With a cold beer, he went back to his position on the seat on the back porch. A night owl hooted from somewhere, a creature moved in the bushes beyond, creating a rustling of leaves. It was a far cry from the soundtrack of the city – sirens at night, voices outside at all hours, sounds he’d strangely got used to. Perhapsit would be the same here; perhaps he’d grow accustomed to the sounds of relative silence after a while.
Noah and Cassie’s grandparents had lived in this signal box cottage after it was handed down to them by their grandmother’s father, who worked with the railways. Noah and Cassie had come here a lot as kids, always enjoyed the adventure of being allowed to run along the path beside the river, fish using their colourful nets, even go out in a little rowing boat in the summer. The cottage had passed down to Noah and Cassie’s parents but their father had always had a yearning to return to his native New Zealand and that was what they had done. They’d tried to persuade Noah and Cassie to go with them, told them tales of the wonderful life they could have, but by then Noah and Cassie had been settled here and stuck to holiday visits. Those had ended when both of their parents died within three years of each other. Their house in New Zealand had been sold to pay off the mortgage, while the signal box cottage had become Noah and Cassie’s.
Noah and Cassie had agreed to rent the cottage out. He’d gone to London to join an air ambulance team; Cassie had taken a job as a legal secretary about an hour away. But she’d always said eventually she wanted to buy him out, live in the cottage herself. And he’d agreed; it would suit her down to the ground. Cassie’s plans didn’t change when she had Eva either. The flat she was in became even smaller, she said, she was more than ready for a big, big change and with the baby’s father not in the picture – something Cassie rarely talked about, which had Noah wondering whether the guy was married or had something else to hide – she had nothing stopping her.
What stopped Cassie’s lifelong dream and plan was the day she died. Eva was seven months old and Cassie was due to start back at work and utilise their creche. Cassie had always been a planner, she took things in her stride, and maternity leaveand motherhood were no different. Eva was her world, and Cassie was Eva’s. Cassie took her daughter away on a glamping weekend in Dorset where there were other parents and children and she’d planned a couple of hikes with Eva in the rigid baby carrier she wore on her back so well. It all sounded like a dream trip for them both before Cassie returned to work but it hadn’t turned out that way. Cassie had left Eva with another mum and gone horse riding along the beach at sunset. It should’ve been a beautiful experience, but her horse had fallen, taking Cassie with him. The wait for medical help had been a lengthy one due to emergency services being deployed elsewhere. By the time help came, it was too late. And it was something that made Noah seethe if he thought about it too hard.
He would never forget that day. He’d never forget the call informing him of the accident, the doctor’s voice as he gave him the shocking news, the journey from London to Dorset. He’d always remember Eva’s cries mixed with his own as he walked the corridors of the hospital, leaving his sister behind for the very last time. He could still see his good mate Sid putting Eva into the car seat in the back of his own car and transporting them both back to his place, where they had enough baby paraphernalia to allow him to start learning this role of parenthood from scratch.
Eva had been safe in another woman’s arms at the time of Cassie’s accident; she was going to be fine. Except for having no mother, except that he’d become her parent in an instant. It was her and him against the world from now on. And he wasn’t sure that was going to work.
Noah had known ever since Eva was born that he would be the guardian should anything happen to Cassie and he’d assured his sister he’d never have it any other way. The day she told him her wishes, she also informed Noah that in the event of her death, she wanted Eva brought up in Dorset. He’d wrapped herin a hug and said, ‘You and your idyllic countryside life.’ She’d shoved him, told him to take it seriously which he’d insisted he was but really, you never thought those wishes committed to paper would ever really surface, did you? He, like a lot of others, especially siblings who weren’t that different in age, simply accepted the request and life carried on pretty much as normal.
When Noah lost Cassie, he hadn’t immediately decided to head for Dorset. But his circumstances had made it the better option. And once he’d made the decision to relocate, the signal box cottage and life here became the link he saw to giving Cassie’s daughter the future she deserved. Or at least that’s what he’d thought before he realised what a crap parent he was.
Noah finished the last of his beer, but the peace was soon lost when he heard Eva crying. Again.
He let her go on for a couple of minutes but even he, with his lack of parental knowledge, knew that it was the sort of cry that was going to go on and on and on if he didn’t do something.
He tried the other teething ring but this time, Eva wasn’t having any of it. He tried putting on the mobile above her cot but that didn’t work. She was kneeling now, her little fists at the bars of her cot as though she was a prisoner trying to escape the cell she was in.
‘I know how you feel, Eva.’ He moved to pick her up but then smelt the culprit. Most times when he changed the nappy pre-bottle, they were good, but given the aroma snaking its way around right now, it hadn’t happened this time.
He lifted her out and put her onto the changing table mat. She thrashed from side to side, when he took off the nappy the contents would’ve had him stepping back in horror if he didn’t know that you never ever left a baby unattended on a changing table. She twisted again and he tried to steady her, putting his hand in poo, which had him dry-heaving.
