Whatever.Not a nice guy, won’t be easy for me to live here, blah blah. What’s he going to do? Prank me? Replace the sugar with salt? Repaint the living room black? Bring home random women to fuck in our,my, bed? I guess that option would actually suck, but who cares? I’m sure I’ll be fucking other guys for Blanche soon anyway, and he can sit back and watch.Not that he would care, based on how he treated me tonight.
There’s no sign the bathroom will be available anytime soon, so I opt to just go to sleep. I’m anxious from the evening but exhausted from being emotionally drained, so I fall asleep quickly. Rather than being awakened by my alarm clock, I’m jolted by the covers being pulled off, exposing me to the frigid bedroom.What the hell?
“Sorry,Sunshine,” Sasha says, again spitting my name like it’s a curse. “This is my favorite blanket, and I’m cold.”
He’s standing naked, with two oscillating fans behind him that weren’t there before. He tracks my gaze, then clicks the ceiling fan to its highest setting.
“I’ve been getting so hot at night, and sleeping in the cold is healthy. You understand.”
“You can’t just make it like Antarctica in here! I’ll freeze. And put some fucking clothes on!” I’m shivering already, but he just laughs.
Gesturing to the living room, he wraps himself in the blanket but makes sure I have a view of his flaccid cock swinging as he approaches the bed. “You’re welcome to the living room. I hear the couch is very comfy to sleep on.”
With that, the lights are off, and he’s in the middle of the bed, taking up way more space than necessary and acting like a child.
I sit up, ready to reach and unplug the damn fans, when his hand on my wrist stills me. He speaks so lowly I can hardly hear him, and his words are so icy it feels like the room drops another ten degrees.
“If you turn any of these fans off, I’ll burn everything you own in a bonfire so big you’ll be sweating and wishing you had a fan.”
His eyes are unreadable in the dark, and I’m thankful. I’m not sure I want to see what’s in them. The less interaction I have with Sasha now, the better. Moving to the living room, I grab a blanket from the back of the couch and try to get comfy. He never complained when he slept out here, but it’s not where I would choose to sleep. I’ll have to talk to Blanche about a twin bed for the living room, or at least a comfier pullout couch for the space. Maybe Sasha can fuck off and live in one of his houses somewhere far away, and we can forget this bullshit ever happened. I’m considering the grim reality that I’ll never forget him when exhaustion wins again, and I drift into sleep.
Chapter twenty-five
As soon as the door slams behind Lucy on her way out, I flop onto my back and stare at the ceiling, mind racing a thousand miles a minute.Fuck, I thought I could stay here with her.That was obviously never going to happen. Seeing her curled up, cozy and asleep in our bed, made me want to pretend. Pretend that everything that happened today was a nightmare, and we could just wake up tomorrow and continue with our happy little life we’ve just begun to build. But I can’t trust her, and even if I choose the immediate gratification of giving in, I know it will hurt more down the road when she lies. Or whenever I inevitably find out what information she’s been feeding to Lawrence.
My anger hasn’t cooled since our fight, galvanizing instead to something worse that feels like a cancer fused to my spine. Rage, nausea, pain, betrayal…all rolled into one insidious package. There’s no way I’ll sleep well tonight, especially not without Lucy in bed with me. I can’t…I’m not sure how to move on from this. My first thought was revenge, to stay here and make her life miserable until she feels a fraction of the pain she’s caused me.But seeing her tonight, peaceful, was only a reminder of what she fooled me into thinking I could have.
No, there’s no way I can live in the cottage anymore, even to torment her. Tomorrow morning, I’ll tell Blanche something has come up with the business that requires me to go home. Lucy can stay here and keep up her slutty charade without getting anything else from me to pass to Lawrence.
Unless…Icouldmove out of the cottage and stay somewhere else. Close enough to continue working for Blanche but far enough away not to smell Lucy everywhere, reminding me of what I’ve lost. Standing from the bed, knowing I won’t get any sleep tonight, I turn the damn fans off and pace.That’s exactly what I’ll do.It would be too easy on her, me leaving. Even if she never cared about me enough to miss our quiet moments in the cottage, I can still make her life hell with my presence.
My plan solidifies as I send a few texts and email Blanche a meeting request for tomorrow. Dawn breaks, and I feel ready to step out of the cottage for the last time. As soon as I gather my things and say goodbye to my Sunshine.
She’s curled up on the couch under one of her garish blankets, brow furrowed in what seems to be a fitful sleep. This is the last moment the two of us will ever coexist peacefully, and I take my time to feel everything, inhaling and releasing a deep breath. The person I loved didn’t exist, and this human shell that looks like Lucy is just an impostor.If Lucy is even her real name.
Making my way to the kitchen, I turn on every light and start making one more cup of coffee for her, banging every pot and pan I find in the process. Her favorite mug mocks me, and I wait for her rumpled figure to appear before launching it at the wall beside her head. She shrieks and ducks as porcelain fragments scatter, and when she stands again, I can see my wake-up call was successful.
“You son of a bitch! What is wrong with you?” Her shrill voice is music to my ears as I make her coffee.
Smirking, I can’t help but tease her. “Good morning to you, too, Sunshine. I didn’t want you to miss your coffee before I left.”
Her blank stare is delicious as I hold her coffee out, but she makes no move to take it.
“I can’t stand the idea of living with someone who lies so easily, so I’ll be moving out today. Before I go, though, I wanted to give you one last chance to remove yourself from this state and our lives. I told you it won’t be pleasant to stay here, and I’m not sure you’re fully understanding how serious I am.”
I let her see every ounce of what I am. Murderer, assassin, hitman, fixer, bratva heir. All of it. Every bit of ruthless, bottled rage that I’ve kept tamped down while mingling in polite society. The half of me that’s a reasonable man is real—a thoughtful, if pessimistic, soul. But the half of me that’s been molded from a young age to take over the family business is another beast entirely.I knew it had been too long since my last kill, and look now. I’m tipping over the edge.My uncle Pavel always told me that emotions and softness were poison in our business, and it was better to harden yourself early andneverlet a woman get in your way. He never went longer than a month without getting his hands dirty, and now I can see why.
Lucy physically shrinks away from the gleam in my eye, and nausea rolls through me. She shouldn’t be scared of me…of course she should be scared of you.I smirk, crowding her against the counter and invading her space.
“If you show up to the next scene, make sure you read your scriptverywell, Sunshine. I’ve been meaning to tell Blanche that I miss taking a more…creative role at Rendezvous. I’m going to ask her for more input moving forward.” I back away, grabbing the few things I care to take with me as I head for the door.
“And, Lucy…based on what Blanche has told me about Henry’s proclivities…you might want to read up on sadism. For starters.” With a last taunting grin over my shoulder, I revel in her ashen face before slamming the door behind me.
After a brief run to blow off some steam and a call with Dad to express my need for some work before I go any crazier, I manage to make my meeting with Blanche just in time.
“Darling! I was surprised to see your meeting request in my inbox from the middle of the night. Is everything alright?”
Okay, Blanche clearly isn’t pulling any punches today. That’s fine. She can keep her shrewd gaze on me all day long. I have nothing to hide.Technically.
