The pregnancy, the scans, the time to process my new future as a father. Millie being born. Holding her in my arms the first day she came into this world. Giving her the knowledge that her father was with her from day one. I could never say that now.
Pamela had stolen that from me.
Rage flooded me and I gritted my teeth against it.
I couldn’t let that emotion in. It would consume me.
It was so nice to be able to take the time to clean, but I didn’t want to leave Eilidh out there alone with Millie for too long. There hadn’t been a chance to apologize to her yet, and I couldn’t take advantage of her kindness.
As I got out of the shower and changed in my bedroom, I heard voices coming from downstairs. Curious, I hurried toward them, recognizing them as I drew closer. Therefore, I wasn’t surprised when I walked into the living room to find Lewis, Callie, and Harley there with Eilidh and Millie.
Harley broke into a smile. Quite a few of her teeth had come in. Millie’s wee cheeks were red from teething. She seemed worse at night with it, so I’d ordered a soother online, one that I could cool in the fridge before she chewed on it.
“Bah!” Harley dashed toward me, arms flailing, and I hurried to pick her up. She’d already grown since I’d seen her last.
“Hey, Scooter.” I’d called her Scooter as a joke at first to annoy Lewis, but it just kind of stuck. And it suited her now that she was toddling all over the place. I cuddled Harley against me, taking her over to Eilidh who held Millie. “Have you met Millie?”
“Aye.”
I froze, my head whipping around to gape at my niece. “Did … did you just say aye?”
“It’s one of her handful of words.” Callie stepped up to us, stroking a hand down her daughter’s back. “She can saymum,dad,no, andaye.”
I’d known about mum and dad but not the no and aye. I chuckled, pressing a kiss to her chubby cheek. “A girl who knows what she wants.”
“I doubt very much she understood what you asked her.” Callie chuckled. “But no and aye being her only words makes for some hilarious conversations.”
We shared an easy smile and for a second, I almost forgot how awkward things were between us all.
As if she saw the realization on my face, Callie’s smile dimmed. “Why don’t I take Harley?” She reached for her daughter. “And you can tell us what’s going on?”
Handing Harley over to her mother, I met Eilidh’s gaze. Millie was snuggled against Eilidh’s neck, her eyelids flickering as if she was fighting sleep. There were new people in her orbit so I understood her curiosity. “You called them?”
“You need your family around you right now, Fyfe.”
Longing and gratitude and remorse overwhelmed me. “Eilidh … I …”
A hand clamped down on my shoulder. Lewis. His expression was sympathetic. “Let’s just focus on Millie for now. How did this happen?”
Lewis had calledwork to tell them he would be late into the office today, and I discovered Callie had left her mum handling the bakery when Lewis called her to tell her I needed them. Filled with gratitude, I relayed the last few days to my friends.
“You did all this in two days?” Callie shook her head in amazement as she took in the living space. Harley was toddling around, picking up Millie’s toys and playing for a wee bit before getting bored and moving on to the next. “Anyone else would be curled up in a ball. I can’t imagine what it would be like if we hadn’t had all those months to prepare for Harley coming.”
“You would just have gotten on with it.” My gaze was on Millie who still slept in Eilidh’s arms. “Millie didn’t ask for this.”
“You could have called social services,” Lewis suggested.
“And if she’s mine? Handing her over to social services would mean putting her in care and for who knows how long while all the legal stuff gets sorted.”
“What if she isn’t yours?” Eilidh’s question was tentative.
“I have people tracking Pamela down. Once I find her, I’ll do my best to find Millie’s father if she isn’t mine. There must be family out there who are happy to look after her. I don’t want her going into the system.”
“She’s more likely to get adopted at this age.” Callie reached out to stroke Millie’s hair. “It might be what’s best for her if her mother could just leave her out in the cold.”
“And all of this is moot if Fyfe is the father,” Lewis added.
My stomach twisted with emotion. At this point, I couldn’t tell if it was fear or dread, and what of.
