“That was terribly rude,” I spluttered as Sparrow took the flowers and dumped them into an empty water jug. “And presumptuous. I didn’t agree to go to dinner with any of you.” Dain’s sigh was barely audible, but I caught it as he settled against the wall. “Though perhaps accepting the other riders’ offer was a good idea. At least I’d be sitting with people who want my company.”
“Best not to ask what we want right now.” Kael’s eyes sliding down my body so slowly I could almost feel his gaze was to be expected. Lorien losing his smile and Lance’s eyes burning brighter blue as he did the same was not. “I can tell you it involves losing that dressing gown.”
“You–!” I snapped.
“If you need convincing that we want your company.” The lieutenant’s voice sounded hoarse, cracking on the words as he took a step closer. “I’m fairly sure each one of us could provide you with ample evidence of that.”
I blinked, going pale as my response died in my throat. My body tensed, but was it to rush towards them or away? Away, I decided finally, if only to disguise the fact my cheeks were burning bright red as scuttled back to my room.
“I need to get dressed,” I squeaked. “Then we can talk about what our next step is.”
“I’d like to take a few steps that way and join you in that room,” Lorien said under his breath. His eyes rolled my way when I paused on the threshold, simply staring. Those dark eyes always sparkled with mischief, but this… this felt different. Everything had changed now and that realisation had me stepping away from the lot of them.
Not Sparrow.
She followed me inside, slamming the door shut, then bounced over to the bed with barely contained glee.
“Did you see the four of them? They were fair undressing you with their eyes! They like you, Fern.”
“Shh!” I hissed, looking meaningfully at the door.
“They do like you!”
Her feet were up and on my bed as her arms wrapped around her knees, staring at me expectantly, but I focussed on finding a clean uniform. None in my bags. Gods, everything needed a good wash, so what was I…? I opened the wardrobe and found several uniforms hanging there. I pulled one out thankfully, getting dressed in record time and not just because I had an audience. Sparrow was far too concerned with chattering away, imagining more and more outrageous scenarios.
“Are you going to dine with them?” she asked, jumping to the next point before I could answer. “Gods, I think the silver riders would duel anyone who tried to escort you intothe mess. Lance too! If you walk in there on those fellows’ arms, you’ll have the eye of every person in the keep.”
That was enough to have me pausing.
“I…” Looking down, I focussed on doing up the fastenings of my tunic. My hair was brushed smooth and I pinned it up even though it was still damp. “Honestly, that is not my aim here. We found some information at the tomb, but there’s still more to discover.” Straightening up, I made sure my tunic was sitting right before bending over to put on my boots. “That has to be my focus for now.”
“It’s not theirs.” Sparrow’s enthusiasm refused to be dampened. “A man doesn’t bring flowers to a woman because he’s ‘seeking information.’ He does it because he wants an answer to a whole other question.”
“And that’s not something I can give them.” I met her gaze head on, a strange calm settling over me. “I feel like an idiot for saying this, especially after the way my suitors treated me at home. They made clear that I should be grateful for the attention of any man.”
“Fern–”
Sparrow’s smile faded, but I forged on.
“At least with them.” I glanced at the door. “There’s a real chance at affection. Not Dain, but…” My finger found a stray tendril of hair. Twisting it around and around, I stared at the wooden door. “I was raised to become someone’s wife, to care for my husband, bear him children and manage his household.”
My chest started to heave as my breath came faster and faster.
“It was all I wanted, was allowed to want, but then I met Auren…” Looking across at Sparrow, I saw she was hanging on my every word. “It was like I was the dragon, not her, newly hatched from my shell. The future I expected to embrace shattered and I’m still trying to work out what will replace it, but one day…” Staring past her, I saw the side of the mountain. The wildflowers bobbed in the breeze. The fluffy white clouds in the sky beyond were what held my attention. “One day I’ll learn howto fly and I can’t make promises to anyone until I’ve learned how.”
Whatever I was feeling, it was bigger than words. Just some nebulous thing that refused to allow me to settle. It was then I felt my dragon’s mind meld with mine.
Because we are queens, not whatever a wife is. After we find Drathnor’s nest, we will ride the winds, seeing where they take us. As she spoke I could see it all perfectly in my mind.Perhaps there are other ruins, other tombs that will tell us more of the way dragon queens lived.
Gods, I can’t think of anything I’d like better, I replied.We could find more Tanis eggs and record the history of Nevermere. Or ancient libraries mouldering in the bowels of some ruin. Books–
Treasure, she replied, her tone becoming breathless.
Knowledge, I added.
We will discover exactly what happened in the past, she assured me.When we understand that, then we can decide what to do in the future.
And that was what I told Sparrow.