It took a good forty minutes to get that messy nappy off, clean her up, put another one on, sort himself out, get Eva calm again. And this time, after he settled her in her cot and pulled her door almost closed, he leant against the wall next to it. ‘I’m sorry, Eva. I’m sorry, Cassie.’
This wasn’t working. He couldn’t do it. He was useless and Eva deserved a proper parent.
And the only option he could see was to find Eva’s biological father. Married or not, as old as the hills or not, he didn’t care. The guy had to be better than him, didn’t he? It’s what Cassie would’ve really wanted, wasn’t it? For her daughter to be raised by a proper parent.
9
Maya had only been off work for a week but they were already into June and coming back today was like a breath of fresh air. A bit of normality. With her people again, doing what she loved. At least it was until she remembered the new recruit. They’d not got off to a very good start at her sister’s wedding reception, but the encounter in the supermarket had been manageable and Maya hoped he was as professional as she was and moved on quickly. The job had to be their focus, nothing else.
Maya began her day the same way as she usually started a shift. She went to the desk she shared with Vik, or whoever was the pilot on the blue team, and checked the handover book, the log and whether any notices had been filed with an aviation authority regarding impending hazards or obstacles that might dictate the flight paths chosen today. There was only one, identifying a crane being used at a construction site twenty miles away, as well as an air show thirty miles in a different direction. The air show wouldn’t be underway until well after her shift was over, but it was good to be aware in case her shift ended up being longer than it should be, something that happened with regularity depending on when the jobs came in and how longthey took. She checked the weather conditions and then it was time to get Hilda ready.
The Whistlestop River Air Ambulance was operational for nineteen hours a day. Two shifts worked those nineteen hours with the time between 2a.m. and 7a.m. uncovered and the helicopter kept inside the hangar. Now it was time for Maya to use the tow cart to pull Hilda out and into position on the helipad before carrying out a thorough pre-flight check of the aircraft.
Training for the air ambulance crews was ongoing. There was always something to keep current with, and once Hilda was ready, it was into the briefing room for the organised session. Today, they focused on transfers and paediatrics, ran through various scenarios to work as a crew and decide what they would do in that situation. Nadia threw different things into the mix – inclement weather, a patient with co-morbidities, gave them locations they could see on the iPad which didn’t have easy surrounds for landing the helicopter.
Maya surreptitiously watched the new recruit. She had to hand it to Noah, he seemed to know what he was doing on the job – he certainly had plenty of past experience – and neither of them had referenced their run-in at her father’s house nor the supermarket. She liked that already about him, that he could leave what happened outside of the workplace behind. All he needed to do was watch what comments he made and not offend a patient or their family. But she supposed they’d all been there; she had. It was a definite learning curve. In the early days with the crew, she’d forgotten their patient’s wife was with Bess and Carl as she rushed to help carry the scoop back to the helicopter. She’d made a remark that she was surprised the patient was still alive, something that really hadn’t been necessary to say, but given the call and what they’d been warned to expect at the scene, she’d been shocked that it wasn’t a fatality. The driver hadcrashed on the motorway, gone through the windscreen of the van he was driving. Maya had hated herself when she registered the patient’s spouse that day. The woman seemed in such shock she hadn’t heard. But Maya had never done it again.
They were only called out on one job during the morning shift – a twenty-minute flight took them to a girl who had fallen from a quad bike and had abdominal injuries and a compound fracture to her lower leg. The crew attended to her and airlifted her to the nearest trauma centre before returning to base. Patient and family liaison nurse Hudson had already been in touch with the family to talk about the girl’s condition and his role from now would be to guide the patient and their loved ones as to what to expect during recovery and to provide a support base in the days ahead.
In the locker room at the end of the shift, Maya changed out of her flight suit and pulled on a pair of jeggings and a fresh T-shirt. When Noah came in, she gave an acknowledging nod in his direction. The locker room was unisex and they were all used to whipping clothes on and off before, during or after shift, but it was always a little strange when someone new worked with the crew.
Time to be polite, pretend they’d never ever had cross words. ‘How are you settling in?’ She turned in time to witness his T-shirt being discarded and the fresh one he’d grabbed from his own locker halfway down a muscular torso. You had to be fit in this job and he definitely lived up to that. Maya was glad Bess hadn’t been here to catch her looking because she’d definitely have a smart remark or two to share right now.
‘Put it this way, I’m glad it was a quiet shift; not sure I could’ve handled a busy one.’
‘Happens sometimes, might be the total opposite next time.’
‘I expect it might be.’
Bess poked her head around the door to the locker room. ‘Who’s up for the pub around 4p.m.? I’m going, Nadia says she’ll make it by six, Hudson is up for it.’
‘Not for me,’ Noah said, and Maya didn’t miss a note of regret in his sigh. ‘I’ve got to get home.’
