the lamp reservoir, then nodded and looked back at Theos. “Women have much more freedom in Windthorn. They’re useful, for a variety of things, and they get tochoosewhat they want to be. If I were a woman, I’d want to be Torian. If I had a sister or a daughter, I’d want her raised in the Empire.” It was a huge concession, and Finnvid was relieved when Theos didn’t say anything smug. He just reached over and squeezed Finnvid’s knee.
But Finnvid wasn’t finished. “If I had a son, though? If I could go back in time and chose for myself, or for anyman? I’d want him born in Elkat, or some other valley wheremenhave a choice! There’s more to the world than war, Theos!” He saw the Sacrati frown, but it was too late to stop now. So he said, “Is there even a plan? When the Empire has spread to all corners of the world, as I know you’re sure it will, what then? If half of the people born are only good as killing machines, won’t they just turn around and start killing each other? Isn’t that what’s starting to happen already? Where does it end, Theos? What kind of system is that?”
Finnvid risked a glance in Theos’s direction then and wished he hadn’t. The Torian was glaring at the ceiling as if he were about to attack it. But theceilinghadn’t just insulted Theos’s way of life.
“I’m not saying being able to fight isn’t important,” Finnvid added quickly. “And obviously you can do other things—with your survival skills, and your physical—well, perfection, I guess. I’m not saying it’s worthless. It’s very impressive, really. But if someoneisn’tas physically blessed as you, or if he just has different interests, he can still contribute, can’t he? He can still be something worthwhile?”
“Maybe he could be an archer, and ambushrealsoldiers when they think they have a truce.” The tone was cool and casual, but the words cut.
Finnvid’s nod felt jerky. “Aye. Or maybe something better. Maybe he could do something thatdoesn’tinvolve taking lives.”
Theos rolled to his knees, and if his wounds hurt, he showed no sign of it on his face. “I’m going outside,” he said, as if it wasn’t obvious.
“What for?”
“Air. A piss. Stretch my legs. Check the weather.”
Finnvid didn’t have a response, and Theos clearly wasn’t waiting for one. So Finnvid stayed behind and started chopping jerky into tiny bits to put in the broth, and when he was done with that he straightened the blankets and checked that his medicines were in order and then added a little more butter to the lamp. And still, Theos didn’t return.
He was wearing his undershirt and thin leggings. That was all. He might have passed out, or been attacked, or . . . he might have . . . run away? Yes, he might have decided he’d rather freeze to death in the wilderness than go back inside the den while Finnvid was in there preaching about how nasty Torians were.
Finnvid sighed and headed for the tunnel. He stuck his head out into the cold, and Theos was right there, crouched down with his hands tucked in his armpits, leaning against the wall of the trench. “Come in,” Finnvid said. He tried to make it sound like a suggestion.
And it worked. Theos leaned forward, almost falling onto his hands and knees, and he shuffled toward the tunnel as Finnvid backed up into the main part of the den.
“You need to drink some broth,” Finnvid said, trying to duplicate the tone of voice that had worked outside. When Theos wordlessly reached for the cup, Finnvid felt like a genius. But he decided not to press his luck, and just sat quietly as Theos drank the broth. Then Theos reached over and pulled a blanket from his bed to wrap around his own shoulders.
“I have sons,” Theos finally said. “Most of them are like me. They’ll be good soldiers. Good Torians. But a few of them . . . I don’t know. They might not. Maybe they’d have been better off somewhere else, somewhere they could be . . . something else.”
Finnvid was afraid to say anything that might break their fragile truce. But he was even more afraid to say nothing and leaveTheosfragile. “Maybe they can be something else without leaving Windthorn,” he suggested. “Maybe change . . . maybe it doesn’t have to be bad. The warlord has done horrible things, and he’s gone about it all wrong. And it sounds likesomeof the things he wants wouldn’t be good for most Torians. Still, maybe there are afewchanges that could be made.”
Theos didn’t answer, but when Finnvid eased over to him and wrapped his arms around the Sacrati’s shoulders, Theos leaned back into him and relaxed.
That night, they slept twined around each other, and the next morning Finnvid checked Theos’s dressings and spread more honey on the deeper wound on his thigh. The swelling was going down, and the redness was receding, but Theos’s body was still tight under Finnvid’s hand and his breath quavered when Finnvid touched him.
Actually, Theos’s breathing was extremely irregular. Was something wrong?
Oh. Finnvid had been so intent on his task that he’d forgotten the area he was working in. Once he stopped staring at the wound, it was hard to ignore Theos’s cock, still covered by the blanket but hard and erect under the fabric.
“Sorry,” Theos said. “Ignore it.”
No, Finnvid didn’t think he wanted to do that. Instead, he shifted closer and eased his hand under the blanket. Just on Theos’s thigh, at first, and then up to his stomach. He left it there, eased it down a finger’s breadth, and then retreated hurriedly. He tried again, but lost his nerve and brought his hand back to Theos’s stomach.
Theos groaned. “Are you punishing me? What did I do?”
Finnvid’s laugh was more like a giggle. “Sorry. I just—you know.”
“Not really.” Theos took a deep breath, then released it. “But, okay. I can take it.”
Finnvid kept his hand where it was, his smallest finger tickling and teasing the top of Theos’s hair, and squirmed down so he was lying on his side, pressed up tight beside Theos. He could feel his own cock hardening against Theos’s leg, and knew Theos could feel it too. “Really, it’s okay? If I just . . . If we . . . Can I just . . .”
“You can do what you want,” Theos said. He leaned over and kissed Finnvid’s forehead. “You’re a cruel man, but I’m strong.”
Finnvid slid his hand lower, gathered his courage, and wrapped his fingers around Theos’s shaft, and was amazed by how right it felt. Hownatural. He slid his hand up and down, shifting the loose skin over the hard flesh, and Theos sucked air in through his teeth. He moaned a little, his eyes closing, then whispered, “I take it back. You’re very kind.”
Finnvid was causing that reaction. He was lying in a shelter he’d built, with a Sacrati he was nursing back to health, and he was the one making this strong warrior gasp and groan and tighten his fingers in his blankets. “I wasn’t exactly appreciated when I was growing up in Elkat,” he whispered. “I wasallowedto look at trees and bugs, but I wasn’t encouraged. I was supposed to be a man. Supposed to marry a woman. Men aren’t completely free in Elkat, either.”
Theos opened one eye. “That’swhat you’re thinking about right now?”
