I gasp as I stare at him curiously.
“How?” I ask, causing him to chuckle lightly.
He tilts my head back as he moves closer to me, his dark eyes locked on my blue ones, causing shivers to roll down my spine.
“It won’t be spanking, because you’d enjoy that too much. Punishment is not meant to be pleasurable. It’s intended to teach you a lesson, to correct your behavior. I think for you, orgasm denial is the way to go. Maybe not allowing you to touch me for a period of time.”
He’s quiet for a few minutes as more tears fall from my eyes, before he continues to speak.
“Tesoro, I cannot allow you to hurt yourself. Self-harm to suicide is a slippery fucking slope. Pain is a fine coping mechanism in my opinion, but only when it’s practiced in a safe, controlled setting. I’ll give that to you. All you need to do is ask.”
I nod in understanding as he removes his hand from my chin.
“I won’t hurt myself anymore.”
Knox’s lips pull up into a sexy smirk.
“Good girl. You’ll learn there are punishments for bad behavior, but also rewards when you exhibit good behavior. Right now you deserve a reward. What do you want?”
I won’t dare ask for what I want most, to touch Carter. My desires can’t come at his expense.
“Do you ever date? I think that’s what I want.”
Carter's expression registers surprise as he asks, “Have you ever been on a date?”
I pull my bottom lip between my teeth, and shake my head no. I’m excited by the thought of going on a date like a real person, but know this might not be what they want from our weird arrangement.
“If you don’t want to, it’s fine,” I say to Knox, as he stares at me with an arched brow.
He breathes out an irritated sigh.
“Don’t do that, Tesoro. Don’t tell us what you want, then say it’s ‘okay’ to not get it. Speak what you want and never accept anything less. Stand up for what you deserve. Fucking demand it. You are a fucking queen, and what you want is the rule.”
I look at Carter, and ask the question I think I already know the answer to.
“Have you ever-”
“No,” he interrupts me. “I’ve never wanted to, Little Heathen, but I do now. If you want to go on a date, I want it to.”
Killian comes storming into the room, with anger rolling off him, and I assume it’s about me as per usual.
“Matteo has been delivered. He’s in the garage. Let’s go. Your pet can wait.”
Without another word, he leaves the room as abruptly as he entered, leaving me wondering who the hell Matteo is, and what’s going on.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
KNOX
Carter glances from Heather to me, his gaze insistent. “She’s coming. We both know she can handle it.”
It’s not that I think she can’t, but she’ll see us in a much darker light, and I’m concerned about what that might mean for Carter. He won’t handle it well if it changes things between them.
“Tesoro, it should be your call, but there will be blood and violence. This man won’t leave here alive.”
She jumps up off the bed with more excitement than she should have.
“I’m coming.”
