She glowered right back. “I wouldn’t use such a hostile word, no.”
My dad’s handsome face softened minutely. He turned to me. “Okay, what I meant to say is … I’m worried about you.”
I looked at Grace. She nodded and gave me a concerned but reassuring smile.
“Didn’t you hear what I said about my job? What my boss said?”
“Aye. And it’s illegal. They can’t fire you.”
“Not outright. But they’ll find a way to do it legally. I’ve seen it before. They’re big on loyalty and team player stuff at Pennington’s. I’ve worked too hard to lose my position now.”
Dad slumped into his seat. “So, you’re going to lie to the entire world and get married to a man you don’t love?”
“It’ll help Baird’s image too,” I responded weakly.
“I think this is a very big, fraudulent plan, and maybe Iwouldn’t be so worried if it weren’t for the fact that Will broke your heart five weeks ago,” Grace offered quietly.
Dad nodded. “What Grace said.”
Despite my hammering pulse, I firmly pronounced, “I’m doing this. It’s a blip of time in the grand scheme of things. It’s not illegal because we’re not doing it for a visa or something like that.”
“I think you’ll find falsely making a statement in your marriage vows is considered perjury in this country and therefore is illegal,” Grace relayed.
My heart stopped. “Grace!”
“What? I’m just letting you know what you’re really gearing up to do.”
Damn it. I didnotknow that.
Was it going to stop me, though?
Nope.
“Well, I didn’t want to lie to you guys when I’ll have to lie to everyone else. I told you the truth. But … you can’t tell Lockie.” Guilt consumed me. “He’s too young. He might tell the wrong person and then I really will get into trouble.”
Dad’s jaw clenched before he unclenched it and snapped, “You’re going to lie to your wee brother? What if he gets attached to Baird? You know he’s a Caley fan and already worships the ground that bloke walks on.”
“It’s just for a little while. Stop acting like I’m committing a big crime that’s going to emotionally scar everyone.” I stood up, trembling. “Except for that one time I went to a club with Layla the sociopath when I was sixteen, I have always done the right thing. The expected thing. I decide for once in my life to take a risk and do something a wee bit mad that will help my career, and you’re acting like I’ve robbed a goddamn bank!”
Dad and Grace stared at me stunned.
Iwas stunned.
The first year with them had been the most tumultuous. I was a teenager, devastated about my mum and terrified Dad would fail me; therefore, I’d acted out quite a bit. Until it occurred to me if I kept acting out, I would really push Dad and Grace away.
Instead, I became obsessed with people-pleasing. In a way, I also think it was a form of absolution with other people because deep down, part of me believed I was in the wrong for leaving my mum behind.
I’d people-pleased with Will too. We hadn’t compromised on anything. I’d just given in so I wouldn’t upset him or rock the boat.
Baird, it seemed, made me feel a wee bit reckless.
The fear of upsetting my parents was like a sickness in my gut. I stood there, frozen, waiting for them to react.
Grace sighed heavily. “You’re right, sweetheart. I mean, I still don’t agree with the plan, but it is your life and it’s not like you’re hurting anyone.”
“Lying isn’t hurting? Lying isn’t selfish?” Dad glared at his wife.
Remorse worsened my nausea. I didn’t want Grace and Dad to fight.
