"I don't want to go now when everyone is showering. I'll wait for later when it's less busy in there."
There was some logic to that. I didn't like communal showers either, and I preferred to wait until I had some privacy.
"You need to talk to her," Codric said.
I didn't need him to elaborate about who I needed to talk to. "I have nothing to say to Kailin.” I opened my pack and began to organize my belongings.
It was true, whether I was angry at her or not. It was her right to choose whom she wanted to be with, and I had no right to complain. I wasn't her husband or even her boyfriend. She owed me no explanations.
"Then just kiss her. Sometimes that's better than talking." Codric shifted onto his back and folded his arms under his head. "Since no one said anything about fooling around with other cadets being disallowed, I could switch rooms with Kailin. I wouldn't mind spending the night with Shovia, so you cantalkwith her friend."
I paused, a folded shirt in my hands. "Kailin and I are friends, nothing more. But if you want to be with Shovia, I can ask Morek if I can sleep on the floor in his room."
Codric sighed. "Always so noble, Alar. Has it occurred to you that having allies who care about you might actually help your objective, not hinder it? It's obvious that they value cooperation here, and your friendship with Kailin might be an asset rather than an obstacle."
That had occurred to me after realizing that all five of us had been selected, but it was irrelevant to the current situation. Kailin was interested in someone else. Besides, she was a patriot, and I was here to snoop after her people's most guarded secrets.
A knock at our door interrupted the uncomfortable silence, and my stupid heart leaped, expecting it to be Kailin for some reason, but when Codric opened the door, it was Morek standing in the hallway.
"Some of us are gathering in the lounge," he said. "You two want to come?"
I wondered if it meant that the others had already showered and that I could go now.
Codric looked at me, eyebrow raised in question. "You game?"
I shook my head. "I'm done for today. All I want to do is shower and get into bed."
Which reminded me that I still had to make my bed.
"I'm in," Codric told Morek and then turned back to me. "Last chance to be sociable, cousin."
"I'll pass. Enjoy yourselves."
After they left, I intended to hit the showers, but I needed something to calm my nerves, so I pulled out my journal. I'd been planning to copy the layout of the academy from the sketch someone had left on the wall, and the sooner I did that, the better. It would help me memorize it so I wouldn't get turned around again. The academy occupied just a small portion of the Citadel, but the sketch didn't include anything other than the second level, which housed our dormitories and some of the classrooms.
Naturally, I would need to verify its accuracy, but it was a good start.
The task was mechanical, allowing my mind to drift, and my thoughts returned unbidden to the moment when Ravel had approached Kailin with all the swagger and confidence of a commander in the famed Fury Wing.
The recognition in her eyes had been unmistakable, and something about it continued to bother me beyond simple jealousy.
Was he the rider she'd met during the Shedun attack on her village five years ago? Could that have been Ravel? If so, it would explain the recognition.
But it had been more than that.
I was familiar with that awed and besotted look she'd given him. It was the same one that the young ladies at court who had pursued my attention had given me. I had to face my own arrogance and admit that deep down, I believed I was more deserving of such infatuation than the commander.
Frustrated with myself, I rubbed my temples. It wasn't a good feeling to realize that I was more conceited than I had believed myself to be and that my pride and arrogance needed taming.
In here, I wasn't Prince Alaranthus Tekumuton. I was just Alar Tekum.
When a tap at the door interrupted my thoughts, I rose to answer it, half expecting another cadet coming to invite me to the get-together at the lounge, but as I found Kailin standing there instead, my heart leaped at the sight of her.
She wore a determined expression, but I could see the hint of uncertainty underneath it.
"We need to talk," she said.
I was gripped by the absurd urge to pull her into my arms and kiss her like Codric had suggested, but instead, I stepped back. "Please, come in." I gestured for her to enter the room and pulled out my desk chair for her.
