“You’re drunk,” Cecil said, wrinkling his nose.
“I am aware.”
Cecil’s jaw flexed at the sight of the fresh scabs on Jacob’s knuckles. “You’ve been boxing again. Don’t think I am unaware of your activities.”
Jacob yawned. “Distasteful are they, brother?”
“You know they are. If you have an interest, take lessons with Gentleman Jackson. Bet on the outcome of the matches if you must, but don’t participate like a commoner.”
The corner of Jacob’s mouth ticked down. “Don’t tell me you’re ashamed of menow. And here I thought we had such a good relationship.”
“You are my brother,” Cecil said coldly. “I would rather not be ashamed of you.”
“Is that so?” Jacob cocked his head. “Is that why you did everything in your power to ensure Father took out his anger on me and left you alone?”
Cecil’s reddened cheeks paled. For a moment, he looked like the boy Jacob remembered from his childhood. Always trying, trying, trying—and for him, trying went somewhere. He excelled at his studies, was moulded into the perfect heir, and inherited young. That, of course, had not been part of the plan, but perfect Cecil rose to the occasion.
The only thing Cecil had failed to do was protect Jacob.
“I am not . . . proud of what I did as a boy,” Cecil said falteringly. “But you have become a liability, Jacob. You have gambled away people’s fortunes at the card table. Won everything from one man and lost it to another.”
Jacob raised a brow. “Then they should have played better. And so should I.”
“Last year, you fatally shot that man when you were travelling to Hungerford.”
“A highwayman,” Jacob corrected. “An important distinction, I’m sure you agree.”
“Do you know how many strings I had to pull to ensure you could remain in the country?” Cecil demanded.
Jacob tilted his head in surprise. “I would have thought you’d want me gone.”
“And how would that have made me look? I want you to be the man we both know you could be.”
“On the contrary.” Jacob gave a lazy smile that he knew would irritate his brother. “I have become precisely what you made me. You and Father both.”
Cecil rose and paced around the room, his hands behind his back. Jacob ran a hand down his face, wondering whether, if he asked his brother to leave, he would go.
Unlikely. Cecil had not made a name for himself by respecting Jacob’s opinions and preferences.
Eventually, Cecil turned, his hands still clasped behind his back. His cravat was crooked and his eyes were a little too bright. “I intend to marry,” he said, and though Jacob pretended they didn’t, the words hit him like a brick to the chest. All the brandy in the world was not enough to keep the familiar pain from wrapping around his heart.
He would not make the same mistake again, but he could not bring himself to forget.
“I know,” he said, letting his words slur together. “The girl.”
“Jacob—” Cecil advanced two steps then, when Jacob slitted his eyes, remained in place. “We should discuss this. It’s been five years.”
“Which part would you like to discuss?” Jacob asked conversationally, the hard, angry edge to his words a throbbing undercurrent. “Are you concerned your new choice will fall for my charms?” He fixed Cecil with a cold smile. “Or, perhaps, you’re worried she will die in her attempt to flee your cruelty.”
Cecil sucked in a breath, and Jacob could not find it within himself to feel guilty. Not for this. Once, he might have been able to forgive his brother for any childhood crimes. He had not been an easy brother to manage. But he could not forgive Cecil for turning a desperate Madeline away from his door, only for her to perish on the darkened streets of London by some degenerate’s foul hand.
Just as he could never forgive himself for seducing her while she was engaged to Cecil, ruining her piece by piece, and not being enough for her to love in return.
“I could never have predicted the outcome,” Cecil said through a tight throat. “And if you had not betrayed me by—”
“You did not love her.” The words were sharp, digging into him like broken glass. Jacob almost felt the blood well in the aftermath.
“Marriage is not always about love.”
