“No!” I yanked his hands off my face. “Don’t.” Fear of being played, of having a heart that was still bloody broken ripped apart again by this man, had me shoving at his chest.
He was a solid wall of muscle trapping me against the island.
“Eilidh—”
“No!” I yelled in his face and he didn’t even flinch. “You don’t get to decide you want me because some other guy has me. I’m not a toy.”
“Does he have you?” Fyfe glowered.
“None of your business.”
“Have you slept with him?”
“How fucking dare you,” I hissed. “Get out of my way.”
Relief softened his expression. And there was a tiny hint of smugness there too. “You haven’t slept with him.”
Ugly resentment bubbled over. “Doesn’t mean I won’t.”
His eyes flashed with jealousy. Then his cheek brushed mine and his hands gripped my hips. Fyfe’s lips touched my ear. “If you fuck him, I dare you not to close your eyes and imagine it’s me inside you.”
That dream, that bloody vivid sex dream I had all those months ago, popped into my head. There had been dreams of Fyfe since, but none had felt as real as that. Arousal flushed through me, my lower belly trembling with it.
Bastard!
With all my strength, I pressed my palms to his chest and shoved him away.
Fyfe didn’t even stumble as he took a step back, gaze hungry, like he knew exactly how my body reacted to his words.
“Go fuck yourself,” I spat before I marched toward the front door.
“I’d rather fuck you!” he called.
I stumbled and whirled around. “You did not just say that.”
His expression was determined as he strode toward me, but I held up my hands, warding him off. Fyfe halted, frustration evident in every bristling line of his body. “Look, I can admit I was jealous when that prick said he was dating you. But I don’t want you because someone else has you.”
“He doesn’t have me,” I couldn’t help but insert breathlessly.
“I know he doesn’t have you. Iknowyou, Eilidh.” Fyfe’s countenance turned pained. “When you told me you loved me, I truly believed that I wasn’t worthy of it. That I couldn’t protect that love. Orbewhat you deserve. But … a lot has changed in the last few weeks. Maybe I’m not the man I thought I was. Maybe I can be better. Maybe … I can try to be worthy of someone as extraordinary as you. All I know is, when you’re here with me and Millie, it feels right. The thought of you moving on with someone else scares the shit out of me.”
Oh.
I understood now.
Crushing disappointment flooded in and my words were cooler than I intended as I replied, “A competent nanny will provide that same sense of security.” I turned and rushed toward the door.
“Eilidh, please!”
Millie’s cries filled the house. I winced, guilt riding me, as I used the distraction to flee the man who had broken my heart more times than I cared to admit.
Twenty-Four
EILIDH
Fueled by my indignation, renewed hurt, and the insidious hope Fyfe had sparked—hope I knew I had to squash—I drove to Cameron’s bungalow in a mad dash to clear things up with the doctor.
“How dare you?” I pronounced as soon as he opened his front door.
