I never thought it would come. And now that I have it, I don’t know how to deal with it.
I find it hard to relax and let go. Which makes me realize just how often I looked over my shoulder, and just how much of a burden I carried around with me.
That night changed everything.
Jonny died from a single bullet to his heart. Ironically, that fatal shot was fired by Denham, from Carter King’s gun. Karma had come full circle, and while I wasn’t happy that a life had been taken, I couldn’t help but feel this was the only way we could have ever moved on.
The only way out. For me. For Denham. For us.
Our pasts were intertwined. Connected by Jonny. Our hearts had been broken by him. Shattered into tiny pieces, seemingly beyond repair, until our paths crossed, and fate found a way to put us back together. But it seemed that our happiness was going to come at a price, and we were given no choice but to pay it.
That night, Denham lost his best friend. The man he thought of as a second brother.
Jack’s funeral was hard on everyone. It symbolized the end of many things, and I couldn’t help feeling heartbroken, guilty, and grateful at the same time. He had saved my life. The life I had tried to take out of desperation and despair, just hours earlier. And while I lay helpless in that hospital bed, unaware of the devastation unfolding around me, Jack had shielded my body, and risked his life for mine.
Tara was dealing with it in the way she knew best. With her head in the sand and a bottle of Tequila in her hand. She, along with the rest of us, were plagued with ‘what ifs’, only she had to deal with the regret of not acknowledging the way Jack felt about her. It was too late, and only time could heal that part of her.
Aaron took a shot to his shoulder, but it wasn’t life threatening. He was patched up, taken in for questioning, and released on bail, pending further enquiries. It turns out Jonny had people looking for me everywhere. It wasn’t until Aaron’s and my engagement picture appeared in a newspaper and one of Jonny’s hired help spotted it, that all my efforts were dashed. I don’t blame Aaron for the poor decisions he made. We’ve all made bad choices. I don’t hate him. I feel sorry for him, if anything. Despite everything, I know he’s not a bad person, and now he’s free from the web that was woven around me, and he can hopefully move on and start over. Denham has been amazing, supportive, and my rock through the hardest of times. I wouldn’t be the person I am without his unwavering support and insistence that I be my own person.
“Lotts?” I ask, turning to her as we stand in the doorway to the penthouse.
“Yes, babe?”
“Are you sure I can’t change your mind?”
She laughs softly. “Nope. I have to do this.”
“I don’t want you to go.”
Lottie drops her bags at her feet and turns to face me. “I know. But I have to do this, Ari.”
“If you’d just give him a little more time, I know he’d—”
“Don’t, Ari. I could give him weeks, months, but it wouldn’t change anything. He doesn’t want me.”
“He does want you. He’s just too proud to admit it. He’s lost the use of his legs, Lottie. How do you expect him to feel?” I can’t hide the frustration in my voice.
“Arianna,” she sighs, and I instantly feel guilty for the pain that weighs in her eyes. I’m being selfish. She needs to do this. She wants to do this for herself. As hard as it is for Spike to deal with everything that’s happened, he would be so much happier if his male pride would let her in.
“But it’s eleven hours away,” I pout, and she laughs before covering my hands with hers.
“I know. I’ll video call you all the time.”
“You’d better.” I pull my hands from hers and fling them around her neck.
Do not cry. Do not cry.
Denham comes to join us in the doorway, and he encases us both in a big group hug. As he pulls away, I’m finding it harder to retain my composure. I’m losing my best friend. She’s moving halfway around the world, and I feel like a part of me will be missing. We’ve been through so much together, especially in the last couple of months, and although I will miss her like crazy, I know she needs to do this. The selfish part of me hopes she will hate it in London and get on the first plane back. Of course, I don’t mean that. I want her to be happy, wherever she goes.
“Okay, Lotts. You ready to go?” Denham asks, grabbing up her bags for her.
She takes a deep breath and when she brings her head up; her eyes are brimming with tears.
“I love you, Ari,” she whispers, as the tears roll down her cheeks. She flings her arms around my neck, and that snaps the last bit of restraint that I have. I cry into her shoulder, hard. She’s more like a sister to me than a friend, and I already feel incomplete without her.
“Okay,” she sobs. “I can’t do this with you standing at the door and crying like a baby.” She swipes the back of her hand across her cheeks and blows out a breath. “Take care of her D- man,”she instructs, standing on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. He wraps his arm around her waist and pulls her tight into him.
“Don’t you worry about that. Take care of you, okay?”
