“Gladly. Come over here then. Come over here and look me in my eyes while I tell you what a sorry excuse for a father you are.”
“Bet. Fifteen minutes.”
The line went dead.
He showed up in ten.
I heard his car before I saw it—that loud-ass Charger with the aftermarket exhaust that announced his presence to the whole damn block. That was Zoo. Never could do nothing without making sure everybody knew about it.
I snatched the door open before he could knock. He stood there looking like shit—eyes red, clothes wrinkled, smelling like Hennessy and weed. Probably been up for days just like me, but for different reasons.
“You look rough,” I said.
“Fuck you too.” He pushed past me into the apartment. “You wanted to talk? Talk.”
“I wanted you to DO something.” I slammed the door behind him. “Not talk. Action, Shawn. Results. Something other than the nothing you been giving me.”
He spun around, getting in my space. “You think this shit is easy? Huh? You think I can just snap my fingers and find whoever did this?”
“I think if it was one of your homeboys that got killed, you’d have a name by now.” I didn’t back down. Never did with him. “I think if Brick City wanted somebody found, they’d be found. But since it’s just YOUR SON, I guess it ain’t that important.”
His jaw twitched. “Watch your mouth, Brandi.”
“Or what? What you gonna do?” I stepped closer, getting right in his face. “Hit me? That gonna bring Nigel back? That gonna make you less of a failure as a father?”
“I ain’t playing with you?—”
“And I ain’t playing with YOU!” I shoved his chest. “You a bitch, Zoo! A whole BITCH! Walking around here like you so hard, like you so gangsta, but you can’t even find out who killed your own son! What kind of man?—”
The slap came fast.
One second I was in his face, and the next my head was snapping to the side, my cheek on fire, my body stumbling into the wall. I tasted blood where I bit my tongue.
For a second, neither of us moved. Just stood there breathing hard, the echo of skin on skin hanging between us like smoke.
Then his face crumbled.
“Fuck.” He reached for me, pulling me into his chest before I could claw his eyes out like I wanted to. “Fuck, Brandi, I’m sorry. I ain’t mean to—shit. I’m sorry.”
I should’ve kneed him in his dick. Should’ve scratched his face up. Should’ve grabbed the kitchen knife and showed him what happens when you put your hands on me.
But I was tired. Bone tired. The kind of tired that settles into your soul and makes you stop caring about shit you should definitely care about.
So I let him hold me. Let myself break down against his chest. Let his arms wrap around me even though those same hands had just put bruises on my face.
We was toxic as hell. Always had been. But he was the only other person on this earth who loved Nigel as much as I did. The only one who understood this pain.
“I’m trying, B.” His voice was rough in my ear. “Every day. I’m out there. I’m asking. I’m putting pressure. But ain’t nobody talking. Whoever did this… they a ghost.”
“Then look harder.” I pulled back, wiping my face with the back of my hand. “Ask different people. I don’t care what you gotta do or who you gotta hurt. Just find them.”
“Where you want me to start? I done talked to everybody on the block. Ain’t nobody see nothing.”
“What about his friends?” It seemed obvious to me. “The kids he ran with. They might know something. Might have seen something.”
Zoo nodded slowly. “Aight. Who he be with?”
“His best friend Yusef. Lives down the hall with his mama Zahara.” I paused, remembering earlier. “Actually, you just missed them. They was leaving when I stopped by. They looked like they were taking a trip out of town or some shit.”
