“It’s just… it wasn’t new to you. You knew what to do, what you wanted, and how to make me… So, I just thought…”
“I see.” He relaxed his hold on her, but didn’t let her go. He turned so that he was leaning against the counter top and she was leaning against him, but still he held her with his handsclasped behind her back. “You’re right. It wasn’t new to me. It wasn’t my first time. Far from it, in fact. But it was the first time I’ve claimed anyone — and the last.”
“So, it’s not just making love that forms the bond,” she said, still shy about the subject they were discussing. There was something different about discussing sex in the light of day versus nighttime in the bedroom.
“It’s the bite — I marked you. Making love is only part of it. But it was the first time I’ve ever made love.”
Angelle’s head came up quickly and she looked at him with confusion in her expression.
“You can have sex and not make love. I didn’t understand that until I met you. But now I know you can. And while I’ve had sex, and thought it might have been with the right person, I never claimed her. And I’m thankful I didn’t. Because though it might make me look like a selfish male, if I’d claimed her and then met you, I’d have been out of my mind until I broke from her and made you mine. I wouldn’t have been able to control myself. You’re mine. Period. She wasn't. At the time I was so angry, so frustrated because she wouldn’t just accept me. She kept talking about wanting to experience life and needing more than Whispers. But really, what she was saying was that I wasn’t enough. Oh, I was enough for sex, and a lot of it, but I wasn’t enough for a lifetime. I am thankful to all the powers, all the gods, all the spirits that may or may not guide us that she never accepted me. Because you’re where I belong, and I was on my way, I just didn’t know it.”
Angelle nodded.
He continued to maintain his hold on her, but watched her closely for a response. When there was none, he canted his head just a little..
She gave a quick little smile, when the mannerism reminded her of the way a wild animal will tilt its head when considering something it isn't sure about approaching.
“Did you expect it to be my first time?” he asked.
“No, not really. I never considered it one way or the other. But it’s occurred to me since.”
“Does it matter?” he asked.
“Yes, it does,” she said. “Can you imagine how we’d have fumbled around if one of us wasn’t experienced in what we were doing?”
Boon laughed, relieved to know that it didn’t upset her. “I’m sure we’d have found our way regardless.”
Angelle laughed softly and pushed against his chest so he’d release her. “I’m starving,” she said, going back to slicing the ham “Who was it?” she asked quietly a few seconds later, without looking his way.
He looked over at her. “Saige. She’s Destroy and Rowan’s daughter. Marauder’s sister. I told you about her, remember?”
“Well, I do now!” she exclaimed exasperatedly. “I didn’t realize yesterday that we were in her parents’ house!”
“It’s not a big deal. We didn’t work out. You and I have.”
She looked at him in surprise. “But they’ve been so nice to me! I was in their house; in her house!”
“Angelle, she didn’t want me. Was never my mate and declared it repeatedly, and made sure I wasn’t the only one she declared it to. It’s not news to them that Saige and I didn’t belong together. And technically, she doesn’t live in Whispers anymore — it’s not her house.”
“They said they were happy for you, for us,” Angelle said, thinking back over their conversations.
“And they meant it. There’s no bad blood between us. I never mistreated her. I always treated her with respect. I treated them with respect. I always treat everyone with respect untilthey make me disrespect them. And we were not the only ones of our age group experimenting. Life here is much slower than where you’re from, but the pains of growing up still apply. And we’re not quite as formal as when our parents were courting. I’m pretty sure they knew what was happening.”
Angelle nodded again.
“So, we’re okay?” he asked.
“Of course. I don’t care what you did before me. I was just curious. And now I feel bad because I didn’t realize it was her mother who hosted us yesterday. And her brother that gave me a gift.”
“What would you have said differently?”
Angelle shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Nothing. You’re always respectful, you’re always kind. And you were both yesterday. Don’t feel bad.”
Angelle sighed and nodded.
Before she finished slicing the ham he reached out and ran his fingertips along her jawline, then turned her face toward him. “I love you. There will only ever be you.”
