Cold water on my face.
Teeth brushed.
Avoid the mirror.
I change back into yesterday’s jeans, pulling on a fresh white tank top and a green cardigan.Slipping my feet into my white loafers, I unlock the office door and step out into the main café space just as Helen arrives.I force a smile that feels paper-thin.
Round two of pretending begins.
“You’re dressed!”Helen looks up, surprised, shrugging out of her beige coat.“Seeing you in pink and white stripes was starting to grow on me.”
“No, it wasn’t,” I scoff, reaching to turn on the drip coffee maker.
“No, it wasn’t,” she admits, carrying her things to her desk.
A small, startled giggle bubbles up as I pull a new filter from its package.
Today, caffeine isn’t a luxury.
It’s a necessity for survival.
Thursday crawls.
Each hour stretches taut with unspoken anxiety.Friday looms, a dark cloud on the horizon.
Hydra.
James.
The name feels like a snake coiling in my stomach.Thoughts of James had faded, completely overshadowed by the whirlwind surrounding Matthew.But now, as Friday, my own personal doomsday, barrels closer, James’s smug face has become a constant, unwelcome phantom behind my eyes.
I nearly drop a stack of saucers when the coffee grinder kicks on unexpectedly.
I pour milk into the steaming pitcher, my focus elsewhere until it overflows.Hot white liquid spills down the side and onto the counter.
I stare blankly at the calendar hanging by the phone.The square marking Friday, tomorrow, seems to pulse with ominous energy.
“Can I top you up, Lou?”I ask, approaching his table with a freshly brewed pot.
“Right on time as always,” Lou smiles up at me from his newspaper.“Thank you, dear.Everything alright?You seem a million miles away.”
“Tired,” I confess my half-truth as I pour coffee into his mug.“It’s been a really long week.”
Fact.
“Any updates regarding the petition?”
“Not yet, I’m afraid.But hopefully soon,” I reply, my mind already snagging on tomorrow night.
“Oh, not to worry, but do keep me updated.And always let me know if there is anything else I can assist with.”
I touch his shoulder and smile down at him.“What would I do without you?”
He peers at me, his eyes lingering on my face.“Are you sure you’re alright?”
“It’s like you told me… grit and passion,” I remind him with a tired smile.“Counting on my grit and passion to pull me through.”
Lou chuckles, but the lines of worry around his eyes don’t fade.“Why don’t you sit and rest for a bit?”
