I shook my head in reassurance, eyes wide at his visceral reaction. “They didn’t. Thanks to Sloane. She showed up there, ballsy as hell, desperate for money because she was about to be evicted. Pretty soon it was just us three in the room. Nathan locked the door. I … I stupidly mouthed off and he … I think he was going to rape me in front of her.”
Rage filled Jared’s eyes and he slowly lowered himself beside me again.
“She … she stopped him. And I knew then that I didn’t want to go out like that. I didn’t want to experience what Ashton had, and I didn’t want to die. So we all got into a tussle and I grabbed his gun and I shot at him, but it hit her in the arm instead. He …” I could still recall the evil in Nathan’s eyes as he turned on me. “I was just a little rich girl he got off on corrupting. Sloane was different. His kid’s mom. And he thought of her as his possession. He was enraged that I’d shot her. I can … I can still feel his fists. I thought it was never going to stop. But then, it did. With a bang.” I unconsciously eased closer to Jared, lowering my knees from my chest. “Sloane shot him.”
Jared’s eyebrows rose now. “I can’t even picture that.”
“Picture it.” I grinned unhappily. “Sloane is a badass. She got us both out. I don’t know how she managed it because I could barely walk and she was shot, but we got back to her place and I … I told her to call my dad because, despite the past, I knew he’d fix everything.”
“Is that how Sloane ended up here?”
I nodded. “Yeah. My family was so grateful to her that Aria got her a job on the estate to get her away from Andros. And my parents … my dad assumed that the reason for me going off the rails was because of what I knew. About his other woman. I mean, it partly was, so I let him think it. He begged me to go to rehab. I would have gone, anyway. The whole thing with Nathan and Sloane was a huge wake-up call. Aria was so worried about me. I’d never seen her like that. Even my parents were visibly shaken, you know. As angry as I was at them, as much as I wished they were better parents, I knew they loved me in their way. I didn’t want to put them through that, so I went to rehab.” I shrugged.
“And then I just got on with life. I’m not close to my parents because Mamma knows I know she’s living in denial about Dad. And Dad … I think he’s terrified that one day I’ll tell Aria. She’sa daddy’s girl through and through. His first kid, his baby. It would kill him if she saw him in a negative light. And I think he’s just waiting for the ax to fall. If he’d take two seconds to be in a room with me, I could promise him that for her sake, not his, that will never happen.”
Silence fell between us as Jared sat forward, elbows on his knees, and stared at the floor. My heart raced as I pondered what he was thinking.
Finally, he turned to me. “You’ve been carrying all of that by yourself since you were fifteen?”
I nodded.
“I’m sorry, Allegra.”
“People have been through worse. Aria was kidnapped by a stalker. Sloane was almost killed by her ex. Worse things have happened to people.”
“Aye. But they all had folks around them to share that with. You’ve kept these secrets because you either wanted to protect Aria or protect Ashton. But who …” He snatched up my hand, his grip tight. “Who was protecting you?”
I sucked in a teary breath, my vision blurring. “Jared …”
“I don’t know if what I say means anything, but I want you to know that none of it was your fault. As someone who did really awful, stupid shit as an angry kid, I know what it feels like. But I had my grandfather. He knew everything about my past. And having him carry that for me made all the difference. I know our marriage is just a business deal, but our friendship can be as real as you want it to be. I promise you now that you’ll always have it. And I’ll carry this for you. I don’t want you to be alone in it anymore.”
Overwhelming awe and gratitude flooded me and before I could second-guess myself, I leaned in and slid my arms around him, resting my cheek on one of his strong shoulders. Jareddidn’t hesitate. He twisted to face me, my cheek shifting onto his chest instead and he returned my embrace.
I don’t know how long we sat there, holding each other, but I wished it could have lasted forever. His body was strong and hard and warm, and being held by him felt wonderful. Because for the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel alone. I never wanted that feeling to fade.
Yet I knew come morning, there was a huge chance it would.
So I didn’t make a move to leave his arms. I held on as long as I could.
Eighteen
Allegra
The next morning I woke with a pounding head and a dry mouth. It almost felt like a hangover, though I hadn’t had one of those since I was seventeen. As the memory of last night came crashing down on me, my legs shook as I got out of bed. In fact, all of me felt a bit shaky while I showered. There was a strange sense of relief and calm that came with finally telling my truth. But I also felt naked. Vulnerable. Like I’d given Jared the power to hurt me.
With that thought in mind, I apprehensively entered the kitchen.
Jared stood at the stove grilling what smelled like bacon and eggs. At my entrance, he glanced over his shoulder. His smile was soft, his gaze searching. “Good morning.”
I found myself relaxing a bit. “Morning.”
“You hungry?” He switched off the stove and gestured to the buttered bread rolls he’d placed on the counter. “I’m making egg and bacon rolls.”
My stomach growled in answer.
Jared grinned. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
As we settled at the table, I thanked him for the food, and he gestured impatiently for me to dig in. I could feel him watching me as I ate.
