Wasn’t shit else to say.
The penthouse was tooquiet when we walked in.
Yusef shuffled in behind me, his bag hanging off one shoulder, looking around like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to be here. Even though he’d stayed here before. Even though I’d told him a dozen times this was his space too.
Zainab came in last. Still wouldn’t look at me. Just kept her eyes on the floor, shoulders hunched, moving like she was waiting for me to explode on her.
Good. She should be waiting.
I was still mad as fuck. But my anger had a new target now, and it wasn’t the woman standing in my living room looking like a scared rabbit.
“Y’all hungry?” I asked, breaking the silence.
Yusef shrugged. “I could eat.”
Zainab shook her head, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m gonna take a shower, if that’s okay. I just… I need a minute.”
“Go ahead. You know where everything is.”
She nodded, still avoiding my eyes, and disappeared down the hall. A few seconds later I heard the water turn on.
I looked at Yusef. Lil man was standing by the windows, staring out at the Potomac, his reflection ghostly against the glass. Shoulders slumped. Head down. Carrying weight no twelve-year-old should have to carry.
“Yo.” I walked over and stood next to him. “Come sit down. We need to chop it up.”
His whole body went stiff. I saw the fear flash across his face before he tried to mask it. This kid had been through too much. And I felt for him.
We sat on the sectional, him on one end, me on the other. Gave him enough space so he didn’t feel cornered.
“You’re safe here,” I said. “You know that, right?”
He nodded, but his eyes was wary. Guarded.
“Nah, I need you to really hear me, lil man.” I leaned forward, elbows on my knees, looking him dead in the face. “Whateverhappens between me and your aunt—however that plays out—it don’t change nothing between us. You feel me? You’re safe. I ain’t gonna let shit happen to you. Not ’Shid. Not Meech. Not nobody. You understand what I’m telling you?”
His bottom lip trembled. Just for a second. Then he pulled it together, the way kids do when they’ve learned too young that showing weakness gets you hurt.
“I feel bad,” he said quietly. “About lying to you.”
“I know you do.”
“It wasn’t—” He stopped, swallowed hard. “I was doing it to protect her. My aunt. She was lying to protect me. And I was lying to protect her. It’s just…” He shrugged, looking down at his hands. “It’s been like that for so long. Since my mom died. It’s the only way we knew how to stay alive.”
My chest got tight. This fucking kid, talking about survival strategies like it was normal. Like every twelve-year-old had to learn how to keep secrets that could get people killed.
“I feel you,” I said. “More than you know.”
Yusef looked up at me. Really looked at me for the first time since we walked in. “You do?”
“Yeah.” I held his gaze, let him see I wasn’t bullshitting. “I’ve done things. Been places. Carried secrets that could bury me six feet deep if they ever came out. So I understand why y’all did what you did. I ain’t saying it was right. But I understand the why behind it.”
He nodded, some of the tension leaving his shoulders.
“But check it.” I kept my voice firm. Not harsh, but firm. “The lies stop here. Whatever happens from now on, you don’t hide shit from me. Either of you. Because I will find out. I always find out. And it’s better for everybody if I hear it from your mouth than if I gotta discover it on my own. We clear?”
“Yeah.” His voice was small but steady. “I promise.”
“That’s what I’m talking about.” I reached over and squeezed his shoulder. “Now go figure out what you wanna eat. There’s food in the fridge, or we can order whatever. Your call.”
