I’ve never been one to flaunt my family’s wealth. Not that it doesn’t make life easier. But when you don’t plan to live to middle age, what’s it for anyway? I would choose a modest existence—coming home to my beautiful Sunshine after my nine-to-five job—over my life any day. The life that, up until recently, I spent the majority of tracking and killing for my uncle. All the money in the world doesn’t make that worth it.
I take a few deep breaths, not sure what to say. I’ve finally hit a crossroads with her, and I can either let her in or push her away. I really should tell her it’s none of her business and move on. I’ve never allowed myself to trust anyone before, and I shouldn’t start now. But as I look into her eyes, I know I don’t have a choice. She’s been clawing her way through my tough exterior from the first day we met, and I’m a fool to think I could stop her. Especially now that she’s made her way so close to my heart.
“Come here,” I say, pulling her onto my lap so that we’re facing each other, my hands naturally falling to the curve of her hips. “I’m sorry I wasn’t more forthcoming about my family’s wealth, but it's not something I like to brag about. There was a reason for Kat to marry Henry. Unlike my family, the Sinclairs run a clean,legitimate empire. I won’t get into the specifics of things, but I’m not a good man, Sunshine.”
She pauses for a moment before placing a hand on my thigh. “You’re the best man I know, Sasha. I know you don’t give your loyalty freely, but I’ve watched you around the people you care about and…You’re so,sogood. You’ve even taken care ofme. From my morning coffee to our scenes with Blanche, you’ve made sure I was okay. I thought…well, never mind. I was being silly.”
“What’s silly?”
She tries to hang her head, but I don’t let her. I lift her chin, forcing her to meet my eyes so I can try to understand what she’s feeling. It’s hard for her to say what she wants to, but my girl is brave. “I thought…I thought that maybe I was starting to mean something to you. That Icouldmean something to you. But really, I’m just a random girl you have to work with. Who buys off-brand groceries and has to schedule rideshares because I don’t have a car. I barely even have a job, let alone a career. I don’t have a family or a legacy. I’m nothing…”
I squeeze her jaw, stopping her from finishing whatever ridiculous statement she was making.I’m nothing. The thought makes me furious. How dareanyonethink that of my Sunshine, much less my girl herself. Resting my forehead against hers, I move my hand around to the back of her neck and fist my fingers in her hair.
“You’reeverything,” I say, as I pull back just far enough to look at her. Her eyes tell a story of pure love, and I wonder if she can see how deeply I feel for her in mine.Love. Surely, I’m not there yet.
We sit frozen in time, wrapped in each other’s arms while listening to the waves crash on the shore. The sun set hours ago, and despite how dimly lit the patio is, she’s glowing. She’s my very own lighthouse. A beacon, guiding me safely through roughwaters. No, she’s more than that. She’s my strength, granting me the ability to fight through my storms. She’s not only a source of peace but also a source of hope I didn’t realize I was missing.
Fuck, maybe I do love her.
My heart, my trust? I’ve spent years building walls around them, and not once has someone threatened to break them down. I’ve had my family, and that’s been enough until her. She started chiseling away at me from the beginning. I tried to stop it. I kept telling myself that I can’t trust anyone, that she’s an outsider. But how can she be an outsider when she’s the very essence of my soul?
Even so, this is no life to bring someone into. I’m a selfish asshole for breathing the same air as her. Just living together puts her at risk. I should’ve moved out when I found out we would be roommates. I just…couldn’t. I tried to fight it.God,I tried my best to keep her at arm’s length. But dammit, I’m tired of fighting.
Fisting her hair, I pull her toward me, taking her lips. Trying the only way I know to tell her exactly how I feel.That I need her more than air.
It doesn’t take long for our bodies to react. She wraps her arms around my neck, holding herself against me while I explore. She’s only wearing an oversized T- shirt and some flimsy cotton shorts, making it easy for my hands to roam her body.She’s so soft and perfect.
I’m in control until she fists the back of my hair and pulls, causing me to lose my resolve. I deepen our kiss while my touches become frantic. I needmore. I need her bare for me. Lucy doesn’t put up any fight as I undress her. She even helps, lifting her arms so I can pull off her shirt, and lifting from my lap to remove her shorts.
When I finally have her undressed, I pull back to look at her naked body. Our breaths are labored as I take her in.Fuck, she’sbeautiful.When I’ve gone as long as I can stand without tasting her, I start a trail of kisses from her shoulder, up her neck, to her ear. “I need you, baby,” I whisper.
I groan as she runs her fingers through my hair, scratching my scalp. “Take me.” Her words are so soft I barely hear them. I can see the sincerity in her gaze, but I barely have time to look into those beautiful eyes before she’s kissing me once more. Turning us over on the patio couch, I gently lay her down beneath me. I kiss and lick and nibble down her body, from her mouth to her beautiful, glistening pussy. She writhes in my hands as I lick a strip from her ass to her clit, moaning as I tease her, before moving back down.She’s so fucking delicious.
With my tongue circling her clit, I slowly begin fucking into her cunt with one finger. Reveling in the way her walls try to pull me deeper. After I’ve gotten her relaxed, I increase my pace, adding a second finger and more direct pressure to her swollen bud. It doesn’t take long at all before she’s falling apart with her release. Her legs shake around my head, her back arches off the cushion, and her moans fill the air. When she’s come down from her high, I kiss her sensitive pussy, and work my way back up her body to take her lips. She moans into my mouth as she tastes herself on my tongue, causing my already painfully hard cock to twitch.
“Please, please, Sasha…I need you…”
Making quick work of getting out of my clothes, I line myself up to her soaking wet entrance. I’m about to bury myself in her perfect little cunt when I realize I don’t want to take her out here in the open this time. I’ve never had a problem with exhibitionism, but the chance someone could see us or hear her sweet sounds makes me angry. Every other time we’ve had sex, I’ve had to share her. I want this time to be all mine.
“Let’s go inside, baby.”
“Okay,” she breathes out, smiling softly.
With a kiss on her temple, I stand to pick her up bridal style and carry her into our room. It may be delusional, but nothing sounds better than laying her out on my bed and taking her all night, losing myself in the fantasy that this is my forever.
Chapter eighteen
Sasha carries me through the house to the primary suite and lays me on the bed before crawling on top of me. I’m already blissed out from my orgasm, but as he kisses and sucks that sweet spot at the junction of my neck and shoulder, I officially feel like I’m floating on a cloud. I don’t know what he meant by not being a good man, but I don’t believe him. And with his warm and solid body above mine, I couldn’t care less. I know I’m safe in his arms. I know he would do everything in his power to protect me. Something tells me that he would even give his life for mine.
With him still nuzzled in the crook of my neck, I kiss the top of his head, then guide him to look at me. “I need you, Sasha. Please…”
His eyes are hooded as he looks down at me. He nods, then moves one of his hands between my legs. “Fuck, you’re dripping for me.” He pushes one long finger into my pussy before quickly adding a second and finding my G-spot immediately. It doesn’t take long for pleasure to coil deep within my core.
“Please, I need more.”
He chuckles, his voice rich and seductive. “I have to get you ready, baby. I’m saving the lube for something else,” he says, using his thumb to briefly circle my back hole before adding a third finger to my pussy. “I’m going to take you completely tonight. You’re mine, Lucy, and all three of your holes will belong to me. Do you understand?Mine.”
I inhale sharply as a chill works its way through my body. I’ve never done anal before and while I told Blanche I would at least try it out for our scenes, I’ve been apprehensive about it. Suddenly, I feel like I’ll die if I don’t have his cock there. I want him everywhere, all at once. Buried so deep inside me, I’ll never have to let him go.
