‘How’s Jonah doing?’ Nina asked instead. ‘Last time we spoke you said he was a bit down about the amount of school work on his plate.’
‘He’s still adjusting to the newness of it all I think. And he’s a typical boy of eleven – he’s never going to want the workload, but I just keep trying to encourage him. Mind you, it really needs someone else saying it rather than me, if I say he needs to do something, the urgency isn’t always there.’
‘He listens to Leo at the boathouse.’
It took Maeve a while before she said, ‘The boathouse has been good for him.’
‘A male influence.’
‘Yeah.’
Jo brought over their lunches – tuna niçoise salad for Nina, the ham and cheese toastie which came with Molly’s homemade autumn tomato chutney for Maeve.
Nina had had a couple of mouthfuls and considered her question carefully. ‘Have you been in touch with Jonah’s father at all?’
Maeve shook her head.
‘But he gives financial support I assume. I mean, it’s the least he could do if he’s not interested in Jonah – which is a mistake if you ask me, he’s a great kid.’
‘He doesn’t know.’
‘Doesn’t know what?’ She scooped up another forkful of waxy potato with a piece of tuna.
‘The father. He doesn’t know about Jonah.’
Nina stopped chewing. ‘Seriously?’
Maeve covered her face with her hands but didn’t say a word.
Nina put down her cutlery, leant over and took Maeve’s hands away from her face. ‘Do you want to tell me about it?’
‘You must think I’m a dreadful person. Jonah is eleven. I’ve kept my son from his dad for eleven years.’
Nina chose her words carefully. ‘I’m not here to judge.’ She gave Maeve time to gather herself and turned her focus to her lunch. Nobody wanted to feel as though they were seated in front of a one-person jury.
‘At the start it was too hard, too messy. I was living in a whole different country, I was starting over.’
‘Was the pregnancy a surprise?’
‘You could say that. I didn’t realise for a while. And then when I did … I tried to contact the father, but he wasn’t in a great place either.’
Nina shook her head. ‘I’m sure life isn’t supposed to be this complicated.’
Maeve managed a smile. ‘By keeping quiet I made my life this way.’
‘Did you try to contact him again?’
‘Not as such. I heard about him from other people,I knew he’d met someone and was happy, and I didn’t want to ruin that. I knew deep down I had to tell him, but whenever I thought about writing a letter or making another phone call or sending an email, I talked myself out of it. I can’t even explain why, not fully. I was scared I suppose, scared that too much would change. I had this happy little boy, I had a good life, a job.’
‘And now?’ Nina ventured.
‘And now I’m not sure how long I can put off telling Jonah the truth. I knew this was coming, I want this to happen, but knowing it and doing it turned out to be two very different things.’
Nina couldn’t imagine what it was like to have this kind of secret hanging over her. ‘Has Jonah asked for a name? Details?’
‘It’s more questions about how old his father is, what he does for a job, where he lives, how long I knew him for. Up until a year or so ago I just said I met his father briefly at a local haunt and he didn’t ask anything more. He saw it as a bit of an adventure I think. Knowing those basics, his imagination probably has him wondering whether his father is a megastar – in his dreams he’d be the star of the latest Spider-Man movie.’
‘Now we’re talking,’ Nina teased. ‘What? The actor is seriously good-looking.’
